CHAPTER ONE
I am the rising sun, the son of infinity
I am the only one who won the sea;
When your search is done, come to me
When your wisdom is none, come to see
To anyone, the sight from me
To anyone, the light is free;
So come to me, run—
Everyone
And you shall see
Wisdom is free
In the sea
Of the
Rising
Sun
The stars became visible
Again
An infinite rush,
The voice was gone
I sat
For a moment
Sifting sand and memories—
Cool in the night
I arose
Looking away from the stars
To the desert in front
And all around
I moved on
In thought
Thinking about the voice
"Riddles
As I push through the sea
Frustrating
As I track through the sand
Taunting
As I search for the sun
The voice—
Riddles that
Cry to me
As I wade through the rivers of sorrow
Sing to me
As I dance through the clouds of joy
Mourn to me
As I struggle through the oceans of hate
Bring to me wisdom
As I search for the sun
Yet—how dark my eyes
The voice—
Its shadow rises free from the deep
To fall upon this page of life
To become another scratch
In the world of infinity—
It rushes forth from the movement
Of my soul
It throws its wisdom
laughingly at the world
It rolls in its laughter
And wallows in its glory
It embraces my sorrow
And glories the more
It embraces my gladness
And glories the most
If only
I could be the poet"
I thought
As I crested another dune
"To bring forth my own failures
My own triumphs"
I stopped, a moment,
To breathe slower
I looked again
For the garden—
Through straining eyes,
All was dark but the stars
And ripples of moonlight
"If only it were I were the poet
Instead of the pen—
The thought
Instead of the ink"
The voice
Within and without
Was always with me—
A stranger,
A poet in my soul
And my world
"You are the life and I the rock
You the wind and I the sand"
Silently,
Inwardly,
I smiled
I began walking the crest
Below
I saw a set of tracks
Dying in the sand
I slid down the crest
To follow them
"Yes-
The voice is my master
Sounding my depths
Without my will,
But
The day is near"
I thought jubilantly,
"And soon
I will be the master
Free
And truly
Of the power"
I continued on
Following,
Tracking tracks tracking the sun
I breathed out
Heavily
As I trudged up
The next dune
The tracks
Trailed to the crest, over
And out of sight
The sand slid
As I topped the crest,
In the distance
I could discern
The peaks of mountains
"So,
Here is the new garden"
I thought
I followed the tracks
Down the dune
And continued my journey
Toward the mountains
I knew that a new garden
Meant
New lands
New adventures
New cultures
New people
New friends and enemies
(The way of relativity)
But more importantly
I knew from prophecies
That this garden meant
The end of my search
In the world as I knew it
As the mountains became larger
With my approach
I could see a jungle to the right of them—
Miles of stretching green
Ominous and dark
"Yes,
Here is a jungle"
I thought
As I moved on
"A world totally of its own—
Savage
Primitive
Brutal;
Yet,
A world more honest
Than most of the worlds
Made by man
A world in which
Death
Is a means of survival
And not pleasure
Nor sadism
Nor profit
Nor any of the other reasons
That man finds it expedient
To kill another being"
I came to a stop
And scrutinized the fringe
Further down
I could see the rolling
Of the hills and plains
Continuing and composing
Completely
The horizon
I looked Back
Toward the mountains
And moved On
Soon
The dunes became smaller—
They began to level
Smoothing,
Calming to meet the jungle
Moving
Step upon step
Upon the desert sands
Became easier
As the dunes dwindled
And the sand became more firmly packed
Searching ahead
I could see
Leafy vegetation
Trees and vines
Intertwining
The ominous foliage
Forever distant
"What was that?"
I squinted my eyes
And peered further into the dark
Near the jungle—
I thought I saw
Something white
And fluttering
I,
The searcher
Stood looking
It seemed
As if
A signal,
Or perhaps
It was a white leopard
In curiosity
I turned my path
Toward the white
"I have never seen
Before
An animal of the jungle
Standing silent
Upon the fringe
Perhaps someone
Is in distress"
Leaving tracks behind
As I traveled upon
The sands of time
"Being close to the sun
And knowing
The ways of the desert
Perhaps
I can help"
As I came closer
To the jungle
And the fluttering white,
As the moon rose higher
In the dark sky-
Shining beams upon beams
Upon waves and waves
Of sand and foliage,
And as the noises of the jungle—
Insects
Birds
Predator and victim
And others
Became more violent,
Finally
Before me
I could see upon the fringe
Of desert and jungle—
A woman
Merely a woman,
Beautiful
She was standing
Silent
With wind blowing hair
And swaying silk
Like rippling milk in white
I moved silently
Closer
Upon her bosoms
Long dark hair
Undulated softly
In the wind
"Catly closer," I thought
"And see the . . ."
It was then
Again
That the ringing
Intruded
Ever increasing
Silent,
Then soft
The coming of Ad Infinitum
Always present
Never ending—
But forever
The silent sound
I knew
Once again
The voice would set forth
In mental sound
(And subtly disguised)
Words of inner wisdom—
"And
Like the echoing waves of words
Whispering
Upon the oceans of time,
Resounding,
Touching
The edge
Of my mind—
The silent voice of Ad Infinitum
Quiet now
And listen
Hear it"