Five minutes in that tub just about ruined me. Never mind the rattlesnake poison, I was worried about dying of cleanliness! I took it as long as I could, and then I said to myself, “I’ve got to get out of here.”
I jumped out of the tub and tried to shake all that stuff off. Guess I throwed water everywhere, got Sally May so agitated that she yelled, “Get him out of here before he ruins the wallpaper!”
That was music to my ears. Loper pitched me out the back door. “Hank, I don’t know how you do it, but I think you could find a way to screw up a bowl of ice cream.”
I didn’t hang around for steak and eggs. I jumped the fence and made a wild dash into that nice green pool of water. I flew into it.
And oh, it was so nice! How I love sewer water! It soothed me, it healed me, it brought back my deep manly smell. I give those healing waters full credit for counteracting snake venom. It saved my life.
Well, I was rolling around in the water when Drover came along. “Oh Hank, I thought we’d lost you. Boy, am I glad to see you alive!”
“Alive and well, Drover. It takes more than a gallon of rattlesnake venom to put me out of commission.”
“A whole gallon, no fooling?”
“Yes sir, injected directly into my juggling vein.”
“Gosh, it’s a miracle you survived. I almost died of fright, just watching.”
“It’s all in a day’s work, Drover—fighting snakes, cheating death, courting women.” I climbed out on dry land and gave myself a shake. “Now we’d better head for the gas tanks and get some shut-eye. In another three-four hours it’ll be dark, and you know what that means.”
Drover rolled his eyes around. “What does that mean, Hank?”
“Strange sounds in the night, creepy-crawly things, monsters, murders, another case for us to crack. There’s no end to it, Drover.”
We trotted over to the gas tanks and found our gunnysack beds just as we had left them. I fluffed mine up, walked around it three times, and flopped down. In seconds, I was asleep and dreaming about a big juicy bone.
“Hank?”
“Huh?”
“How come I can’t quit thinking about Beulah?”
I cracked one eye. “It’s a bad habit. It shows poor training and a lack of discipline. We don’t have time for that nonsense. Now go to sleep.”
“Okay.” There was a moment of silence, then, “Hank, do you ever dream about Beulah?”
“I used to, but not anymore. She chose Plato and I’m finished with her, forever. Go to sleep.”
At last he was quiet. I drifted off to sleep again and went looking for that same juicy bone I’d been working on. I was floating along when all at once I saw . . .
Gosh, she was pretty, the long collie nose, the deep brown eyes, the long flaxen hair . . .
Further Reading
Have you read all of Hank’s adventures?
1 The Original Adventures of Hank the Cowdog
2 The Further Adventures of Hank the Cowdog
3 It’s a Dog’s Life
4 Murder in the Middle Pasture
5 Faded Love
6 Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
7 The Curse of the Incredible Priceless Corncob
8 The Case of the One-Eyed Killer Stud Horse
9 The Case of the Halloween Ghost
10 Every Dog Has His Day
11 Lost in the Dark Unchanted Forest
12 The Case of the Fiddle-Playing Fox
13 The Wounded Buzzard on Christmas Eve
14 Hank the Cowdog and Monkey Business
15 The Case of the Missing Cat
16 Lost in the Blinded Blizzard
17 The Case of the Car-Barkaholic Dog
18 The Case of the Hooking Bull
19 The Case of the Midnight Rustler
20 The Phantom in the Mirror
21 The Case of the Vampire Cat
23 Moonlight Madness
24 The Case of the Black-Hooded Hangmans
25 The Case of the Swirling Killer Tornado
26 The Case of the Kidnapped Collie
27 The Case of the Night-Stalking Bone Monster
28 The Mopwater Files
29 The Case of the Vampire Vacuum Sweeper
30 The Case of the Haystack Kitties
31 The Case of the Vanishing Fishhook
32 The Garbage Monster from Outer Space
33 The Case of the Measled Cowboy
34 Slim’s Good-bye
35 The Case of the Saddle House Robbery
36 The Case of the Raging Rottweiler
37 The Case of the Deadly Ha-Ha Game
38 The Fling
39 The Secret Laundry Monster Files
40 The Case of the Missing Bird Dog
41 The Case of the Shipwrecked Tree
42 The Case of the Burrowing Robot
43 The Case of the Twisted Kitty
44 The Dungeon of Doom
45 The Case of the Falling Sky
46 The Case of the Tricky Trap
47 The Case of the Tender Cheeping Chickies
48 The Case of the Monkey Burglar
49 The Case of the Booby-Trapped Pickup
50 The Case of the Most Ancient Bone
51 The Case of the Blazing Sky
52 The Quest for the Great White Quail
53 Drover’s Secret Life
54 The Case of the Dinosaur Birds
55 The Case of the Secret Weapon
56 The Case of the Coyote Invasion
57 The Disappearance of Drover
58 The Case of the Mysterious Voice
About the Author and Illustrator
John R. Erickson, a former cowboy, has written numerous books for both children and adults and is best known for his acclaimed Hank the Cowdog series. He lives and works on his ranch in Perryton, Texas, with his family.
Gerald L. Holmes has illustrated numerous cartoons and textbooks in addition to the Hank the Cowdog series. He lives in Perryton, Texas.