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    The Newcomes

    Page 31
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    as a delassement after the fatigues incident on this great work), when he

      saw it, after a month's interval, declared the thing was rubbish, and

      massacred Britons, Malays, Dragoons, Artillery and all.

      "Hotel de la Terrasse, Rue de Rivoli,

      "April 27--May 1, 183-.

      "My Dear Pendennis--You said I might write you a line from Paris; and if

      you find in my correspondence any valuable hints for the Pall Mall

      Gazette, you are welcome to use them gratis. Now I am here, I wonder I

      have never been here before, and that I have seen the Dieppe packet a

      thousand times at Brighton pier without thinking of going on board her.

      We had a rough little passage to Boulogne. We went into action as we

      cleared Dover pier--when the first gun was fired, and a stout old lady

      was carried off by a steward to the cabin; half a dozen more dropped

      immediately, and the crew bustled about, bringing basins for the wounded.

      The Colonel smiled as he saw them fall. 'I'm an old sailor,' says he to a

      gentleman on board. 'I was coming home, sir, and we had plenty of rough

      weather on the voyage, I never thought of being unwell. My boy here, who

      made the voyage twelve years ago last May, may have lost his sea-legs;

      but for me, sir--' Here a great wave dashed over the three of us; and

      would you believe it? in five minutes after, the dear old governor was as

      ill as all the rest of the passengers. When we arrived, we went through a

      line of ropes to the custom-house, with a crowd of snobs jeering at us on

      each side; and then were carried off by a bawling commissioner to an

      hotel, where the Colonel, who speaks French beautifully, you know, told

      the waiter to get us a petit dejeuner soigne; on which the fellow,

      grinning, said, a 'nice fried sole, sir,--nice mutton-chop, sir,' in

      regular Temple Bar English; and brought us Harvey sauce with the chops,

      and the last Bell's Life to amuse us after our luncheon. I wondered if

      all the Frenchmen read Bell's Life, and if all the inns smell so of

      brandy-and-water!

      "We walked out to see the town, which I dare say you know, and therefore

      shan't describe. We saw some good studies of fishwomen with bare legs,

      and remarked that the soldiers were very dumpy and small. We were glad

      when the time came to set off by the diligence; and having the coupe to

      ourselves, made a very comfortable journey to Paris. It was jolly to hear

      the postillions crying to their horses, and the bells of the team, and to

      feel ourselves really in France. We took in provender at Abbeville and

      Amiens, and were comfortably landed here after about six-and-twenty hours

      of coaching. Didn't I get up the next morning and have a good walk in the

      Tuileries! The chestnuts were out, and the statues all shining, and all

      the windows of the palace in a blaze. It looks big enough for the king of

      the giants to live in. How grand it is! I like the barbarous splendour of

      the architecture, and the ornaments profuse and enormous with which it is

      overladen. Think of Louis XVI. with a thousand gentlemen at his back, and

      a mob of yelling ruffians in front of him, giving up his crown without a

      fight for it; leaving his friends to be butchered, and himself sneaking

      into prison! No end of little children were skipping and playing in the

      sunshiny walks, with dresses as bright and cheeks as red as the flowers

      and roses in the parterres. I couldn't help thinking of Barbaroux and his

      bloody pikemen swarming in the gardens, and fancied the Swiss in the

      windows yonder; where they were to be slaughtered when the King had

      turned his back. What a great man that Carlyle is! I have read the battle

      in his History so often, that I knew it before I had seen it. Our windows

      look out on the obelisk where the guillotine stood. The Colonel doesn't

      admire Carlyle. He says Mrs. Graham's Letters from Paris are excellent,

      and we bought Scott's Visit to Paris, and Paris Re-visited, and read them

      in the diligence. They are famous good reading; but the Palais Royal is

      very much altered since Scott's time: no end of handsome shops; I went

      there directly,--the same night we arrived, when the Colonel went to bed.

      But there is none of the fun going on which Scott describes. The laquais

      de place says Charles X. put an end to it all.

      "Next morning the governor had letters to deliver after breakfast, and

      left me at the Louvre door. I shall come and live here, I think. I feel

      as if I never want to go away. I had not been ten minutes in the place

      before I fell in love with the most beautiful creature the world has ever

      seen. She was standing silent and majestic in the centre of one of the

      rooms of the statue-gallery; and the very first glimpse of her struck one

      breathless with the sense of her beauty. I could not see the colour of

      her eyes and hair exactly, but the latter is light, and the eyes I should

      think are grey. Her complexion is of a beautiful warm marble tinge. She

      is not a clever woman, evidently; I do not think she laughs or talks

      much--she seems too lazy to do more than smile. She is only beautiful.

      This divine creature has lost an arm, which has been cut off at the

      shoulder, but she looks none the less lovely for the accident. She maybe

      some two-and-thirty years old; and she was born about two thousand years

      ago. Her name is the Venus of Milo. O Victrix! O lucky Paris! (I don't

      mean this present Lutetia, but Priam's son.) How could he give the apple

      to any else but this enslaver--this joy of gods and men? at whose benign

      presence the flowers spring up, and the smiling ocean sparkles, and the

      soft skies beam with serene light! I wish we might sacrifice. I would

      bring a spotless kid, snowy-coated, and a pair of doves and a jar of

      honey--yea, honey from Morel's in Piccadilly, thyme-flavoured, narbonian,

      and we would acknowledge the Sovereign Loveliness, and adjure the Divine

      Aphrodite. Did you ever see my pretty young cousin, Miss Newcome, Sir

      Brian's daughter? She has a great look of the huntress Diana. It is

      sometimes too proud and too cold for me. The blare of those horns is too

      shrill and the rapid pursuit through bush and bramble too daring. O thou

      generous Venus! O thou beautiful bountiful calm! At thy soft feet let me

      kneel--on cushions of Tyrian purple. Don't show this to Warrington,

      please: I never thought when I began that Pegasus was going to run away

      with me.

      "I wish I had read Greek a little more at school: it's too late at my

      age; I shall be nineteen soon, and have got my own business; but when we

      return I think I shall try and read it with Cribs. What have I been

      doing, spending six months over a picture of sepoys and dragoons cutting

      each other's throats? Art ought not to be a fever. It ought to be a calm;

      not a screaming bull-fight or a battle of gladiators, but a temple for

      placid contemplation, rapt worship, stately rhythmic ceremony, and music

      solemn and tender. I shall take down my Snyders and Rubens when I get

      home; and turn quietist. To think I have spent weeks in depicting bony

      life-guardsmen delivering cut one, or Saint George, and painting black

      beggars off a crossing!

      "What a grand thing it is to
    think of half a mile of pictures at the

      Louvre! Not but that there are a score under the old pepper-boxes in

      Trafalgar Square as fine as the best here. I don't care for any Raphael

      here, as much as our own St. Catharine. There is nothing more grand.

      Could the Pyramids of Egypt or the Colossus of Rhodes be greater than our

      Sebastian? and for our Bacchus and Ariadne, you cannot beat the best you

      know. But if we have fine jewels, here there are whole sets of them:

      there are kings and all their splendid courts round about them. J. J. and

      I must come and live here. Oh, such portraits of Titian! Oh, such swells

      by Vandyke! I'm sure he must have been as fine a gentleman as any he

      painted! It's a shame they haven't got a Sir Joshua or two. At a feast of

      painters he has a right to a place, and at the high table too. Do you

      remember Tom Rogers, of Gandish's? He used to come to my rooms--my other

      rooms in the Square. Tom is here with a fine carrotty beard, and a velvet

      jacket, cut open at the sleeves, to show that Tom has a shirt. I dare say

      it was clean last Sunday. He has not learned French yet, but pretends to

      have forgotten English; and promises to introduce me to a set of the

      French artists his camarades. There seems to be a scarcity of soap among

      these young fellows; and I think I shall cut off my mustachios; only

      Warrington will have nothing to laugh at when I come home.

      "The Colonel and I went to dine at the Cafe de Paris, and afterwards to

      the opera. Ask for huitres de Marenne when you dine here. We dined with a

      tremendous French swell, the Vicomte de Florac, officier d'ordonnance to

      one of the princes, and son of some old friends of my father's. They are

      of very high birth, but very poor. He will be a duke when his cousin, the

      Duc d'Ivry, dies. His father is quite old. The vicomte was born in

      England. He pointed out to us no end of famous people at the opera--a few

      of the Fauxbourg St. Germain, and ever so many of the present people:--M.

      Thiers, and Count Mole, and Georges Sand, and Victor Hugo, and Jules

      Janin--I forget half their names. And yesterday we went to see his

      mother, Madame de Florac. I suppose she was an old flame of the

      Colonel's, for their meeting was uncommonly ceremonious and tender. It

      was like an elderly Sir Charles Grandison saluting a middle-aged Miss

      Byron. And only fancy! the Colonel has been here once before since his

      return to England! It must have been last year, when he was away for ten

      days, whilst I was painting that rubbishing picture of the Black Prince

      waiting on King John. Madame de F. is a very grand lady, and must have

      been a great beauty in her time. There are two pictures by Gerard in her

      salon--of her and M. de Florac. M. de Florac, old swell, powder, thick

      eyebrows, hooked nose; no end of stars, ribbons, and embroidery. Madame

      also in the dress of the Empire--pensive, beautiful, black velvet, and a

      look something like my cousin's. She wore a little old-fashioned brooch

      yesterday, and said, 'Voila, la reconnoissez-vous? Last year when you

      were here, it was in the country;' and she smiled at him: and the dear

      old boy gave a sort of groan and dropped his head in his hand. I know

      what it is. I've gone through it myself. I kept for six months an absurd

      ribbon of that infernal little flirt Fanny Freeman. Don't you remember

      how angry I was when you abused her?

      "'Your father and I knew each other when we were children, my friend,'

      the Countess said to me (in the sweetest French accent). He was looking

      into the garden of the house where they live, in the Rue Saint Dominique.

      'You must come and see me often, always. You remind me of him,' and she

      added, with a very sweet kind smile, 'Do you like best to think that he

      was better-looking than you, or that you excel him?' I said I should like

      to be like him. But who is? There are cleverer fellows, I dare say; but

      where is there such a good one? I wonder whether he was very fond of

      Madame de Florac? The old Count does not show. He is quite old, and wears

      a pigtail. We saw it bobbing over his garden chair. He lets the upper

      part of his house; Major-General the Honourable Zeno F. Pokey, of

      Cincinnati, U.S., lives in it. We saw Mrs. Pokey's carriage in the court,

      and her footmen smoking cigars there; a tottering old man with feeble

      legs, as old as old Count de Florac, seemed to be the only domestic who

      waited on the family below.

      "Madame de Florac and my father talked about my profession. The Countess

      said it was a belle carriere. The Colonel said it was better than the

      army. 'Ah oui, monsieur,' says she very sadly. And then he said, 'that

      presently I should very likely come to study at Paris, when he knew there

      would be a kind friend to watch over son garcon.'

      "'But you will be here to watch over him yourself, mon ami?' says the

      French lady.

      "Father shook his head. 'I shall very probably have to go back to India,'

      he said. 'My furlough is expired. I am now taking my extra leave. If I

      can get my promotion, I need not return. Without that I cannot afford to

      live in Europe. But my absence in all probability will be but very

      short,' he said. 'And Clive is old enough now to go on without me.'

      "Is this the reason why father has been so gloomy for some months past? I

      thought it might have been some of my follies which made him

      uncomfortable; and you know I have been trying my best to amend--I have

      not half such a tailor's bill this year as last. I owe scarcely anything.

      I have paid off Moss every halfpenny for his confounded rings and

      gimcracks. I asked father about this melancholy news as we walked away

      from Madame de Florac.

      "He is not near so rich as we thought. Since he has been at home he says

      he has spent greatly more than his income, and is quite angry at his own

      extravagance. At first he thought he might have retired from the army

      altogether; but after three years at home, he finds he cannot live upon

      his income. When he gets his promotion as full Colonel, he will be

      entitled to a thousand a year; that, and what he has invested in India,

      and a little in this country, will be plenty for both of us. He never

      seems to think of my making money by my profession. Why, suppose I sell

      the 'Battle of Assaye' for 500 pounds? that will be enough to carry me on

      ever so long, without dipping into the purse of the dear old father.

      "The Viscount de Florac called to dine with us. The Colonel said he did

      not care about going out: and so the Viscount and I went together. Trois

      Freres Provencaux--he ordered the dinner and of course I paid. Then we

      went to a little theatre, and he took me behind the scenes--such a queer

      place! We went to the loge of Mademoiselle Fine who acted the part of 'Le

      petit Tambour,' in which she sings a famous song with a drum. He asked

      her and several literary fellows to supper at the Cafe Anglais. And I

      came home ever so late, and lost twenty napoleons at a game called

      bouillotte. It was all the change out of a twenty-pound note which dear

      old Binnie gave me before we set out, with a quotation out of Horace, you

      know, about Neque tu choreas sperne
    puer. O me! how guilty I felt as I

      walked home at ever so much o'clock to the Hotel de la Terrasse, and

      sneaked into our apartment! But the Colonel was sound asleep. His dear

      old boots stood sentries at his bedroom door, and I slunk into mine as

      silently as I could.

      "P.S.--Wednesday.--There's just one scrap of paper left. I have got J.

      J.'s letter. He has been to the private view of the Academy (so that his

      own picture is in), and the 'Battle of Assaye' is refused. Smee told him

      it was too big. I dare say it's very bad. I'm glad I'm away, and the

      fellows are not condoling with me.

      "Please go and see Mr. Binnie. He has come to grief. He rode the

      Colonel's horse; came down on the pavement and wrenched his leg, and I'm

      afraid the grey's. Please look at his legs; we can't understand John's

      report of them. He, I mean Mr. B., was going to Scotland to see his

      relations when the accident happened. You know he has always been going

      to Scotland to see his relations. He makes light of the business, and

      says the Colonel is not to think of coming to him: and I don't want to go

      back just yet, to see all the fellows from Gandish's and the Life

      Academy, and have them grinning at my misfortune.

      "The governor would send his regards, I dare say, but he is out, and I am

      always yours affectionately, Clive Newcome."

      "P.S.--He tipped me himself this morning; isn't he a kind, dear old

      fellow?"

      Arthur Pendennis, Esq., to Clive Newcome, Esq.

      "'Pall Mall Gazette,' Journal of Politics, Literature and Fashion, 225

      Catherine Street, Strand,

      "Dear Clive--I regret very much for Fred Bayham's sake (who has lately

      taken the responsible office of Fine Arts Critic for the P. G.) that your

      extensive picture of the 'Battle of Assaye' has not found a place in the

      Royal Academy Exhibition. F. B. is at least fifteen shillings out of

      pocket by its rejection, as he had prepared a flaming eulogium of your

      work, which of course is so much waste paper in consequence of this

      calamity. Never mind. Courage, my son. The Duke of Wellington you know

      was best back at Seringapatam before he succeeded at Assaye. I hope you

      will fight other battles, and that fortune in future years will be more

      favourable to you. The town does not talk very much of your discomfiture.

      You see the parliamentary debates are very interesting just now, and

      somehow the 'Battle of Assaye' did not seem to excite the public mind.

      "I have been to Fitzroy Square; both to the stables and the house. The

      Houyhnhnm's legs are very well; the horse slipped on his side and not on

      his knees, and has received no sort of injury. Not so Mr. Binnie; his

      ankle is much wrenched and inflamed. He must keep his sofa for many days,

      perhaps weeks. But you know he is a very cheerful philosopher, and

      endures the evils of life with much equanimity. His sister has come to

      him. I don't know whether that may be considered as a consolation of his

      evil or an aggravation of it. You know he uses the sarcastic method in

      his talk, and it was difficult to understand from him whether he was

      pleased or bored by the embraces of his relative. She was an infant when

      he last beheld her, on his departure to India. She is now (to speak with

      respect) a very brisk, plump, pretty little widow; having, seemingly,

      recovered from her grief at the death of her husband, Captain Mackenzie

      in the West Indies. Mr. Binnie was just on the point of visiting his

      relatives, who reside at Musselburgh, near Edinburgh, when he met with

      the fatal accident which prevented his visit to his native shores. His

      account of his misfortune and his lonely condition was so pathetic that

      Mrs. Mackenzie and her daughter put themselves into the Edinburgh

      steamer, and rushed to console his sofa. They occupy your bedroom and

      sitting-room, which latter Mrs. Mackenzie says no longer smells of

     


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