then several minutes to recover.
I can do this.
I can-
Oh, God!
It’s okay. It’s okay.
Just so long as
it doesn’t get worse.
Worse
I lie in a room
with other screaming ladies,
their cries setting
my nerves on edge.
I wish they’d all go away.
Instead, there’s Mom and Seth-
when did she get here?-
plus a parade of nurses
and the social worker
asking every ten seconds,
“Are you okay? Are you okay?”
No! What do you expect me to say?
I’m scared to death.
And by the way,
there’s an alien in my body
bent on ripping me apart!
Eight Hours
When will it end?
I float in a river of sweat,
this baby too stubborn
to come out.
Don’t know
how much more of this
I can take.
I’d keep crying, but
I just don’t have
the energy.
Oh, God!
Here comes another
CONTRACTION!
Fourteen Hours
I can’t take this! Why doesn’t somebody
just slice me open like a melon
and get it over with?
My immune system’s resistance
is nonexistent.
I’m wracked with fever,
the tail end of a cold
fanned into full infection.
A film of gunk
covers each eye,
but so what?
Right now, the only thing
I want to see
is this baby
out
of
me!
The Golden Hour
One more push
I didn’t know
I had in me.
And then
that blood-soaked eel
of a human being
finally squirts out of me,
his cry
the only sound
strong enough
to drown
my pain.
Sweet
Call it amnesia,
this sweet something that
erases all traces
of birth-pang memory.
I welcome the peace
that blankets me like fleece.
Outside my room,
the social worker waits
for my decision.
I take my time,
stare into love’s eyes,
and count each finger, each toe.
No math
is more beautiful.
I name him Mine,
if only for a moment.
What was it
Sister Pauline said?
Mary trusted God.
Yes.
Yes.
Acknowledgements
This book had a long and circuitous journey, and many helped along the way.
First, the manuscript passed through the hands of editors Donna Bray, Arianne Lewin, and Jacque Alberta. I thank each for her part in helping to shape the story.
I owe a special debt of gratitude to Ginny M.M. Schneider and Gina Marie Mammano V. for reading early versions of the text. Your honest, intuitive response was a great encouragement.
Thanks, always, to my agent Elizabeth Harding, the best partner and cheerleader an author could have.
Finally, grateful thanks to Amy Wevodau Malskeit, who put in countless hours critiquing various drafts of this novel. Amy, words fail.
I hope I did you all proud.
Nikki Grimes
New York Times best-selling author Nikki Grimes is nationally renowned for her children's works and poetry. Nikki was the recipient of the 2006 National Council of Teachers of English Award for Excellence in Poetry for Children.
***
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