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    TBH, No One Can EVER Know

    Page 4
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    How are u always so in touch w/ people

      Ur like a psychic therapist mastermind genius or something

      CECILY

      LOL that is a lot of things, Pri

      PRIANKA

      So true, tho

      CECILY

      IDK I just get a sense that Vic really struggles with it even though she doesn’t talk about it much

      GABRIELLE

      Yeah

      Maybe she’ll wanna talk about it one day

      CECILY

      K this side chat is getting too gossipy

      PRIANKA

      Love how you started it, Cece, and now you’re putting the kibosh

      GABRIELLE

      Lol kibosh

      Such a funny word

      PRIANKA

      Wanna know another word I love

      CECILY

      Ya

      PRIANKA

      Lackluster

      Isn’t that a good one

      CECILY

      So good

      I love words

      PRIANKA

      Me too duh

      GABRIELLE

      K guys this has been fun

      PRIANKA

      I gotta get ready for Jennie’s w/ Vishal

      GABRIELLE

      Oooh have fun

      LOVE YA

      PRIANKA

      Thanks! Mwah

      CECILY

      Mwah mwah mwah

      HAVE SO MUCH FUN

      Squad 4 Life

      VICTORIA

      U guyssssss

      Since I had to leave early and I missed the dance planning meeting the other day, I emailed Mr. C about how I think it should be a fundraiser for St. Francis

      GABRIELLE

      OMGGGGGGG sooo glad you wrote him

      Vic that is

      VICTORIA

      And party company will donate stuff

      CECILY

      Yessssss

      CECILY

      Love how you’re so pumped up, Vic

      VICTORIA

      Yaaayyyyyyy

      To: Victoria Melford

      From: Edward Carransey

      Subject: RE: Valentine’s Day Dance

      Dear Victoria,

      What an incredible idea! I am thrilled you’re taking initiative with the dance! We can most certainly make it a fundraiser for St. Francis. Let’s discuss in more depth next week.

      Thank you very much,

      Mr. C

      *sent from my iPhone. Please excuse typos*

      Gabrielle, Mom

      GABRIELLE

      Hi, Mom

      MOM

      Hi

      Why are we texting when we are sitting on the same couch?

      GABRIELLE

      It’s fun

      MOM

      Ok

      Hi

      GABRIELLE

      Can u take me shopping for a dress for Ethan’s wedding

      GABRIELLE

      I know I just got new dresses for bat mitzvahs

      But please

      MOM

      Let me think about it

      Maybe we will split and you will use half of your dog walking $

      GABRIELLE

      That could be good

      Also

      Can we look into me volunteering at YAS

      MOM

      YAS?

      GABRIELLE

      Yorkville Animal Shelter

      MOM

      Oh!

      Sure!

      GABRIELLE

      Could be great for me right?

      MOM

      Definitely

      Love to see you taking an interest in something

      GABRIELLE

      Such a mom comment

      MOM

      I am a mom LOL LOL

      GABRIELLE

      Hahahahah

      GABRIELLE

      Ok coming to snuggle

      MOM

      Squad 4 Life

      PRIANKA

      You guysssssss

      Jennie’s w/ Vishal was soooo much fun

      CECILY

      Yayyyyyyy that is soo sooooo great

      GABRIELLE

      PRI!!!!

      GABRIELLE

      First date!!!!

      VICTORIA

      WOOOO

      Deleting this text chain

      BRB

      No talk of dates for Mama Melford to snoop on

      PRIANKA

      K

      Done

      From: Gabrielle Katz

      To: Yorkville Animal Shelter

      Subject: volunteering

      Dear Yorkville Animal Shelter:

      I wanted to find out about volunteer programs for middle school kids. I love dogs and I want to help. Please get back to me.

      Thank you,

      Gabrielle Katz

      Victoria, Mom

      VICTORIA

      Mom

      I am begging you

      Please don’t go nuts about the Valentine’s Day dance

      Normal for kids to take dates & it’s totally innocent

      And it’s not like everyone is taking dates

      I mean most kids are not

      I am begging you

      MOM

      Victoria, I will do what I think is right

      MOM

      This is not your concern

      VICTORIA

      It is my concern

      It’s a FUNDRAISER for ST. FRANCIS

      And Edward is donating all this stuff from the party company

      I thought of asking him all on my own

      I really took initiative

      I really care about this

      I’m really involved in the dance

      Please listen to me

      Please let me go

      MOM

      Victoria. Stop.

      VICTORIA

      I feel like what happened when I was 4 @ the mall has spooked you for life and now you can’t function like a normal person

      You can never face it

      And it is ruining your life

      And my life, too

      MOM

      Enough

      Get your coat

      Time for school

      Squad 4 Life

      VICTORIA

      Guys

      I need to call an emergency meeting

      Not at my house, tho

      Where can we meet after school

      My mom is letting me go to friends’ houses again

      FINALLY THANK THE LORD

      Get back to me asap please

      Need to use special secret shared notebook

      VICTORIA

      Let’s call it SSSNB

      Where r u guyssssss

      From: Cecily Anderson

      To: Gabrielle Katz, Victoria Melford, Prianka Basak

      Subject: Today

      Hi! Vic, I saw the texts but couldn’t respond so I’m moving this to email and hopefully you all check in study hall today. Don’t want to bring up at lunch in case it’s super emotional and private.

      Anyway, do you want to come over to my house? We can meet after school. My mom has a meeting and Ingrid has lacrosse tryouts.

      Write back or just show up! Or drop me a locker note to say you’re coming!

      Xoxox Cece

      See you after school! No time to email. Xo Pri

      I’m coming over! Woo! So much to discuss. Xoxoxoxoxoxoxox GABS!

      Thanks for having us over. Love, Vic

      Hi guys, thanks for all meeting at Cece’s. I’m really having serious issues with some stuff and I haven’t been open about it and I wonder if there are things going on with you, too, that you haven’t been open about. I think we can all be honest about this. I don’t want to make this a Struggle Journal but maybe it will turn into that. I’ve been realizing that I suffer alone a lot of the time but I don’t want to. I want to lean on others and get help. So that’s why I called this emergency meeting. I want to write about my problems and then I hope you guys respond and then you can write about yours maybe and then we can all be honest and rely on one another. Sound OK? OK!

      I am freaking out over things with my mom. She seems to want to derail all things and
    keep me locked up like a baby. I’m such a good person, rule follower, get good grades, all of that. And yet she barely wants me to go out, and she’s already freaking out over the Valentine’s Day Dance even with all of my hard work. I mean, I’m getting a free photo booth and ARCADE GAMES! HOW AWESOME IS THAT? And what if I can’t even enjoy it?!?

      I think deep down she is always afraid!!! That’s why she yelled at everyone at sledding and made such a scene. IT WAS THE WORST.

      Why is my mom like this??? Why can’t she be like your moms???

      I don’t know what to do. I just really, really want to take some action. I feel like I am missing my whole life.

      Passing to Cece now. Love, Vic

      * * *

      First of all, Vic, I think this is super brave of you. We do need to lean on each other and you have a lot going on in your head and it’s not healthy to keep it all in. I struggle with feeling the need to be perfect. You guys all know that. And also the whole thing about liking girls and not being totally sure where to go with it. It just feels like I’m alone in that and it’s something that will get easier with time. I’m not really sure.

      But enough about me.

      Vic, I wonder if you could ever talk to your dad about this stuff. Have you tried? I know it can be awkward with dads but maybe it can work? And if not, I wonder if the school psychologist or your guidance counselor can help. Sometimes it helps to get other people involved. Just a few ideas. Passing to Gabs. LOVE YOU ALL FOREVER AND EVER, Cece

      * * *

      Hi! OK, so you know my main stuff so I won’t bore you with that again. Obv the ADHD thing and my school frustrations and all of that. But also it’s more. I want to find my passion and I have been working on that and I may have found it but stay tuned and also enough about me. I think that we need to try and get your mom to be more social with our moms. I think it’ll really help. Can we plan a brunch or dinner or something very soon? Before the dance? And then all the moms can talk to your mom and maybe help her relax a little? Great idea, right??? Passing to Pri. Xoxo Gabs

      * * *

      Hiiiiiii, LOVIES!!! Well obvs I have no worries at all because I’m Prianka Basak the extraordinary and a poetry champion so yeah. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! JK! Of course I have problems. DUH. WE ALL DO. Which is why I’m obsessed with this journal and putting it all out there, maybe in poetry form. HAHA. JK again! See, I am trying to bring the humor here!

      OK, anyway. I love Gabs’s idea and I think we need to do it right away. I love that you’re reaching out to us, Vic, and love that we can all be honest about our stuff and I love our friendship and I LOVE ALL OF YOU SOOOOO MUCH! SMOOCHES FOREVER, Pri

      * * *

      Hi! So what if my mom sends an email to everyone? Mama Anderson is good @ organizing.

      * * *

      Wait!!! We can’t let my mom know that we are sort of forcing it on her. We need to make it seem like a normal plan somehow that she drops me off at, and then maybe they encourage her to stay? I don’t know. She doesn’t like forced things. UGH SHE DOESN’T SEEM TO LIKE ANYTHING. WAHHHHH.

      * * *

      Good point, Vic. We don’t want her to feel awk and then not even come.

      * * *

      Agree. Maybe we all get ready for the dance together and the moms come? But if you’re not allowed to go to the dance that won’t work.

      * * *

      Maybe we can all go out for ice cream together after a PTA meeting when we are presenting since we know Mama Melford goes to those!

      * * *

      Genius!! We won’t plan it. Just pray it happens after PTA meeting.

      Cecily, Mom

      CECILY

      Mom?

      Are you there

      MOM

      Hi

      Yes

      Downstairs

      CECILY

      Can we text

      MOM

      Um, sure. Why, though?

      CECILY

      Don’t want Dad to weigh in and make jokes

      MOM

      Ok

      CECILY

      Can you help me with Vic’s mom?

      MOM

      What’s going on?

      I’d really prefer to discuss this face-to-face

      CECILY

      MOMMMMMMMM

      MOM

      OK, come down and discuss, please

      CECILY

      Fine

      Bye

      From: Yorkville Animal Shelter

      To: Gabrielle Katz

      Subject: RE: volunteering

      Hello, Ms. Katz!

      We’d be thrilled to have you volunteer. Normally our volunteers are 18+ but we have had a great deal of interest from middle schoolers and so we are starting a middle school volunteer program. It meets on Saturdays from 3-5 and it can fulfill school community service requirements, although we are not saying you are doing it for that reason. :)

      Please let us know when you would like to begin. You can email back, call, or stop by the shelter.

      Puppy love!

      Marren Fleetis

      Director, Yorkville Animal Shelter

      From: Gabrielle Katz

      To: Yorkville Animal Shelter

      Subject: volunteering

      Dear Yorkville Animal Shelter:

      I wanted to find out about volunteer programs for middle school kids. I love dogs and I want to help. Please get back to me.

      Thank you,

      Gabrielle Katz

      Squad 4 Life

      GABRIELLE

      Guys

      Guess what

      Yorkville Animal Shelter has a middle school kids volunteer program on Saturdays & I’m gonna do it! Anyone wanna do it with me

      PASSION ALERT

      I think I wanna be a vet when I grow up

      CECILY

      Wooo so awesome, Gabs

      GABRIELLE

      Feeling pumped

      CECILY

      WOOOOO TO ALL

      PRIANKA

      New life motto

      “Woo to all!”

      CECILY

      Love it

      K bye

      GABRIELLE

      Mwah

      PRIANKA

      Mwah

      From: Cecily Anderson

      To: Edward Carransey

      Subject: New Initiative

      Dear Mr. Carransey,

      I stopped by your office earlier but you were in a meeting. I want to start something new. I had to check with my mom first, though.

      It’s called SOCIAL MEDIA FOR GOOD AND NOT FOR EVIL. Everyone will sign a pledge that they vow to use social media in a different way. It won’t be for leaving people out or bullying someone or anything like that. The situation with the viral video of Marisa (#MaRIPa) was horrible. I know Jared got in trouble and was suspended for a week but we need to really take it a step further.

      It seems like it all started with the whole thing with Sami and the ranking and the #broboom thing and now the video. Social media has become toxic to the extreme. I really want to make this change. Please let me know what you think.

      Thank you, Cecily Anderson

      I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.

      —Louisa May Alcott

      Dear Journal,

      I realized something. I only turn to you when I’m upset and that’s not fair. Maybe it’s because I take the good stuff for granted and I don’t write it down. Or maybe it’s because the bad stuff always feels more important. But anyway, I need to turn to you when I feel good, too. And guess what? Today I feel good! I think I’ve finally found my passion: animals! Dogs, specifically. And I get to volunteer at the Yorkville Animal Shelter on Saturdays. It’s gonna be great. Plus my friends and I are really all getting along right now and we’re trying to help Victoria with her issues with her mom. I feel like I need to pause and appreciate this moment. Thank you for all of your support. ;) Xoxo Gabs

      My Loves

      VICTORIA

      GUYSSSSSSS

      OMG

      I know it is late but Cece, my mom just got off the phone wi
    th your mom and they talked for an hour!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      I didn’t even know she was calling!!

      CECILY

      OMG

      I didn’t know for sure either but they talk sometimes at PTA meetings sooo . . .

      I was eavesdropping, too

      VICTORIA

      Since we are going to the PTA meeting to talk about the dance my mom said OK to ice cream after

      CECILY

      THIS IS HUGE,

      VICTORIA

      I KNOW

      SOOOOO excited

      GABRIELLE

      Wait!!! When is this happening??

      CECILY

      Monday

      GABRIELLE

      Oh, I forgot dance committee is going to PTA meeting to discuss plans

      PRIANKA

      This is community service, too, LOL

      GABRIELLE

      CECILY

      K great

      VICTORIA

      U GUYS

      I am soooo excited my mom agreed

      PRIANKA

      WOO TO ALL

      CECILY

      WOO TO ALL

      GABRIELLE

      WOO TO ALL

      VICTORIA

      LOL WOO TO ALL

      From: Cecily Anderson

      To: Prianka Basak, Gabrielle Katz, Victoria Melford

      Subject: MISSION FOR ICE CREAM DATE

      Hi, guys!

      Sorry for all caps in subject line but I am just soooooo excited and can’t keep chill in study hall!!!!

      OK, so goals:

      Get Vic’s mom to chill out re: dance and date and all other kids growing up stuff

      Get moms to stop snooping (prob not gonna accomplish this in one night but worth a try!)

      HANG OUT & HAVE SO MUCH FUN

      EAT ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      I AM SOOOOOOO EXCITED.

      xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxo Cece

      From: Edward Carransey

      To: Cecily Anderson

      Subject: RE: New Initiative

      Dear Cecily,

     


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