Then it was as if the years zoomed by, because they had, and the next shot was of Ryan asleep on my couch the first time he’d spent the night. Pictures of Tyler that he’d been looking through and the open box I kept them in were haphazardly displayed on the coffee table next to him, and on his chest was the picture of Tyler and me the day he’d been born. I’m not sure if he realized he’d fallen asleep with it in his hand, but I’d removed it before he’d woken up anyway.
Ryan looked up at me in surprise. “You took pictures of me that first night?”
I nodded, trying not to feel embarrassed. “Yeah, you looked really beautiful with your shirt off on my couch, and I couldn’t help myself.”
He just nodded once, and I couldn’t tell if he was mad. He wasn’t telling me anything and neither was his expression.
The next few pictures were ones I’d taken in the past few months. There were a few from Ryan’s rehearsal dinner and the night he’d finally let loose with Brandon and me, one of Ryan kneeling in front of Tyler’s headstone, one of him looking at the pictures of Tyler and me on my mantle, and finally, one of us I’d taken when we’d been cuddling on the couch that rounded out the journey of more than eleven years.
“Are you upset?” I asked, as he stared at the picture on the screen.
He shook his head. Then he looked over at me. “It’s our story.”
I nodded. “Yeah, it is. I really wanted to capture everything that tore us apart and brought us together, because regardless of the good and bad, the story has a happy ending.”
“You’ve never used pictures of Tyler in a show before,” he said. “Why now?”
I shrugged. “Because of you.”
“Me?”
I nodded. “Yeah. My life changed when Tyler was born, but it honestly changed the moment I met you. And for a long time, I wasn’t happy because I’d lost the two people I loved most. Now I have one of them back, and for the first time in years, I’m happy. And I didn’t realize that before. Even though I had my friends and my shop and my art, I was missing so much. I can’t get Tyler back, but in a strange way, he brought us back together. He gave me you again, and this is my way of showing you, and frankly the general population, that even through all I’ve been through and all I’ve lost, I have something so rare and so special.”
“What’s that?” he asked, not fully getting where I going with my diatribe.
I smiled. “I have your love, and that’s the most incredible thing in the world.”
Tears surprised me when they pricked the backs of my eyes, and Ryan pulled me into his arms. “You’ve always had my love,” he murmured against my temple before he kissed it.
I nodded, as the tears spilled down my cheeks. “I know. I’m just really grateful for it.”
We sat in silence for a few minutes, his arms holding me tight, the last picture in the series still glowing from the computer screen.
Ryan took a deep breath. “I think the show is going to be amazing, Harper. I can’t wait to see these pictures blown up on the wall. I think it might be your best show yet.”
I nodded against his chest. “Thank you. I just hope I was able to capture the feelings and the emotion in these pictures, you know. I wanted to really tell the story.”
“You did,” he said quietly. “You always do. But you know the story isn’t over yet, right?”
I looked up at him. “What do you mean?”
I felt my heart start to pound at the idea of having another child, and I realized that in the back of my mind, I never thought I’d ever entertain the idea of more children. I was scared – scared of the unknown and of my past and of history repeating itself, and I hated the idea of potentially replacing Tyler. He was my baby. He couldn’t be replaced.
“And one day,” Ryan continued, “when our baby is old enough, we’ll tell him or her about Tyler, who would have been the best big brother. And we’ll make sure that he or she knows how special he was and how much we miss him.”
“Ryan, I don’t know,” I said, so afraid to share with him what I was feeling, what I was afraid of.
“I know. Today, the idea seems scary, but one day you’ll be ready. And it will be incredible. I’ll be the best father, and we already know you’ll be an amazing mom. And we will love our child, or children,” he winked at me and smiled, “unconditionally and never put parameters around what they can do or who they can love. Their lives will be completely their own.”
A tear leaked out of my eye as I looked up at him and saw the conviction in his eyes. I understood that for him, having a family was about creating something together and enriching the life we would already have, but it was also about making sure no child of his went through what either of us had to endure from our families.
I knew Ryan hadn’t spoken to his parents or his sister since the wedding. He kept in touch with his brother, and John was coming out to visit us at Christmastime, but having your family reduced to one person was tough. I’d been there. He’d given up so much that day, and I didn’t blame him, but at the same time I didn’t want to make it worse.
“You know you do have to put some parameters around your kids,” I told him, aiming for playful. There would be plenty of time to hash out my fears. He wasn’t asking me to make any decisions just yet.
Ryan grinned. “That’s why I know you’ll be a great mom. But like I said, our life together is just starting. We have plenty of time to iron out the details. For now, we’re together, I love you more than life itself, and I think you’re so incredible.”
“I love you,” I told him, as I leaned up to kiss him.
“I love you more,” he said, as he returned my kiss.
About the Author
Thanks so much for reading Work of Art, my seventh full-length novel. I really hope you enjoyed it as much as I loved writing it and developing the characters that helped bring the story to life. If you are interested in reading my other novels, they are also available in e-book format online
Books have always had a big part in my life, and I probably spend way more time reading that I should, engrossed in the stories that keep me captivated. I am a total sucker for romantic comedies in all forms, because at the end of the day I just want to laugh and see some really great people fall in love. When those stories are mixed with an awesome soundtrack, it just doesn’t get much better than that.
In addition to books, I have a serious love for the Florida Gators and the Boston Red Sox, I am addicted to fashion, and I never go anywhere without my iPod. Give me a grande non-fat vanilla latte from Starbucks and chips and queso from Tijuana Flats, and I am a happy girl.
You can read more about me online at: http://www.goodreads.com/monicaalexander
Other Books by Monica Alexander
Just Watch the Fireworks
Aftershocks
Broken Fairytales
Buried Castles
Searching for Neverland
Playlist
I listen to music constantly, so inevitably songs have a way of working themselves into my stories. Below is a playlist of the songs I hear when I read this book. Some songs I referenced in the book itself, and others are just ones that I felt fit in nicely with story. Enjoy!
Minority – Green Day
All Alone – Fun.
Howl – The Gaslight Anthem
Shake it Out – Florence + the Machine
Creep – Radiohead
Machinehead – Bush
Mad World – Gary Jules (feat. Michael Andrews)
Waiting for the End – Linkin Park
The Longer I Run – Peter Bradley Adams
Broken M
irrors – Rise Against
Sad Beautiful Tragic – Taylor Swift
I Almost Do – Taylor Swift
Name – The Goo Goo Dolls
Disarm – Smashing Pumpkins
Ronan – Taylor Swift
Breathe In Breathe Out – Mat Kearney
Beam Me Up – P!nk
Nothing Left to Say/Rocks – Imagine Dragons
The World is Ugly – My Chemical Romance
People Like Us – Kelly Clarkson
Speak Now – Taylor Swift
Plowed – SPONGE
Timeless – The Airborne Toxic Event
Suborn Love – The Lumineers
One Headlight – The Wallflowers
Here Comes Your Man – The Gaslight Anthem
Lover’s Eyes – Mumford & Sons
All Over You – Spill Canvas
If I Lose Myself – OneRepublic
Tell Me a Story – Phillip Phillips
Be Still – The Fray
The Forgotten – Green Day
Gold on the Ceiling – The Black Keys