“General, all this has been so terrible for you. Please know that I understand that.”
“I phoned Casey this morning.” He choked back a sob. “I told her that I was sorry I hadn’t welcomed her into our family with open arms. She was remarkably forgiving. I understand now what my son saw in her.”
A few minutes later General Raleigh walked Laurie to the front door. “I want to thank you again for everything your program has done. Nothing can bring back Hunter. But it has made me think. In the years I have remaining, I am going to try to be a better father to Andrew.”
Laurie kissed his cheek and wordlessly went down the steps. She stepped into the waiting car and gave Alex’s address.
75
Alex answered the door himself. She saw no sign of Ramon. He gave her a quick hug but it felt chilly.
“Thanks for seeing me,” she said.
“Of course,” he said briskly, leading the way to the living room. “Can I get you something?”
She shook her head and took a seat on the sofa, leaving a spot next to her. He sat on a chair across from her instead.
“Alex, I know you said you needed time to think, but the silence is driving me crazy. They say never go to sleep angry. We haven’t spoken in two days.”
“They say that about couples who are married, Laurie. We’re far from that, aren’t we?”
She swallowed. This was going to be even harder than she’d expected. “No, but I thought—”
“You thought that I’d wait for you, however long it took. That’s what I thought, too. But when I needed time—just a few days to think about how you and I might fit together, with our work, with our lives—you couldn’t let me have it. Instead, you’re here, demanding something I’m not sure you even want.”
“I’m not demanding anything, Alex. I’m sorry I pressed so hard about Mark Templeton. You’re right; I should have trusted you when you said to leave it alone. I just want things to go back to how they were before this case.”
“To how they were? And how exactly was that? Where were we, Laurie? What are we now that I’m no longer your host? I’m your dad’s sports buddy, your son’s pal. But what am I to you?”
“You’re—you’re Alex. You’re the only man I’ve met since Greg died who actually makes me wish I could move on.”
“I know this sounds cold, Laurie, but it’s been six years.”
“Please understand that for five of those, I woke up every day in limbo. To even have dinner with another man without knowing who killed Greg would have felt like a betrayal. That’s the space I lived in when you first met me. I’m still learning how to move out of it. But I will, I know I will. I feel myself waking up again. And you’re the one—the only one—who makes me want to do that.”
Time seemed to stop while he looked at her in silence. She couldn’t read his expression. She forced herself to breathe.
“I wanted to think it was just a matter of time, Laurie. I really did.”
She couldn’t help but notice that he was using the past tense. No, she thought, please don’t let this happen.
“I was willing to wait as long as it took. But this . . . thing that happened with your show is troubling. I just can’t ignore it. We’ve both been telling ourselves that it’s all going to work out in time, but maybe the problem is that you just don’t trust me.”
“I said I’m sorry. It’s not going to happen again.”
“But you can’t control your own heart, Laurie. Greg was a hero. He saved lives in an emergency room. You were his one true love. Then you had Timmy to make you a family. And I’ve seen how you worship your father, too, who’s also one of the good guys. He fights crime and helps victims. And that’s what you do now with your show. But who am I? Just some lonely bachelor who makes a living as a hired gun, defending the guilty.”
“That’s not true—”
He shook his head. “I certainly don’t think so, but you do. Admit it, Laurie: you’ll never admire me, not like Greg. So you can keep telling yourself you’re trying to move on. But you won’t. Not until you find the right person, and then it will just happen. It will be effortless. But this?” He gestured between the two of them. “This has been nothing but effort.”
“What are you saying?”
“I care for you deeply. I loved you deeply. I probably still do. But I can’t wait in the wings forever. Now I think it’s time for us to stop trying. I’m letting you go.”
“But I don’t want that.”
Alex let out a sad laugh. “That’s not how the whole ‘if you love someone, set them free’ thing works, Laurie. You don’t get a say in this. If you ever feel like you’re truly ready to be with me, let me know and maybe we’ll go from there. But that’s not going to be today, or tomorrow, or next week.”
In other words, he was done waiting.
When he hugged her at the door, it felt like good-bye.
No, Laurie thought, as she stepped into the elevator. This is not the end of this story. I’m ready to live again—not in limbo, but freely and happily, the way Greg would want me to. Alex is the one I want to share my life with, and I’ll find a way to prove that to him.
• • •
Alex was about to pour gin into a metal shaker when Ramon emerged from his room. Shooing Alex out of the way, he stepped in to take over.
“Your martinis are always better than mine,” Alex said gratefully.
“I couldn’t help but notice that you were smiling,” Ramon observed. “Did everything go well?”
Alex knew that causing Laurie pain now was the price to be paid for the future.
“This has been a tough case, Ramon,” Alex said, as he reached for the glass Ramon set in front of him. “But I just gave a good summation, and I believe the jury’s going to decide in our favor.”
Check out the whole Under Suspicion series by Queen of Suspense Mary Higgins Clark and Alafair Burke, and be sure to look for Mary Higgins Clark's next standalone novel, All by Myself, Alone, in Spring 2017
In a first-time collaboration, Queen of Suspense Mary Higgins Clark partners with bestselling author Alafair Burke to deliver a brand new suspense series about a television program featuring cold case murders.
The Cinderella Murder
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Laurie Moran sets out to investigate the case of a missing bride—five years ago, Amanda Pierce was excitedly preparing to marry her college sweetheart in a lavish ceremony. Then, with their guests and families on site, Amanda vanished.
All Dressed in White
* * *
Coming in Spring 2017, a glamorous cruise on a luxurious ocean liner turns deadly in the latest mystery from Queen of Suspense and #1 New York Times bestselling author Mary Higgins Clark.
All by Myself, Alone
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Photograph © Bernard Vidal
The #1 New York Times bestselling author MARY HIGGINS CLARK has written thirty-six suspense novels, four collections of short stories, a historical novel, a memoir, and two children’s books. With her daughter Carol Higgins Clark, she has coauthored five more suspense novels, and also wrote The Cinderella Murder and All Dressed in White with bestselling author Alafair Burke. More than one hundred million copies of her books are in print in the United States alone. Her books are international bestsellers.
© Deborah Copaken
ALAFAIR BURKE is the New York Times bestselling author of eleven novels, including The Ex, Long Gone, and the Ellie Hatcher series. A former prosecutor and a graduate of Stanford Law School, she now teaches criminal law and lives in Manhattan.
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bsp; BY MARY HIGGINS CLARK
As Time Goes By
The Melody Lingers On
Death Wears a Beauty Mask
I’ve Got You Under My Skin
Daddy’s Gone A Hunting
The Lost Years
The Magical Christmas Horse (Illustrated by Wendell Minor)
I’ll Walk Alone
The Shadow of Your Smile
Just Take My Heart
Where Are You Now?
Ghost Ship (Illustrated by Wendell Minor)
I Heard That Song Before
Two Little Girls in Blue
No Place Like Home
Nighttime Is My Time
The Second Time Around
Kitchen Privileges
Mount Vernon Love Story
Silent Night/All Through the Night
Daddy’s Little Girl
On The Street Where You Live
Before I Say Good-Bye
We’ll Meet Again
All Through the Night
You Belong to Me
Pretend You Don’t See Her
My Gal Sunday
Moonlight Becomes You
Silent Night
Let Me Call You Sweetheart
The Lottery Winner
Remember Me
I’ll Be Seeing You
All Around the Town
Loves Music, Loves to Dance
The Anastasia Syndrome and Other Stories
While My Pretty One Sleeps
Weep No More, My Lady
Stillwatch
A Cry in the Night
The Cradle Will Fall
A Stranger Is Watching
Where Are the Children?
BY MARY HIGGINS CLARK AND CAROL HIGGINS CLARK
Dashing Through the Snow
Santa Cruise
The Christmas Thief
He Sees You When You’re Sleeping
Deck the Halls
BY MARY HIGGINS CLARK AND ALAFAIR BURKE
All Dressed in White
The Cinderella Murder
BY ALAFAIR BURKE
The Ex
If You Were Here
Long Gone
THE ELLIE HATCHER SERIES
All Day and a Night
Never Tell
212
Angel’s Tip
Dead Connection
THE SAMANTHA KINCAID SERIES
Close Case
Missing Justice
Judgment Calls
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ISBN 978-1-5011-0858-7
ISBN 978-1-5011-0860-0 (ebook)