She reaches out and squeezes my hand.
“Thanks Kirsten. I love you too.”
It feels great to have an actual girlfriend.
And now I look forward to starting the next chapter in my life.
Wherever it may lead.
I wipe the last tear from my cheek and grasp my locket.
I smile for the first time in months and finally allow myself to feel.
Hope.
Spring Lake, New Jersey
Present
Age 30
Kyle rushes into the house and exclaims. “It’s time! Bundle up Emily and come outside!”
He’s absolutely giddy!
I take a sleeping Emily from her cradle and place her into her one-piece pink snowsuit. Once she’s tucked safely inside, I carry her out the front door.
Kyle is standing on the front lawn with his hands on his hips, admiring his handiwork.
I reach him then turn to face the house. I gasp as I see the beauty that is before me.
Kyle has outdone himself this year. Our Christmas lights are spectacular.
Thousands and thousands of white twinkling lights adorn our windows, porch, and shrubs. I smell the pine from the fresh garland that he has expertly strung around our porch.
“Kyle, it’s perfect!” I exclaim.
And it is.
It is so perfect that I start to cry.
I do that a lot lately. Cry happy tears.
He pulls Emily and me into his chest.
“Nothing but Christmas perfection for my girls.” He softly places his lips on mine.
We make our way back inside the house and settle next to our warm fire.
“Kyle, I’m not sure what could make this Christmas any more perfect than it already is!”
I place Emily back into her cradle. She looks so peaceful. So tranquil. She is just flawless.
I turn to Kyle. “You promised me this would be our future. Thank you.”
He wraps his arms around me and kisses my neck. “I’ll always promise you Carly. I promise to love you and Emily until the day that I die. I promise to give you a life of twinkling lights and Christmas trees. I promise to keep you both safe. This has always been our future; it just took us a little while to get here.”
More happy tears stream down my cheeks.
I’m thankful for all we have gone through to get here. I’m even thankful for the pain. For without it, we wouldn’t have found our future.
Our Forever Family.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Two Years Later
Age 24
I arrive home to my new apartment. My two jobs and diligent savings over the past two years have paid off. I’m now in a nice complex in a much safer part of Philly. It feels great to have this new, fresh start.
I bend down and pick up the package in front of my door, enter my apartment and flop down onto my couch. What a long day! I worked at the bookstore today and Kirsten invited me back to her place for dinner. It was nice and simple. We had macaroni and cheese and split a beer. It was perfect.
Kirsten is genuinely a nice person and only wants to see me happy. She understands my need to be independent and doesn’t pry too much. She knows that when I’m ready, I’ll tell her all about Emily and her family. And tell her all about Carly and Kyle. She’s my best girlfriend and it feels so awesome to finally say that I have one.
It’s been almost two years since I gave up Emily.
And I’ve been on my own.
Completely.
I’m actually so proud. For once, I don’t hate myself. I learned that jealousy actually does breed hate and disease. I don’t want to hate any longer. I want to heal. I’m no longer jealous of others and what they have. I’m no longer jealous of Carly.
I love her.
I love her for keeping her promise and for giving Emily a chance at a wonderful life. Even though I am in a better place, Emily always belonged to Carly and Kyle. I knew it the moment I realized that I couldn’t keep her. They wanted her from the very beginning and she deserved to be brought up with a complete family. And they are complete in every way.
For the first time in my life, I have no regrets.
The package in my hands is from a familiar address. I receive a package from the adoption agency every six months like clockwork.
I dump the contents onto my lap and immediately start to look through them.
The photo on the cover is taken in front of their fireplace mantle. It’s gorgeous! Christmas decorations are plentiful! They are sitting on the hearth and Carly is holding Emily in front of her. Emily is wearing a red and black plaid skirt with a red turtleneck on top. She has red tights and shiny black patent leather shoes. Her curly brown hair is in pigtails fastened with red bows on either side. Her smile is huge. Her teeth are still scattered throughout her mouth, as she has been a slow teether. Her hands are in front of her as if she’s about to clap.
Kyle is sitting next to Carly with his arm around her back. Carly is leaning into his side and her head is resting on his shoulder. Their love for each other jumps off of the page. I can feel the purity and the immenseness of it. Carly’s smile is huge and infectious. I smile as I look into their eyes. This is one truly happy family.
I slowly look through the book, living each photo as if I were there. I feel blessed they choose to share these beautiful memories that they are creating. I smile as I turn to the last page. Attached with a paper clip is a heart-shaped photo of Emily smiling. Carly has these unique photos made for me every year sized just perfectly to fit my heart-shaped locket.
I remove my necklace, open the locket, and place the new picture on the right side. I keep the left side empty for my Sara. Even though I have no photos of her, she will always have a place in my heart. She deserves to share this space with her sister. I smile as I remember the sweet little baby that I was forced to give up. I can’t go back to change what happened. I can only move forward.
And I am.
Moving forward.
I place the album onto the bookshelf next to all of the other’s that the Finnegans have sent me over the past two years.
Tears spill over my cheeks as I think warm thoughts about the wonderful family that is giving Emily the life she deserves.
I hear a soft knock on my door.
I glance over to look at the clock on the wall. Seven-thirty. It must be Kirsten coming to pick me up to go to work the book signing at the shop.
I quickly swipe away the tears from my cheeks as I open the door. “Kirsten, I’m ready–” I stop abruptly. It’s not Kirsten.
My heart races. I step back and stumble away from the open door.
I choke on a sob as I slowly shake my head.
He can’t be here. No.
Why? Oh my God!
How did he find me?
Tears are now streaming down my face as I become rigid, anxious.
This can’t be happening.
My hands start to shake and my breathing becomes irregular.
I swallow harshly as my throat begins to close.
I raise my hand to my lips as panic sets in and I say his name.
“Alex.”
“Dear Emily”
Forever Family Series
Book 1
The Forever
Family Series
Book 2
Tabitha’s story continues
Early 2014
If you or someone you know has been raped or abused, please urge them to seek help. Please beg them to tell someone.
No means No.
Do something and say something.
For more information about how to help yourself or a loved one, please visit one of these important websites or call the toll-free hotlines.
RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network)
www.rainn.org
1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
Safe Horizon
www.safehorizon.org
1-800-621-HOPE (4673)
I have so many people to thank and I know that I’m going to inadvertently leave someone out so please forgive me.
I have to thank my family first since they suffered through the writing of this book along with me. However, instead of enduring the same emotional rollercoaster that I was on, they had to endure getting dressed in the dining room where the mountains of laundry piled up for weeks on end. Everyone that knows me knows that my husband is a saint. I love you Mr. Trudy. You are my Kyle.
I’m very thankful for the wonderful adoption community. Through our own personal adoption experiences, we’ve met some incredible people and families. Most importantly, I want thank all birth parents for the completely selfless decisions that you make to be sure your children have a wonderful life. We are forever grateful to our own children’s birth parents for giving us the wonderful gifts that they have. Our lives are forever changed by their choices. We have two beautiful children today because of four very special people and an incredible adoption agency that connected us.
I hope that all of my readers have friends like Becca, Callie, Manny, and Kirsten. I know that I do and I wouldn’t be the person that I am today without them in my life. We have all been through so much together and I’m so thankful for you! I love you guys so much and cheers! *Trudy raising her wine glass to you*
My family is a constant source of support and love! Thank you for helping shape the woman that I am today. I’m proud to be a part of my crazy family!
I’m in complete awe of the indie community! I’m an avid reader and frequently escape into the fictional reality that so many of my favorite authors create. I have been welcomed with such huge open arms by so many authors and bloggers it’s absolutely incredible! Thank you to the authors who immediately embraced me into this awesome club: Harper Sloan, Jade C. Jamison, Shantel Tessier, Charlene Martin, T.H. Snyder, R.D. Cole, Lola Stark, Amanda Maxlyn, Mia Fox, Michelle Polk, Brooke Page, and so many others! (Again, I’m sorry, I’m sure I’ve overlooked some) I absolutely loved the writing sprints that we’ve shared and look forward to many more!
Thank you to the following partners who helped make this book what it is today:
Kathryn Crane – editor extraordinaire! When Harper Sloan suggested you, I knew that I had to bang down your door! Thank you for all of the support and your fine skills! You helped make Dear Emily something that I’m extraordinarily proud of. Thank you!
And thank you, Katie, for assembling the best beta team a girl could ask for:
Jennifer, Jodie, Julie, Jennifer, Mindy, Christina and Tabitha. Oh my God, you girls are amazing! I’m thrilled that you connected with my characters and helped provide such amazing feedback along the way. I’m glad that we all got to share these characters together along with some laughs and tears. Love you girls!
To my personal beta team, friends who have known me for a long time. Thank you for reading along as this story unfolded. Many of you know the emotion that went into this book and some of the events that inspired it. You know how hard this book was for me to write and I thank you so much for coming along for the ride. I love you guys from the bottom of my heart. Barb, Chloe, Donna, Kathy, Karen, Sharon, Michelle, Melissa, Melanie, and Lindsey – thank you!
Steph’s Cover Design – Wow! You totally nailed it! Your cover design is truly gorgeous for Dear Emily. Stunning. Flawless. I could go on and on! It’s just so perfect and I thank you! You were an absolute pleasure to work with.
Emily Mah Tippetts – What can I say? You took an unformatted word document and turned it into a work of art. I’m so thrilled with what you were able to do and truly feel that you added beauty and depth to my story. Thank you!
Brandee’s Book Endings – Brandee, I LOVE YOU! You did an amazing job on all of the logistics from my cover reveal to blog tour. Thank you for coaching me through the process and for helping spread the word about Dear Emily. You are seriously one of the sweetest people out there and I love that you were so willing to work with me on my debut. Thank you so very much.
I need to give a huge shout out to ALL of the bloggers that took a chance and supported my debut by posting my cover reveal, social media links and reviews. There are over one hundred of you and you all ROCK!
Steve Adams from More Than A Memory Photography. Thank you! I had such a fun day with you and Jeff in Red Bank doing my headshots. Thanks for helping capture the look that I wanted for my professional photos. You are the best!
Finally, thank you to all of my new readers and friends! I hope that you continue to follow the story of these beautiful characters. They have all become a part of me and I can only hope that they touch or inspire you in some way. Stay tuned as Tabitha’s story continues.
The Forever Family series will explore the many characters that you’ve met throughout this book.
Trudy Stiles is a New Adult author, mom to two beautiful children, and married to the love of her life. She just wrote her debut novel, “Dear Emily”, and cannot wait to share it with everyone.
You’ll know that she’s writing when you see her plugged into her laptop with her earbuds in and she always has a playlist ready for her writing sprints.
When she’s not writing, she’s carting her children to their various activities while avoiding any kind of laundry or housework. She also loves to run along the boardwalk of the beautiful New Jersey shore.
She’s always been an avid reader and frequently escapes into the fictional worlds of the many characters that she has come to love. Well, now there are some fictional characters in her head dying to get out!
This first story is called “Dear Emily” and will begin the “Forever Family” series.
Email: authortrudystiles@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/authortrudystiles
Goodreads: www.goodreads.com/trudy_stiles
Twitter: @trudystiles
This ebook was designed and formatted by
www.emtippettsbookdesigns.blogspot.com
Artisan ebooks for discerning authors and publishers.
Copyright © 2013 by Trudy Stiles.
Veronica Vixley Press, Copyright ©
First published in 2013.
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual, locations or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior express, written consent of the author.
This book is intended for mature adults only. It is not suitable for anyone under the age of 18.
Cover Art Design by Steph’s Cover Design
Editing by Kathryn Crane
Interior Design and Formatting by E.M. Tippetts
ISBN-13: 978-0-9911054-0-3
Table of Contents
Title Page
Synopsis
Playlist
Dedication
Prologue
Prologue - continued
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Forty
Chapter Forty-One
Epilogue
The End
Next Book
Note to Readers
Acknowledgements
About the Author
About the Book Designer
Copyright