MllE. SKu:-.;K
Last week.
M. KRAP
(To Dr. Piouk) Mlle . Skunk is my
son 's fiancee.
DR. PIOUK
Fortunate young man .
MllE. SKUNK
(Bitterly) He cannot contain
himself for joy.
(Dr. Piouk lights a cigarette)
M. KRAP
I thought you didn 't smoke .
DR. PIOUK
I lied to you.
MME. MEeK
I am going to have to leave .
M. KRAP
You're not going to start in again .
MME. MEeK
What's to be done?
M. KRAP
The time one wastes with such
people . Go. We will call you.
MllE. SKUNK
I am going with you.
(A fierce-sounding voice is heard)
M. KRAP
Peekaboo, there she is.
MME. MEeK
At last!
DR. PIOUK
(To Mlle . Skunk) You're French,
Mademoiselle?
MllE. SKUNK
No, Monsieur.
M�1E. MEeK
You are sure that it's her?
M. KRAP
I am convinced of it.
ELEUTHERIA
33
DR. PIOUK
Scandinavian?
(A knock)
MME. PIOUK
Come in .
(Enter Jacques)
jACQUES
Madame is asking for Monsieur.
M. KRAP
It sounds like a classified ad.
MME. MECK
There isn ' t anything the matter
with Madame?
M. KRAP
You will tell Madame that -
(Changes his mind) . Help resusci-
tate me. Qacques rushes over,
helps M. Krap to get up, wants to
hold him up as far as the door. M.
Krap motions to him to get out of
the way. Reaching the door he
turns around) You see ! Once I ' m
u p I walk all by mysel£1 I g o out!
(Exit. He comes back in) I come
back in ! And I go back out! (Exit,
followed by Jacques)
MME. PIOUK
Henri is very much changed.
DR. PIOUK
Don ' t tell me you are English.
MME. MEeK
Believing he is doomed, he no
longer restrains himself.
MME. PIOUK
That's convenient.
DR. PIOUK
(Disheartened) He's a remarkable
man.
MME. PIOUK
You really think so?
DR. PIOUK
I say it as I think it.
MME. PIOUK
But from what viewpoint?
DR. PIOUK
That is difficult to say.
34
SAMUEL BECKETI
MME. PIOUK
Indeed this is the first time I am
hearing it.
DR. PIOUK
What does he do?
MME. MECK
(With pride) He is a man of
letters.
DR. PIOUK
You don 't say!
(Enter M. Krap. He reaches his
armchair and cautiously sits
down)
M. KRAP
You were saying nice things about
me, I feel it.
MME. MECK
There isn 't anything the matter
with her?
M. KRAP
She is unharmed.
MME. MECK
She is coming?
M. KRAP
She 's getting ready for that.
MME. PIOUK
There was a time when you were
unaffected.
M. KRAP
At the cost of what artifice !
DR. PIOUK
You are a writer, Monsieur?
M. KRAP
( Indignant) What gives you leave
to -
DR. PIOUK
It can be felt in the way you express yourself.
MME. PIOUK
Where has she been?
MME. MECK
She is going to tell us.
M. KRAP
I will be frank with you. I was a
writer.
MME. MECK
He is a member of the Institute !
M. KRAP
What did I tell you.
ELEUTHERIA
35
DR. PIOUK
What genre?
M. KRAP
I don 't follow you.
DR. PIOUK
I speak of your writings. Your
preferences were for what genre?
M. KRAP
For the shit genre .
MME. PIOUK
Really.
DR. PIOUK
Prose or poetry?
M. KRAP
One day the former, another day
the latter.
DR. PIOUK
And you now deem your body of
work to be complete?
M. KRAP
The Lord has flushed me out.
DR. PIOUK
A small book of memoirs does not
tempt you?
M. KRAP
That would spoil the death throes.
MME. MECK.
Admit that this is a bizarre way to
treat one 's guests.
Mu..E. SKUNK
Extremely odd.
M. KRAP
Marguerite, would you mind
changing places with Olga?
MME. PIOUK
I am happy where I am.
M. KRAP
I know. We are all happy where we
are. Very, very happy. Unfortunately our happiness is not the
ISSUe.
Mme. Meek
Which new freak is this?
M. KRAP
Don ' t you see , Marguerite , since
you do need to be told everything,
whether we see you or whether we
don ' t see you is so to speak of no
importance. I for one would not
36
SAMUEL BECKEIT
see the slightest drawback in your
disappearing this very minute.
Olga, on the other hand, has a
place among us only in so far as
she shows off her charms, that is
to say her breasts and her legs, for
her face is rather commonplace .
MME. PIOUK
As a boor you are moving ahead.
M. Kiw>
Marguerite , you are wrong to take
offense. As a brother-in-law I ' m
fond of you, very fond, and I
would be absolutely heartbroken
to see you move away. But as a how can I put it - (He snaps his
fingers) .
DR. PIOUK
Hierophant.
M. Kiw>
If you like.
(A silence)
DR. PIOUK
So, finish your phrase .
M. Kiw>
What was I saying?
DR. PIOUK
As a brother-in-law you are fond
of her, as a hierophant you - ?
M. Kiw>
( His voice breaking) I have no
family.
MME. PIOUK
He is crying!
DR. PIOUK
Do as he asks, Marguerite.
(Mme . Piouk and Mlle. Skunk
change places)
M. Kiw>
(To Mlle . Skunk) Open up your
jacket. Cross your legs. Lift your
skirt. (He helps her) There. Don 't
ELEUTHERIA
37
budge one inch.
DR. PIOUK
This is what we call a momentary
lapse.
M. KRAP
I am subject to a fair number of
them.
MME. MEeK
(Exploding) I have had enough !
M. KRAP
We have all had enough . But that
is not the issue.
MME. MECK
For me it is the issue. (Rises
massively and gathers her numerous belongings. Digs around in
her enormous bag, finally brings
out a card and reads) I must see
y ou. Come have tea tomorrow. I have a
million things to tell you. We will be
alone. (She allows time for the
message to have its effect) I don ' t
like to have my leg pulled.
M. KRAP
People are truly unbelievable .
DR. PIOUK
It i s human nature .
M. KRAP
The minute they believe they are
not having their leg pulled, they
put up with everything.
DR. PIOUK
We are put together just that way.
M. KRAP
Poor Jeanne, you might just as
well stay seated as beat around the
bush standing up, giving way
under the weight of your equipment. She commands the stage,
by God, and it hasn 't got a thing
to do with her!
MME. MECK
(In the tone of a pythoness) I am
38
SAMUEL BECKETI
but an old woman , ugly, ill and
alone. Yet the day will come when
all of you envy me.
(A silence)
M. KRAP
Touche.
(Exit Mme. Meek, slamming the
door)
DR. PIOUK
She has great foresight.
M. KRAP
But whom don 't we envy?
DR. PIOUK
She perhaps has a function you
don 't suspect.
M. KRAP
Doctor, you are getting caught up
in the game ! Watch out!
DR. PIOUK
I won ' t deny its charm.
MLLE. SKUNK
(Yawning deeply) Sorry!
MME. PIOUK
But this light is horrible !
MLLE. SKUNK
You are no longer under it
though.
MME. PIOUK
Now I see it.
MLLE. SKUNK
What is this wire for?
(She points to a thin strip of
barbed wire which, held in place
beneath the edge of the table,
extends down to the floor)
MME. PIOUK
Wire?
MLLE. SKUNK
(Putting her hand on it) It has
sharp points! Look.
(Mme. Piouk gets up and leans
forward over the table)
MME. PIOUK
How is it that I didn ' t notice it?
ELEUTHERIA
39
DR. PIOUK
My wife is but barely attuned to
the macrocosm .
M. KRAP
Yet she did react to the lighting.
DR. PIOUK
It's that it really made her suffer.
MllE. SKUNK
But what is the meaning of that?
M. KRAP
It is Victor's seat.
DR. PIOUK
He is your son?
M. KRAP
Yes, I am sure of it now.
DR. PIOUK
He took up a lot of space?
M. KRAP .
Yes, he took hold of a lot of space,
in this house .
MllE. SKUNK
I don 't understand.
M. KRAP
What don 't you understand, my
little Olga?
MllE. SKUNK
What that (She points to the wire)
has to do with Victor.
M. KRAP
Everything has to be explained to
them.
DR. PIOUK
There you have woman .
M. KRAP
Don ' t you see, my little Olga,
since Victor's departure, about
two years ago, I believe -
Mu..E. SKUNK
Two years! Two years five months!
M. KRAP
What is important about that?
MllE. SKUNK
For heaven's sake !
M. KRAP
Shall I go on? (A silence) Since
that - er - that event, my wife
has always had the desire to preserve , while so to speak doing
away with , the spots favored by
our son , for all of us had our
40
SAMUEL BECKETT
favorite spots in this house, Victor,
my wife and I , going as far back as
I can remember, and speaking for
myself personally I am still holding on to mine. (Pause) My wife
threw herself into this project long postponed, why I don 't know
- last week, and the results lie
here before you. And it is only a
beginning. Soon the apartment
will be full of barbed wire . (Pause)
It must be said, in Violette 's
defense, that for one whole afternoon she was under the spell of
the Surrealist Exhibition. (Pause )
Is this sufficiently clear?
DR. PIOUK
Much too clear. You have botched
everything.
M. KRAP
Doctor, you disappoint me.
DR. PIOUK
Are you insinuating that I 've said
something stupid?
MME. PIOUK
He is insane.
M. KRAP
Immensely stupid, Doctor. For
one must smile at one 's own
smile .
DR. PIOUK
You are right, Marguerite .
(Enter Madame Krap)
M. KRAP
Enter the Rock of Gibraltar.
MME. PIOUK
Andre, this is my sister. Violette ,
1 -
(Dr. Piouk gets up)
M. KRAP
I am sorry for not getting up. I
ELEUTHERIA
41
have a slight pain in the
MME. KRAP
Marguerite, you have taken my
seat.
MME. PIOUK
(Rising hastily) Take it.
(Mme. Krap sits down in her seat,
Mme. Piouk sits down in that of
Mme. Meek)
MME. KRAP
Good evening, Olga.
Good evening. You wanted to see
me?
MME. KRAP
Yes. Who is this man?
MME. PIOUK
He is my husband. (She gets up)
Coming, Andre?
MME. KRAP
(Forcefully) Sit down !
(Mme. Piouk wavers)
M. KRAP
Be careful .
(Mme. Piouk sits down again )
MME. KRAP
Doctor - let's see -
DR. PIOUK
Piouk. (He bows and sits down
again)
MME. KRAP
Marguerite has told us that you
love mankind. Is that possible?
MME. PIOUK
You distort my words.
DR. PIOUK
I do not love it.
MME. PIOUK
It interests him . Period.
MME. KRAP
You are interested in mankind?
DR. PIOUK
It has its moments.
MME. KRAP
You are not a Communist?
DR. PIOUK
My private life is my own business.
M. KRAP
Doctor, don 't make things worse.
42
SAMUEL BECKETI
MME. PIOUK
Where have you been? We were
beginning to worry. Andre did not
want to wait. But when I told him
how much you wanted to meet
him -
MME. KRAP
It is a sticky problem.
DR. PIOUK
Which one?
MME. KRAP
That of mankind.
DR. PIOUK
Off hand, I would agree.
M. KRAP
The best thinkers have wrestled
with it.
DR. PIOUK
I do not pretend to have surpassed them.
MME. KRAP
And what is your solution?
DR. PIOUK
My solution?
M. KRAP
In a word.
MME. KRAP
(Sternly) You do have one, I
hope .
DR. PIOUK
It lacks charm.
M. KRAP
That can 't be helped.
DR. PIOUK
Is this really the right time?
M. KRAP
It is certainly the first time I have
heard someone being pleaded
with -
MME. KRAP
Be quiet!
M. KRAP
To clear up the situation of the
human race.
DR. PIOUK
It does not seem to be the right
moment.
MME. KRAP
We will be the judge of that.
ELEUTHERIA
43
M. KRAP
Do your duty.
DR. PIOUK
So, here is what I would do -
M. KRAP
There are things to do?
DR. PIOUK
I am a practical soul.
MME. KRAP
Would you be quiet?
M. KRAP
Yes, Violette, I would indeed.
MME. KRAP
We are listening.
DR. PIOUK
Here it is. I would prohibit reproduction . I would perfect the
condom and other appliances and
generalize their use . I would
create state-run corps of abortionists. I would impose the death
sentence on every woman guilty of
having given birth . I would drown
the newborn . I would campaign in
favor of homosexuality and myself
set the example. And to get things
going, I would encourage by every
means the recourse to euthanasia,
without, however, making it an
obligation . Here you have the
broad outlines.
MME. KRAP
I was born too soon .
M. KRAP
Much too soon .
DR. PIOUK
I do not lay claim to originality. It
is a matter of organization . There
is where I have opened up new
horizons. In two years everything
will be in position. Unfortunately,
my strength is ebbing. My inner
resources as well.
44
SAMUEL BECKETT
MME. KRAP
And that child you want?
DR. PIOUK
Who told you that I want a child?
(A silence)
M:iE. PIOL'K
(To Mme . Krap) You are hateful.