Leaving her ranked near the top of the hardest things
he’d had to do in a long time.
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Chapter Nine
Mike leaned against the headrest and listened to the
quiet night. He was procrastinating and didn’t give a
damn. Murphy’s Law. Just when his life hooked a turn
toward a rainbow, he’d received orders today. By 3 a.m.,
he’d be on a transport plane headed to Tikrit. The digital
clock on the SUV’s dash flashed 8 p.m. Seven hours to
pack and say goodbye to Katy and Cyn.
Forcing himself to leave the Jeep, he put one foot in
front of the other and moved toward the house.
“I’m home,” he called, opening the door.
Cyn came from the kitchen, her finger on her lips.
“Katy’s asleep.”
His brows rose. “So early?”
Mike’s eyes gravitated toward Cyn’s lips as they
turned down in a rueful expression. “She ate too much
cake and ice cream at Misty’s birthday party. Had a
stomachache.”
Great. Now he’d have to wake her up to say goodbye.
His libido stirred to life at the touch of Cyn’s hands
sliding around his middle. Did she feel his pounding
heart? He’d known this woman for less than six months
and couldn’t imagine life without her.
“Hungry?” she whispered.
He wrapped his arms around her and inhaled her
special lemon ginger scent. “You smell good enough to
eat.” “Lasagna and salad for supper.”
He hugged her before taking a step away. “Great.
Let’s dig in. Then we need to talk.” He placed his hand on
her back and moved toward the kitchen, shaking off the
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guilt for prolonging what would be an uncomfortable
conversation.
“Delicious,” Mike managed to say with a full mouth.
The spicy sauce tantalized his taste buds as his teeth
sank into pasta cooked to perfection. “Where’d you learn
to cook?”
Cyn shrugged. He frowned at the way she pushed her
food around the plate. She hadn’t taken a bite. “Nothing’s
changed between us. So stop worrying and enjoy your
meal.”
Her audible sight of relief made him smile. “I love to
cook. And have no problem eating my own creations.”
The meal progressed in silence. Every now and then
he caught her covert look in his direction. She was
nervous as a filly around a stallion. He bit his tongue so
not to laugh at his analogy.
He dreaded Cyn’s reaction when he told her he had to
leave in the morning. She might end their relationship
before it got to first base. Could he blame her? Knowing
what could happen and accepting it were two different
things. He rose and brought his plate to the sink.
“I’ll be upstairs. Come up when you’re ready.”
Cyn cringed at Mike’s terse statement. It would take
a fool not to see the pain in his eyes. Did he regret his
loving words of last night? No. She refused to succumb to
negativity. She’d come too far. She hadn’t imagined his
mounting desire earlier. If he wasn’t going to discuss their
relationship, then what did he want to talk about?
After drying the same dish for five minutes, she hung
up the dishtowel and staunchly marched to the stairs.
Whatever was going on, she’d face it head on. No more
cowering in dark corners waiting to get eaten by the
boogieman.
She hovered just inside Mike’s room, a tentative
smile on her face. Her heart skipped a beat as her gaze
fluttered to the clothes strewn across his bed. She raised
her head and met Mike’s eyes. “What are you doing?”
“Packing. I’m leaving on assignment early tomorrow
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morning.”
The tremble in her voice belied her so-called bravery.
“Where?”
“Middle East.”
Her gasp was loud in the quiet room. “No!”
Mike continued methodically packing his duffle bag.
Cyn moved across the room and grasped his bicep. He
tensed, as if waiting for the storm. “Mike? Look at me.
Please?”
With a resigned sigh, he turned, and sat on the
mattress. “I have no choice. I got my orders today.”
She sank to the floor by his feet and rested her cheek
on his thigh. Her breathing grew harsh. Another anxiety
attack. Mike reached under her arms and pulled her onto
the bed. “Slow, deep breaths.” He rested his chin on her
head and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close.
“I’ll be home in three weeks.”
A sob tore from her throat. Mike lay back, dragging
her with him. “Turn around,” he whispered.
With a half laugh, half cry, Cyn scrambled to face
him. “I’m scared. What if something happens to you? I
couldn’t stand it.”
“Nothing’s going to happen. I’m not going into
combat. My assignment is to set up communications for a
special force unit.”
“You don’t have to be in combat to get killed over
there.”
“You’re right. I promise to be careful.”
Her fingers clutched his back. “That doesn’t mean
you won’t be killed.”
Mike pulled out of her arms and tilted her chin. “I
could be hit by a car tomorrow, right here in Watertown.
Let go of your fear, Cyn, before it eats you alive. I’m in the
military. This is my job. It’s not the first time, and won’t
be the last time, I’m deployed.”
She pushed into a sitting position. Her thumb and
forefinger twisted a corner of the bedspread. Although
still labored, her breathing was easier than it had a few
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minutes ago.
“Did you think I’d leave the military because of the
way we feel about each other?”
Cyn reeled at his sudden question. “No! Yes…I don’t
know. Maybe.” She brushed her unruly curls away of her
face to better see him. “I guess I never really thought
about it,” she whispered.
He turned to his side and propped himself on an
elbow. “We need to address this. Otherwise, it’ll become a
bone of contention that might drive us apart.”
Without thought of consequence, she pushed him
onto his back and frantically tore at the buttons on his
shirt. “Nothing will come between us. Nothing. I won’t let
it.” Her strength amazed him. Her writhing body drove
him crazy. He was helpless to keep his thoughts from
having her beneath him. “Slow down.” His fingers wove
into her hair to cup the back of her head. “You’re killing
me here.”
Once his shirt was open her wandering lips skated up
his chest. The want harbored in his body for months broke
loose. Open mouthed he captured her lips without thought
of right or wrong. The sound of tearing fabric barely
registered. His? Hers? Wh
o cared? With trembling hands,
he cupped her naked breasts. His thumbs found her
hardened nipples.
Her wet teasing tongue tantalized his earlobe. One
pleasure cascaded into another until he almost burst with
need to bury himself deep inside her womb.
“Cyn, are you sure?” he managed to croak. “We
decided to wait. Don’t do this out of desperation because
I’m leaving.”
“I’m not.” She pulled back and traced his mouth with
her finger. Gasped when he sucked it into his warm
mouth. “I want you. Even if it’s just this once.”
Mike shot upright to grasp her arms and gently
shake her. “Don’t talk like that. Don’t even think it.”
She gave him a wobbly smile. “Let’s not talk at all.”
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She slid off the bed and without breaking eye contact
slipped out of her jeans and panties.
His gaze slid to her breasts, then roamed down her
body stopping briefly at her narrow waist. Her hips flared
just enough to make her slimness feminine.
“So is this a joint decision?” she teased.
Her question brought a smile to his face. “You bet.”
Cyn jumped onto the bed. He caught her around her
ribcage and flipped her onto her back. Faster than he
believed possible, he rid himself of his pants and settled
between her open legs.
A hand on either side of her head, he lowered his
body. Moaned when her legs wrapped around his back.
“Slow, Cyn. Take it slow.”
“It’s too late for that, Major. I can’t wait.”
Maneuvering her hips just so, his erection found its home.
Little by little, he pushed forward, barely able to
control his orgasm as her vaginal muscles repeatedly
clenched around him.
One thrust of her hips and he was lost. He pumped in
and out. Felt his climax building. He worried he’d come
before giving her pleasure. Just when he knew he was
about to climax she spasmed, setting off a chain reaction.
He cried out and collapsed over her body.
Cyn’s racing heart thundered in the silent room. In a
tangle of arms and legs, she clung to Mike and savored
the aftermath of his lovemaking. Never had she felt so
cherished. She waited for the guilt to come, and was
pleasantly surprised when it didn’t. For reasons she
couldn’t understand, the love she’d shared with Mike
differed from her love with Peter.
Peter had been her first love. Her friend. He
pampered and spoiled her. Held her up when he should
have forced her to stand on her own. Sex with Peter had
been pleasant…warm and cozy. Like an old slipper.
Nothing like sex with Mike. She’d never get enough
of him. Not of his hard body, his hands, his mouth and
especially not his love. Peter had been satisfied with
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whatever she’d been willing to give. Mike demanded
everything and wouldn’t settle for less.
Her skin still tingled from his touch.
A sudden cramp in her foot reminded her that her
toes were still tightly curled. She slowly released the
tension. She swallowed a yawn and shook off her
lethargy, reveling in Mike’s fingers caressing her back.
“Hey, you awake?” he asked in a gravelly voice.
“Hmm…wallowing in bliss. It was beautiful. My
imagination didn’t do it justice.”
He brought his hands to her face and touched her,
almost as if he were memorizing every line. “We’ve got to
talk. Settle this thing between us.”
“There’s nothing to settle,” she said and realized she
meant it. “I’ll conquer this fear the same way I did my
others. Promise me you’ll stay safe. Katy and I will keep
the home fires burning.”
Cyn buried her face in his neck and hoped no tears
would spill on his skin. “I love you. So damn much.”
Mike rolled to his back and brought her with him.
“Thank God Peter brought us together. Without his
interference, we might never have met.”
Cyn’s insides melted. “Peter was like that. He always
wanted to make things right for people.”
Beneath her belly, his penis stirred to life. Thoughts
of Peter vanished.
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Chapter Ten
Cyn’s eyes shot open at the magnified creak of
floorboards. The branches tapping on the windows
sounded like fingers. Had the hot water heater always
sounded so loud?
Her eyes burned with unshed tears. Mike had been
gone three hours.
Remembering Katy’s words to Mike last night
brought a smile to her face. He’d woken her to say
goodbye. His daughter had yawned, given him a big hug
and said, “Watch your back.” Then promptly went back to
sleep. Definitely a military child. Cyn, on the other hand,
had wanted to chase Mike out the door, cling to his legs
and beg him not to go.
She jumped out of bed when a low-flying jet rumbled
overhead. Possibly Mike’s ride to the other side of the
world. Panic welled in her chest. At the window, an
overcast sky prevented even a glimpse of the lights on the
transport plane. “God go with you,” she murmured.
Heart heavy, she trudged back and huddled under
the covers and breathed deep of Mike’s lingering scent on
An hour later, she gave up, climbed out from under
the tangled blankets, and shoved her feet into her warm
slippers.
By the time Katy rose, she’d done three loads of
laundry and washed the kitchen floor. Now they sat out
back on the patio, enjoying breakfast.
Katy licked yogurt off her spoon. “What are we doing
today?”
“You’ve got strawberry yogurt on your nose.” Cyn
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forced a bite of cereal into her mouth. “Haven’t got plans.
Any suggestions?”
“Could we go to a movie? Daddy always says it’s
cheaper to rent a DVD, but I like the big screen.”
With forced enthusiasm, Cyn said, “Sounds great.
We’ll look in the paper to see what’s playing.”
“Can Misty come?”
“If her mother says it’s okay.”
Katy jumped out of her chair. Cyn sucked in the
warmth of Katy’s hug and kiss before she took off like a
small twister. “I love you, Cyn,” she called over her
shoulder. “You’re the best. Gotta go call Misty.”
Cyn drained her cup. She needed to make a call as
well.
****
Nerves turned Cyn’s stomach sour. Had she made a mistake, she wondered, as she maneuvered her truck
through the military housing complex. She’d not been in
this neighborhood since the night she’d left for the Hope
Bridge. Just the thought of that dark day brought a chill.
In the backseat Katy chattered about the movie
they’d seen this afternoon.
“Hey, Cyn, are you listening to
me? Did you like Shrek the Third?”
Driving on autopilot, Cyn took a left, managing to
run onto the curb. “Sorry, sweetheart. I thought it was
great.” The lie slipped from between her lips. Truth was
she didn’t remember one damn thing about the movie.
“Tell me again where we’re going?”
“To a get-together for military wives.”
“You mean the support group?”
Was there nothing this child didn’t know? “You’ve
heard of it?”
“Sure. Misty’s mom goes when her daddy’s overseas.”
Cyn parked along the tree-lined street and shut off
the engine. “Mona Kelley said you could play with her
kids while we meet. You okay with that?”
“Sure, but we’re not going to be here for hours, are
we?”
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“You’ll be home in plenty of time to watch your
favorite show.”
“’Kay.”
Hand in hand, they went up the walkway and rang
the doorbell.
Mona opened the door and grabbed Cyn in a hard
hug. “Welcome, Cyn. I’m thrilled you decided to join us.”
Embarrassed, Cyn glanced away. “Thanks. It’s just
that…I’m thinking…I want to...”
Mona ruffled Katy’s hair. “Sue and Angel are
upstairs playing Monopoly. Why don’t you run up and join
the game.”
Once Katy had left, Mona took her by the arm and
led her to the living room where six other women sat.
“Ladies, for those of you who don’t know Cyn, she lost her
husband a while back. She’s been staying with Major
Spencer and today he deployed to Iraq.”
Cyn squirmed amongst murmurs of sympathy. With
a smile she said, “I didn’t come here for sympathy. I came
to share my experiences and to help others.”
Mona squeezed her arm. “Of course, you did.
Learning to accept support is sometimes more difficult
than giving it. Let’s sit down. Rachel was just sharing her
particularly difficult week with us.”
Three weeks later, Mike’s buzzing anticipation
vanished the instant he drove into the yard. The
darkened house and the bright outside porch light didn’t
bode well. Out of habit, his gaze went to the dashboard