FISH OUT OF WATER
Characters: Apart from Orville, Pat and Zenobia, all are passengers.
Anne amiable and considerate associate of Helen.
Brian undercover agent.
Carol Jim's wife, affectionate though inclined to tease.
Dennis a wag among the genuine holidaymakers
Evelyn plain-clothes anti-terrorist.
Freda forthright member of the sextet.
George Brian's assistant.
Helen an undercover agent very interested in Jim.
Iris holidaymaker.
Jim ostensibly a college lecturer, suspected to be a personage incognito.
Karen leader of a musical sextet; not a beauty.
Linda member of the sextet.
Mike a sheep in wolf's clothing, playing up to Yvette.
Nerys member of the sextet.
Orville cruise manager.
Pat UK consular official.
Queenie posing as a thoroughly obnoxious, self-absorbed American bridge fiend.
Ruth holidaymaker.
Sue holidaymaker.
Tom Dept. of Trade & Industry official
Ursula member of the sextet.
Vera member of the sextet.
Walter holidaymaker; an organising type.
Xanthi holidaymaker, reluctant member of Queenie's bridge school
Yvette attractive and mock-flirtatious holidaymaker.
Zenobia Reception clerk; fairly new to the job, bright, patient and efficient but sorely tried at times and not quite au fait with the convention of never showing it.
Set
The reception area aboard the "Onegin Arcadia", a cruise boat on the Rhine. A desk is placed diagonally mid-left with a telephone and a computer or typewriter. One chair is behind it and others wherever convenient near an easel bearing various notices UR. The ship's restaurant is off stage right, the bar lounge off stage left. A door UC leads to a narrow side deck, railed, with access to unseen stairs, and an internal stairway to the cabin deck is unseen DR.
Time
The present.