Carriage Returns
Poetry 1988-2008
By
Robert Ropars
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PUBLISHED BY:
Carriage Returns
Poetry 1988-2008
Copyright © 2008-2010 by Robert Ropars
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
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Dedicated with love and affection
To my family: ever a source of inspiration and strength.
To my love: ever on my mind and guiding my heart.
To all my friends: ever a source of support and encouragement.
Contact the author:
Email: robropars@gmail.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/robertropars
* * * * *
CARRIAGE RETURNS
* * * * *
Haunted
You wait for me
While I sleep
Like Mary’s lamb
Wherever I go
There you are
Like an angelic demon
Possessing my soul
Your ghost remains
No priest can dispel
The lost love
Of an empty soul
Though I live on
It’s always alone
In your shadow
Brightened by your darkness
Calmed by you cold touch
I need you still
* * * * *
An Old Church
Sweet twisting daggers of the mind
Little pixies dance on the altar of perception
Burning so bright preventing clear sight
A chorus screeching deafening the ears
Mighty strength of water crashing over falls
Swiftly selectively combing through dark places
Reds Greens Blues explode chained to Yellows and Oranges
Cutting through self-mockery and deceitful greedy malice
So marked by these falling ruins
* * * * *
The Danger of Loving You
Like a moth I’m ever drawn closer to your flame
My heart yearns to burn in your heat
Touch me now so may know you feel the same
All my life I’ve searched for such passion
Deep in the night in your eyes I see what I seek
Your eyes burned through my loneliness
Now all I can see is my love etched in those blue eyes
As you engulf me with flames of intense love
I know surrender so complete it scares me
A person shouldn’t feel this much passion
The rest of the world is now black and white
I live to see the colors your love creates
How else can I make it through each day without you
I wish you could know how much you mean to me
As I nightly die within your fiery embrace
Know that my escaping soul has found paradise
* * * * *
The Burning Touch of Fire
Never before and never again will I know
The pain of such heat and passion in my heart
Your love has burned away the ice and cold
I can barely understand this feeling inside
Now all things glow with your love and kindness
Take me now again into this light into this love
How ever did you come to be and how ever did I find
You can’t be real my mind won’t allow you to be
A brand new me has replaced the old one
I surrender my dear without question
No longer an empty shell the blood stirs in me
Through my veins runs fluid that burns
Driving me mad I can’t go on but I must
How much more can I endure before I collapse
I must continue onward facing whatever pain comes
I surrender my dear without question
Hoping only to share some of that power with you
Knowing I will fail miserably and die trying
But know that your heart has made mine whole again
My soul sings in praise of that singular gift
A life renewed by the ever-wondrous love
Given to me by this angel from above
I surrender my dear without question
* * * * *
Autumn
The colors of your heart captivate
Changing daily over time
I stand in the glow of your soul's bonfire
Keeping warm and the chilly air at bay
I want to always be in this season
Somewhere between heat and cold
Only here do I feel truly happy
Our love should know no seasons
Only Autumn ever more
Winds blow across our bodies
Sunlight burns red through your hair
I feel the stare of pumpkins
Spying on our love as winds howl
Spirits walk past our circle
I fear nothing you are so strong
And in this of all seasons
Your power is beyond understanding
I submit mind body and soul
As my tears of love fall
You pull me closer still
* * * * *
Dancing Shadows
Darkness fills the room where the remains of our loving lay
Cuddled in each other’s arms we ward off the cold air of midnight
Our warm bodies retain the glow and heat of passion
As we lay falling asleep our eyes drift upwards
Shadow figures dance to the music of the flickering candles
Created by the heat and light of nearby flames
They are cold and distant like the troubles of our lives
Our love protects us and pushes away all fear and pain
And like those candles I cannot stare at you
For in your incandescent radiance I will surely be blinded
And how on Earth can I go another day unable to see
What beauty rests in your sweet face and deep in those eyes
We fall into the dreamworld together safe from danger
All our troubles dancing safely out of reach
The music of the flames keeping them occupied and unaware
So sleep with me darling and know peace
And those shadows will dance on unaware
* * * * *
Never Let Go
For years have I searched for such love
In your arms I have found a sacred serenity
Hold me now my love and never let go
The world is cold and empty without you
Your touch drains all pain and fear from me
If only you could know how I love you
Deep in the night the stars burn bright
But they all fade in the light of your heart
Take me now my love and never let go
Lead me deep within the garden of your soul
I want to bathe in your presence forever
And knowing such glorious release
I will fly away into the night with you
You are my saving angel my dear
I am blessed by your lips and breath
Kiss me now my love and never let go
* * * * *
From Camelot to Avalon
Arthur’s weary face wrinkled into a smile
Cold morning air filled his nostrils
Dawn’s early mists wet his cheeks
The valley below was obscured by the haze
Hiding Mordred and his fallen angels
He turned to his legion of friends
They who would follow him to their deaths
Did his mind wander upon his fate
Or to his queen’s betrayal
The Grail Quest that took so many friends
Or did he only think of Lady Britain
Excalibur managed to flash in the fog
As Arthur led his men down the hill
And into the cold mists of history
* * * * *
Picnic
Flowers bend
Catching a breeze
As our picnic unfolds
The sun burns bright
Firing your eyes
Eyes of blue
Champagne toasts begin
Warming us within
Your golden hair alight
Whispering willow above
Dappling the sunlight
As we lay chasing dreams
In our private heaven
* * * * *
Eyes of Ocean Blue
In the sea the anemone dance in your naked eyes
The seagulls cry out in jest circling above
My fingers caress you under the water
The winds play with your hair
As we lovers tease and explore
Mermaids taunt nearby playing along
As we give in to what is between us
Let the heat mix with the cold sea
The waves grip and pull around us
In a frenzied embrace we join the rising tide
Starfish race seahorses to the shore
As they are driven into land by a wave
We tumble into the sky in each other’s arms
Your eyes of ocean blue consume me
As jets of sea mist spray our bodies
We stiffen as we hit our shore
And become liquid drifting freely
In each other
Mask of Love
How could I have know
The sweet girl next door
Could have such power
To hurt and love with leather
Where does she find the whips
Why does she like me bound
As she slaps and cuts
Coldly smiling behind her mask
The mask of control
How could I have known
You daughter of perversion
Mistress of domination
Disciple of de Sade
That you could be so
Good
* * * * *
“_____” Dies
A cold winter chill turns the cheeks a dark red
Streetlights and neon flicker with false warmth
“_____” turns over to the left side again
The blanket of newspapers fall from on her paved mattress
Dark with grime she awakens looking around the alley
Through weary eyes rarely used, eyes hardly needed eyes
A cat cries somewhere as she tries to
Two blocks away children selling their bodies
Money to survive another week in hell
“_____” hasn’t been worth a dime in years
Once laying with strangers now lying alone
Saving for the exodus from oppression and pain
Trying to stay warm looking for food dying
No longer able to attract attention and so tired
Her eyes close for another sleep
To the sweet blues of late-night traffic
In an alley full of waste and smells
No one noticed “_____” fade further into the scene
No one heard the last wishes, last prayers
That didn’t quite escape her dying lips
* * * * *
Firedance
The frozen wastes of my heart
Now feel the heat of your smile
Like a blessed sacrament
You raise me among the eagles
Surrounding me like a whirlpool
Gently, long lost feelings surface
Giving me purpose again
I come out of my dream
Blinking at the light
In your eyes
Dazzled and startled
Yet deeply comforted
I stand to face you
Taking you in my arms
We dance around our fire
Turning and swaying
Near the dizzying heat
Wandering closer to it
Trying to avoid the flames
We are drawn into its realm
Consumed yet we dance on
Spirits in the smoke
Crazily twisting
Up into the night
Our dance written in the stars
* * * * *
Mindvision
As darkness caresses the land
A fire lit my mind’s eye
Almost a dream almost real
Your fingers are sunbeams
Warming my outer shell
Breaking free I emerge
A new form of being
Your sunlit kisses strike
My eager body shakes
Unfolding beneath your warmth
We chase away the dark
Light up the night
What crazed mind
Sees a butterfly and sunbeam
Dancing in the darkness
Redefining what life is
As what could be
What must be
Colors hidden by darkness
Still persist unchanged
Kept alive by thought
By the rushing cries
Of starlit bliss
Overcome by the strength
In your heated caress
I surrender to you
Lay in your arms
As my mind shifts focus
Into another dream
You remain my guide
* * * * *
Rainday
I turn from the window
And look at you
Naked as the night
You lay dreaming
How am I so lucky
I haven’t got a clue
I silently thank God
As tears are streaming
You stir
In your far away fantasy
Are we riding
A wild horse on an isle
Do we hold tight to the palomino
Dodging the sea
The full moon dances on your eyes
As we hold each other for awhile
Is that your dream
Making endless love in the sand
I return to the bed and lay
Face on your breasts
You move and stroke my back
And my neck with your hand
I start to say I’m sorry for
Ending your rest
You pull me closer and we kiss
The rain slows
We hold tight and I say
I was watching you
There are no lies when we’re this close
You whisper
You were being watched too
* * * * *
Because of you
Snow falls on the scattered pines
A cold wind cuts through my clothes
But I don’t feel winter’s icy touch
My heart is glowi
ng with new warmth
Your love has rekindled its flame
Not long ago I feared a lifetime alone
A life without color
All beauty buried
But like the spring sun this snow will melt
And I know whom to thank
Who to praise
You, my love, you
Bringer of warmth and love
I’ve waited so long to feel this happy
I know we have a long way to go
But I’ll never get lost with your heart guiding me
Take my hand dear love and hold it tight
Know that I am so happy in your presence
Because of you
I am at peace
* * * * *
What I’m made of
My heart is a garden
A hidden place
Doesn’t appear on a map
The greens
The reds
The oranges
The yellows
Colors explode all around
Winter never shows its face
Spring, summer and fall
Existing as one all the time
Visitors never feel a chill
Come through the lone gate
Into my garden
The beauty is easily missed
It doesn’t appear to be much
From a distance it’s any garden
Come sit under a maple
Take a swing on the hanging chair
Happiness and pleasure guaranteed
Few approach the gate
Fewer still come inside
But no visitor has left
Unchanged by the beauty
No visitor is turned away
Stop in any time
* * * * *
Patience
Patience is a virtue
Or so we’re told
Does patience coronate
Am I a king of virtue
When we sit and talk
So close but so far apart
I wait wanting to be
Alone with you
To hold you gently
Love you faithfully
Treat you as a lady
Will we start down this path
How far will we follow it
Would you remain by me
Will you when you know
How I feel warm
When you’re near
How I want to move closer
To touch you