‘It’s a long story, Dom. And I’m so tired.’
‘There’s no rush.’ He stood up and, taking her hand, pulled
her across to the sofa. ‘But at least make a start now.’ His eyes
– kind, trusting – focused on hers.
Where should she begin?
‘I haven’t told you everything,’ she said. ‘Because I didn’t want to ever speak about him – if I didn’t talk about any of it, it wasn’t real. It didn’t happen. It was the only way I could cope, the only way I could move forwards, get any semblance of a life after a
dreadful childhood. I’m sorry I didn’t confide in you, I really am.’
‘I understand, I do. Really.’ Dom gave her a reassuring smile.
‘So, who is this William Cawley? Why did this letter set you off?’
He held out the crumpled paper.
‘He’s my father. Birth father.’
‘Okay.’ Dom nodded gently. ‘I didn’t realise you even knew
who your father was.’
‘Oh, I knew, unfortunately.’
‘What had he been in prison for?’
The question Lizzie had dreaded.
‘When I was eight, I was taken into care. And not long after,
he abducted a young girl and killed her.’
Saying the words out loud made her feel sick to her stomach.
Seeing Dom’s shocked reaction brought bile into her mouth.
‘See why I didn’t want to acknowledge his existence?’
‘God, Lizzie. That’s some heavy shit.’
‘Quite.’ Lizzie attempted a weak smile. ‘And now he’s out,
he’s free, and I needed to come here to see if he’d returned. I
wondered if he’d come back for me.’
‘And?’ Dom looked worried. Lizzie didn’t want to alarm him,
but now she’d been honest, a weight had been lifted and she
felt the need to share the rest.
251
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 251
23/09/2019 11:31
‘He’s here. Nearby. I met him yesterday.’
‘Jesus, love. Was that a good idea? I mean, you don’t know
him, don’t know what years’ worth of prison would’ve done to
him.’
‘I know. I was aware it was risky.’
‘Why? Why put yourself through this?’
‘Closure? Some kind of explanation. The truth. All of that,
really.’
‘The truth? About what?’
‘About my alleged abuse – the reason I was taken away from
him, about Jonie Hayes’ abduction and murder. And to ask him
where he disposed of her body.’
‘Oh, my God. And what makes you think he’d tell you these
things? Or what he says will be fact? He’s had years to concoct
whatever narrative fitted – his version may not be the truth,
Lizzie.’
‘I know that. I guess I thought I’d know the truth if he told
it to me – that I’d see it in his eyes. Ridiculous, I know,’ she
said, shaking her head.
‘So, you’ve spoken to him now. What conclusion have you
come to?’
‘He says he didn’t take Jonie, and he didn’t kill her. As far as
he’s concerned it’s all lies and he was framed.’
Dom huffed. ‘Standard,’ he said, raising his eyebrows.
‘Yes. But a huge part of me believed him. And having spent
some time in Mapledon, I have to admit, there are secrets here.
Secrets that the villagers are hiding.’
Lizzie suddenly felt awake, invigorated by the discussion. As
she was speaking, the strength of her feelings intensified. Maybe she did believe her father was innocent. And that would change everything.
252
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 252
23/09/2019 11:31
Chapter Sixty-Nine
1989
Brook Cottage Store
Thursday 8th June – 41 days before
‘How’re you getting on with the action points from last week’s
meeting?’ Nell asked as she picked up the items and punched
the price into the till, her long, red nails tapping annoyingly at the keys.
Muriel turned her back fully, to shield herself from the man
in the queue behind her, before she spoke.
‘I’ve had some success, yes.’ Muriel smiled. Then added
‘Let me just serve Malcolm,’ she whispered, ‘then we can nip
into the storeroom.’
Muriel took her shopping bag and hovered near the door to
the storeroom at the rear of the shop. A few moments later, Nell
rushed towards her.
‘Come on in,’ Nell said, ushering Muriel through. ‘What’s
up? Is it what I think?’
‘Possibly,’ Muriel said, her eyebrows raised. ‘Tina?’
‘Yes! My goodness, has she had some kind of personality
transplant? She’s acting so strangely. What is up with her?’
‘She seems so distant, doesn’t she? She appears to have lost
253
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 253
23/09/2019 11:31
interest in the meetings – she doesn’t offer any suggestions anymore, barely says a word. It’s making me nervous.’
‘Should we cut her out? Even Mark doesn’t seem to be able
to talk sense into her. I think she may have lost her way.’
‘I think we should perhaps give her another chance? Maybe
see what she’s like at the next meeting at the end of the month.
It would be awkward for me to cut her out altogether, Nell.
We’ve been friends for so long, and Bella plays with Jonie all
the time.’
‘But, Muriel, if she’s not committed to the cause she shouldn’t
be privy to the discussions. She should be replaced by someone
who is.’
‘I know. I’m wondering if there’s something wrong between
her and Mark. I’ll try and have a heart-to-heart; it might not
be anything to do with our action points. She’s always been
supportive of our community work in the past. I can’t see why
she’d change her mind now.’
‘Unless she has a vested interest . . .’ Nell lowered her head,
raising her eyes over the top of her glasses to shoot Muriel a
knowing look.
‘You can’t seriously still be suggesting that, Nell, surely? I’d
know.’
‘Would you? As you said yourself, she’s been distant lately,
and now suddenly disinterested in what we’re trying to achieve.
I’m adding two and two here, that’s all. You must’ve heard the
rumours.’
‘Of course. But there’s no way. I mean, why?’
‘There’s nowt so queer as folk, as my dear grandmother would
say.’
Muriel nodded. ‘Fine. I’ll pay her a visit soon, pretend it’s
something to do with the next meeting. See if I can get her
chatting. We need to know what she’s playing at.’
254
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 254
23/09/2019 11:31
Chapter Seventy
2019
Anna
Wednesday 17th July
Anna was greeted with a worried look from her mum as soon
as she got to the foot of the stairs.
‘I was going to say, “good morning”, but from your expression
I’m guessing it’s not so good?’
‘You were right,’ Murie
l said. ‘There’s been another.’ She took
Anna’s arm and half-dragged her towards the kitchen. There,
sitting ominously on the dining table, was a doll’s leg. Polly’s
leg, Anna assumed.
‘Have you taken the note out?’
‘No. I was leaving that for you.’
‘Well, cheers,’ Anna mumbled as she sat down, squinting at
the leg. ‘Can I at least get a coffee first; my eyes aren’t even in focus yet.’
Muriel hurried to the kettle, shook it to check the water level,
then switched it on. She tapped her fingers on the worktop.
‘A watched pot never boils, Mum.’
‘Are you going to recite back to me every saying I’ve ever
uttered?’ Her voice was strained, the stress seeping from her.
‘No. Sorry. Look, I’m going to show this all to Pat later.’
255
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 255
23/09/2019 11:31
‘What? Why?’
‘Because he knows the history. Because he’s an ex-cop.
Because he could be of assistance. Lots of reasons, Mum.’
‘But we agreed no police involvement. It’ll aggravate the
situation.’
‘But we don’t know where this is all leading, do we? What if
there’s a pièce de résistance?’ Anna stopped herself from finishing her thought. She didn’t want to put any more worry on to her
mother. But it was a real concern – if Billy Cawley truly wanted
revenge, who knew where this would end? Getting police
involved might be the only thing that would prevent a tragedy.
Another one. Anna shuddered. ‘Anyway, he’s only going to offer
his opinion and Tina’s probably told him all about it anyway.
He didn’t seem surprised when I mentioned it last night.’
‘You spoke to him about it last night? Is that where you went
– to meet Pat?’
‘Yes. I want to get to the bottom of this, find the truth; and
I thought he would be a good source of information.’
‘Please, Anna. I’ve told you – there’s no point digging up the
past.’
‘I disagree. So would Lizzie.’
‘Well, she didn’t seem happy about what she’s found out so
far. What makes you think getting your hands dirty in the depths of history will do you any good either?’
‘Doesn’t the truth matter to you? What about finding out
what really happened to Jonie Hayes? What about finding her
body? Doesn’t that matter?’
‘After all this time? Maybe not.’
‘How can you say that?’ Anna’s eyes widened in shock at her
mother’s attitude. ‘You amaze me sometimes. Auntie Tina could
finally rest, for one. The dark cloud that’s hovered over Mapledon for thirty years could be lifted. It would be awful for Tina to go to her grave never knowing where her daughter was. How would
you feel if that were you?’
256
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 256
23/09/2019 11:31
‘Yes, I know. Right, here’s your coffee,’ Muriel said.
The fact her mother wasn’t keen to dig up the past was discon-
certing. It couldn’t just be that she was concerned about some
video she and Nell had made of Eliza to prove Billy was abusing
her; that she was partly responsible for Eliza being taken into
care. There was something else, there had to be. Another reason
she didn’t want this to all blow up, for the police to get involved.
Maybe in digging further, Anna would find something far worse.
Was she prepared for that?
Anna sipped the coffee and placed it on the coaster. She ran
her fingers through her hair, then got up. ‘Right, come on then,
let’s see what we’ve been left.’ She got a skewer from the drawer and stuck it inside the cavity of the plastic leg, hooking the
paper out. She took a deep steadying breath, then unfolded it.
SOMEONE KNOWS WHERE SHE IS.
‘Well, that’s obvious,’ Anna said, her shoulders slumping. She
was disappointed; she’d hoped for something a little more solid.
A clue that might actually point them in the right direction.
‘This is stupid. Whoever is doing this knows absolutely
nothing. This proves it. It’s someone who thinks they’re being
clever, but they have zero proof of anything and they’re just
fishing. Of course someone knows where she is. That evil good-for-nothing Billy Cawley does, and that’s the end of it,’ Muriel
said, shaking her head while pacing the kitchen.
‘Calm down, Mum. Come and have a seat.’
‘I can’t. I’m too on edge. And annoyed.’
‘I feel at a loss as to what to do now. Are we going to wait,
sit it out? If there’s an end point to this game, I’m not sure we should be sitting ducks, awaiting whatever comes next. This is
one game of Knock, Knock I’d rather not play.’
‘You didn’t like playing any of them,’ Muriel said flippantly.
‘No? I can’t really remember.’
‘You hated that Jonie made you play. I remember.’ Muriel looked off into the distance. ‘You used to prefer playing on your 257
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 257
23/09/2019 11:31
own – making dance routines up in your bedroom.’ Muriel gave a short laugh. ‘The ceiling would shake with all your jumping
around. You drove your dad nuts.’
‘Is that why he left?’ Anna snapped.
‘Don’t be stupid, of course not.’
‘Why did he, then?’ Now the opportunity to talk about her
dad had arisen, she wanted to take full advantage – see if Muriel stuck to her usual lines.
Muriel sighed, and Anna saw tears gather along her lower
lids. ‘You know why. Because he wanted to be with the other
woman.’
‘Who was she? You never told me anything.’
‘No one you knew. There was nothing to tell. We had our
problems and he didn’t love me; it was that simple. He loved
you, though.’
‘Well, that doesn’t make any sense now, does it? If he loved
me, he would’ve stayed in contact – visited me, or at the very
least called. He never even sent me birthday cards. That’s love,
is it?’
‘You wouldn’t understand.’
‘No, you’re right. I can’t see how he would leave me, and you
can sit here and still say that he loved me. That’s nonsensical.’
‘When Jonie was taken, it changed him. He couldn’t accept
how close you’d come to being taken away from him. He was
destroyed by the very thought. He’d never been emotionally
strong – he depended on me for that. I was the strong one.’
Anna so badly wanted to make a comment about that state-
ment, but instead said, ‘If that was the case, why didn’t he stay with you?’
‘Our marriage became very strained, very quickly, and after
I found out what he’d been up to, we both thought it best if he
left straight away. With her.’
‘I still don’t see why your marriage being strained and Dad
being overly upset about what happened meant he had to go to
258
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 258
23/09/2019 11:31
the other end of the UK, Mum. And never have contact with me? Or you? That’s weird.’
‘I
can’t speak for your father, Anna,’ she said abruptly. ‘He
had his reasons.’
‘So, you basically treated him as if he were dead, not speaking
of him, not telling me anything. That was the best thing for me,
was it?’ Anna’s voice broke; she felt the old anger resurfacing.
‘It was easier for us all.’
‘It was easier for you, you mean.’ Resentment spilled from her. ‘My God, you’re a piece of work.’ Anna got up and strode
into the lounge. She couldn’t look at Muriel right now. Was this
one of the patches of dirt her mother didn’t want her digging
in?
She wondered what else lay beneath the surface, waiting to
be unearthed.
What other truths had been buried in Mapledon all these
years?
259
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 259
23/09/2019 11:31
Chapter Seventy-One
2019
Lizzie
Wednesday 17th July – evening
Dom had been extremely understanding, albeit hurt that she’d
felt unable to tell him about her father before. Lizzie had poured it all out in a matter of an hour – every sordid detail she could remember about her childhood, all the things she’d come to
believe because of what others told her. How she’d been classed
as ‘disturbed’ by her caregivers for most of her young life. It
was only later that teachers, doctors, specialists had taken the
time to have her assessed professionally and she’d begun to
receive the help and support she so badly needed.
It was only when she’d met Dom that she truly began to look
after herself, consider herself worthy of love. Even then, she’d
struggled to believe she wouldn’t be abandoned, cast aside for
something, or someone, better. She still struggled. She hadn’t
wanted to purposely build a wall around herself, but she’d considered the barrier to be a requirement – a back-up, just in case.
Lizzie perched on the edge of the bed watching Dom as he
slept. The journey down, the emotionally draining evening, and
maybe the relief from his point of view that her sudden depar-
ture hadn’t been anything to do with him, had all taken its
260
IDareYou_B_2ndRevise_20190923_849YY.indd 260
23/09/2019 11:31
effect. It never took much for him to crash. And tonight, Lizzie was glad he had. It would make it easier for her to sneak out.
After the revelations at Anna’s house, hearing Muriel’s confes-
sion and also her belief something had happened to Rob Andrews