[[||]] … from the inside flap …
Here within lies over four dozen short stories that run the gamut from the maniacally meta-real to the sometimes surreal to the oddly ordinary. Most fall between 1,500 and 2,000 words, but there are a few longer pieces that are almost mini-novellas.
The two primary characters in these tales of extricated intrigue are Agents 32 and 33 of a nebulous entity known as psecret psociety (yes, with silent p’s). Agent 33 is the author (Parkaar) and Agent 32 is the author’s wife (Monique).
So, if you find yourself needing to have some interesting (or at least different) reading material to fill those thirteen-to-seventeen-minute gaps in your day, this may very well be your ticket to slide … into knowhere. [sic]
Psecret psociety pshort pstories
Vol. I (2010-15)
by Mike Bozart
Edition: won, eh?
© 2016 Mike Bozart, all rights reserved
And now for some somber legalese …
First and foremost, this collection of short stories is a volume of fiction, and is not a factual account of any slice of the space-time continuum on Earth or anywhere else. Names, characters, places, events, incidents, and situations are either the product of the author’s warped imagination or are used in a purely and wholly fictitious fashion. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or their otherworldly spirits, or any locales or proprietary objects, is entirely, and without exception, coincidental.
cover art by M. van Tryke
This collection of tales
is dedicated to those
of you who pause
to gratuitously ponder
on the accumulated dust
on the shoe molding
on cold-floor mornings
while the faucet
d
r
i
p
s
~{~
Table of Contents
Inside flap
Title page
Disclaimer
Dedication
Foreword
Preface
Acknowledgments
Epigraph
About the Author
1. spelling rewls
2. Legend Has It That
3. Galax- Galaxy
4. SFO |_| SOFA
5. Plasma & Wigwood
6. Availing Asheville
7. Agent 107: A Final Report
8. Disconnected in DC
9. Greensboro Gaffe
10. NoDa Soda
11. Boone There ~ Fun That
12. Siquijor Seduction Zone
13. Psatori
14. Wrightsville Beached
15. His Name was Ted Maize
16. A Tour to the Tower
17. Caught Wild in Cotswold
18. That Old Ball Game
19. Water Hammer
20. A Search for Sidle on N
21. Zoo Are You?
22. Overheard & Overhead
23. Carolina Beached
24. Windmill with a View
25. Ok, Roll the Dice
26. The Right Triangle
27. Mysterieau Returns
28. Bangkok in Salisbury
29. Airported to Knowhere
30. Lucky Strikes
31. LFC in CLT
32. The Bulge
33. One October Day
34. Fall of the Yellow Jackets
35. One Day in November
36. Rooftop Horror
37. The Balcony
38. Found Note
39. A Trek to Zeke’s Island
40. Vermont Street
41. Beanstreets
42. Bottled
43. Portland Portent
44. Kron by Night
45. Le Noir de Lenoir
47. December Delirium
48. Boxing Day
Bonus: Gold, the short story
Foreword
So, now it’s a collection of somewhat strange, curiously pedestrian, and often inside-outed short stories. And, of course, a lot of recursion looping around in these scripts. Well, if nothing else, they got my mind off of my painful roids [sic] for a while.
I went ahead and printed them out. I’m old in the tooth and in the school. Yes, I printed all 49 of the little fockers. [sic] They are all over my desk. Some are on the coffee table, doubling as coasters. The coffee mug stain on the cover image is like a brown corona. A perfect concentric ring. Oh, and some are still in the bathroom. Perfect reads while on the crapper.
Listen now, it’s not O. Henry by any stretch. There are some sparse stretches. Vacant terrain … for mental meandering?
Yes, I could see the ‘For Let’ signs (recalling my British vacation), but just wondered where the previous tenants were now. And that wasn’t getting me any closer to a paid lunch. Furthermore, I can’t afford any more expensive time off. This should give you a hint of what’s in store.
Well, there ya go. I start reading one these short stories and the lines for a short story come out like wine from a leaking oak cask. Maybe that was the desired effect. Maybe this is all encouragement. I think I’ll try my hand at this in the near future. I sure have enough notes now to mash up some fine typographic mess.
You know, speaking of wine, it’s that time. I sure hope that I didn’t drink all of the $5.99 Merlot last night. But, judging by this hangover, I think I did.
Hey, you could do worse things. We all could. But, let’s not.
- Herman S. Goetze, [Taos, New Mexico]
Preface
Short stories. Poems expanded. Novels reduced and miniaturized. Succinct structures that spare the author’s blitheful blathering (if we’re lucky, maybe not). Perfectly sized literary vessels for this hectic, not-much-time-to-spare modern world. Oh, wait, my cell phone is beeping.
Yes, I love the 1500-meter race. I mean, the 1500-word pace. It’s a nice distance. A nice section of the stream.
I really do enjoy composing them so that every word fits just right. An economy of tale. Ok, maybe there are a few misshapen clunkers. And, maybe I leave out just one piece of the puzzle and claim that the forever-staring-at-me dog ate it. I just know that you will find it … and place it into your own teeming morpheme tapestry.
These 49 short stories were printed, copied, and posted online independent of each other. Thus, some characters are explained in brackets and parentheses ad nauseam (e.g., Parkaar, my ailing alias). So very sorry about that.
The history of the mystery. After writing a series of short stories under the still-obscure psecret psociety flag from 2010 through 2015, I decided to lasso up these little literations [sic] and assemble them chronologically into one Old English sheaf.
I hope you enjoy them, and I surreally hope they spark some dormant neurons in your bean. If so, I’ll consider it a successful mission with an anonymous accomplice of the highest order. Well, one never knows; but, two … hmmm.
Acknowledgments
The author would like to duly recognize and sincerely thank the effectible atoms and the spaces between.
“No one likes an extraneous epigraph.”
– Galerie Parcouer