Also by Kristin Levine
The Best Bad Luck I Ever Had
The Lions of Little Rock
The Paper Cowboy
G. P. PUTNAM’S SONS
an imprint of Penguin Random House LLC
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Copyright © 2018 by Kristin Levine.
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Ebook ISBN 9780698193987
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Jacket art © 2018 by Tom Froese
Jacket design by Tony Sahara
Version_1
For Charlotte and Kara
Contents
Also by Kristin Levine
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Part 1: The PieceNote To Reader
Email
Phone Transcript
Text Message
Note To Reader
Email
Phone Transcript
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Phone Transcript
Voice Memo
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Surveillance Video Transcript
Email
Mail
Email
Phone Transcript
Voice Memo
Yearbook
Email
Note To Reader
Email
Note To Reader
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Text Message
Note To Reader
Email
Directions
Text Message
Video Transcript
Email
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Mail
Part 2: The PuzzleEmail
Phone Transcript
Text Message
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Receipt
Email
Text Message
Note To Reader
Receipt
Phone Transcript
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Mail
Puzzle
Email
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Directions
Receipt
Email
Voice Memo
Text Message
Note To Reader
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Email
Video Transcript
Voice Memo
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Puzzle
Email
Text Message
Receipt
Video Transcript
Voice Memo
Receipt
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Voice Memo
Email
Puzzle
Text Message
Directions
Receipt
Video Transcript
Email
Phone Transcript
Voice Memo
Note To Reader
Playlist
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Email
Video Transcript
Puzzle
Email
Text Message
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Voice Memo
Email
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Puzzle
Text Message
Note To Reader
Phone Transcript
Voice Memo
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Email
Note To Reader
Mini Golf Scorecard
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Email
Email
Video Transcript
Puzzle
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Text Message
Text Message
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Informercial Transcript
Note To Reader
Email
Part 3: The Big PictureNote To Reader
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Email
Text Message
Puzzle
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Time Capsule
Video Transcript
Time Capsule
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Voice Memo
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Voice Memo
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Phone Transcript
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Text Message
Note To Reader
Time Capsule
Note To Reader
Note To Reader
Online Chat Transcript
Phone Transcript
Email
Email
Phone Transcript
Directions
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Receipt
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Phone Transcript
Puzzle
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Text Message
Voice Memo
Email
Video Transcript
Playlist
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Receipt
Video Transcript
Phone Transcript
Note To Reader
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Voice Memo
Note To Reader
Text Message
Note To Reader
Email
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Text Message
Video Transcript
Note To Reader
Author’s Note
Acknowledgments
PART 1
The Piece
NOTE TO READER
I USED TO THINK that life was like a puzzle, and if I was organized and worked really hard, I could make all the pieces fit neatly together.
Turns out, I was wrong.
This scrapbook tells the story of how I learned that. It’s full of emails and phone conversations, receipts and flyers. Transcripts of old home movies that I typed up. It’s the story of how we lost my dad and how we found him again, all organized in a binder with headings and labels, colored tabs and archival scrapbooking tape.
Because, if you ask me, there’s nothing like a good list to make you feel calm and in control. Guess I’m just weird that way. I needed to put this all in one place, to see how the clues and pieces all came together to reveal the truth about me and my family.
And if there’s only one thing you learn about me from this collection of documents (and I hope there’s not just one, but if there is just one), it’s this:
I really do love a good puzzle.
Claudia Dalton
EMAIL
From: Jeffery Dalton <jeffdalton327@gmail.com>
Date: Friday, June 26, 2015 4:55 PM EST
To: Claudia Dalton <claudiadalton195@gmail.com>, Jennifer Dalton <jennydalton431@gmail.com>
Subject: Will be home late
My favorite girls,
Something came up while I was at work. Not quite sure when I’ll be home. Don’t wait up!
Love you both,
Dad
PHONE TRANSCRIPT
Claudia Dalton’s Cell Phone | Friday, June 26, 2015, 5:03 p.m.
Mom: Hello?
Claudia: Dad said he had to work late. When are you going to be home?
Mom: Um, might be 7:30.
Claudia: But Dad was going to drive Kate and me to the movies! It starts at 7:30.
Mom: Do you mind missing the previews?
Claudia: Yes. And I can’t sit in the front row because you know I get a crick in my neck.
Mom: Well, I’m sorry, Claudia, but my big conference is in ten days and . . . Why can’t Dad take you? I thought this was his last teacher workday before summer vacation.
Claudia: I don’t know. He just emailed that something came up.
Claudia: She has a project she’s trying to finish before she goes on maternity leave.
Mom: That’s right! When’s the baby due?
Claudia: Couple of weeks.
Mom: Give her my best.
Claudia: Okay. But what about the movies?
Mom: I can pick you up afterward, but—
Claudia: It’s fine, Mom. We’ll walk.
Mom: Sorry, sweetie. Text me when you’re done.
Claudia: Will do.
Mom: Love you!
Claudia: Love you too. Bye.
TEXT MESSAGE
Claudia Dalton’s Cell Phone | Friday, June 26, 2015, 5:11 p.m.
KATE
Hey, BFF?
Sup
Itsy-bitsy change in plans
What?
How do you feel about walking?
Claudia!
Sorry
My dad flaked
Mom working late
Ugh. Mine too
Could your dad . . .
Haha
You know he’s never home before 8
So we walk?
Yup
Meet at your place? 6:30?
See you then
NOTE TO READER
WHEN I WOKE up the next morning something felt wrong, but I didn’t know what it was. I walked into the kitchen and put some bread into the toaster. I got the paper from the front porch and glanced at the headlines: “Gays’ right to wed affirmed,” “For Obama, a day of triumph, grief and grace,” “Dozens killed in terror attacks on 3 continents.” (Why did we still get the paper anyway? Couldn’t my parents read it online like everybody else?!) I smeared peanut butter and jelly on my toast.
And then I saw it. My father’s favorite mug. The one he used for tea every morning. Sitting on the counter, clean and untouched.
EMAIL
From: Claudia Dalton <claudiadalton195@gmail.com>
Date: Saturday, June 27, 2015 10:30 AM EST
To: Jeffery Dalton <jeffdalton327@gmail.com>
Subject: Where are you?!
Dad,
Why didn’t you come home last night?!!!
I’m really freaking out. Did you drop your phone in the toilet again? Did you have a car accident? Did you run away to join the circus?!
Mom says she’s sure there’s some really lame, normal explanation. Like maybe you went bowling with the young teachers from school and had too many beers and decided to crash on someone’s couch and you thought you’d texted us, but there was no signal in the bowling alley and you didn’t notice the message had failed to send. Even though I’ve shown you about 500 times how to check it.
But I think she’s lying because Mom spent all morning scrubbing the kitchen floor. You know Mom. Unless we’re having a party, she only cleans when she’s angry or nervous.
Anyway, call us!!!
Love, Claudia
PHONE TRANSCRIPT
Claudia Dalton’s Cell Phone | Saturday, June 27, 2015, 2:14 p.m.
Mom: Hello—
Claudia: Mom, has he called?
Mom: No. Are you still at the pool with Kate?
Claudia: Yeah. They invited me to stay for dinner too.
Mom: Okay. That’s fine.
Claudia: Have you called the police yet?
Mom: Yes, Claudia. They said we have to wait twenty-four hours before filling out a missing persons report.
Claudia: Oh.
Mom: Wait, I’m getting another call!
Claudia: Is it Dad?
Mom: No. No, it’s your grandfather. I called him earlier.
Clau
dia: That means you think it is serious!
Mom: I’m just covering all the bases.
Claudia: But, Mom . . .
Mom: I’ll let you know if I hear anything. I gotta go.
PHONE TRANSCRIPT
Jenny Dalton’s Cell Phone | Saturday, June 27, 2015, 2:16 p.m.
Mom: Have you heard anything, Walter?
Papa: No, I was just checking in with you.
Mom: Oh.
Papa: This is so strange. Was Jeff having any problems?
Mom: No.
Papa: You don’t sound certain.
Mom: Well, he was acting a little distant lately. But I thought that was because of Lily. I thought it was normal.
Papa: Grief is normal. Disappearing is not.
Mom: I know. I need to call some more friends and . . .
Papa: Let me know if you hear anything.
Mom: I will.
NOTE TO READER
EARLY SUNDAY MORNING, so early it was still dark, I woke up and couldn’t fall back asleep. When I went into the kitchen for some breakfast, I found Mom already there.
She was sitting at the kitchen table, picking slips of paper out of a Mason jar. I knew what they were: messages my father had left in my lunch.
Have a great first day of school!
Good luck on your science test.
Break a leg in your history skit!
Dad had put notes in my lunch for years, not every day, but a couple times a week. I always brought them home and stuffed them into the jar as I cleaned out my lunch box.
At least I had until a few months ago. Billy Peterson had caught me reading one, snatched it out of my hand, and spent the rest of the day repeating, “I love you, sweetie! Have an amazing day!” in a fake, high-pitched voice. I’d marched home and told Dad I was too old for notes in my lunch anymore.
I felt awful about that now. Had I hurt Dad’s feelings? Was he mad at me? Mom and I pulled note after note out of the Mason jar until they covered the kitchen table.
When we were done, Mom finally admitted that she was worried too. She cooked breakfast, eggs that neither of us ate, and we filled out the missing persons report together. I looked through my phone and found three current photos of Dad to give to the police. I also found the following video, in case they wanted to put it on TV or anything.