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    Runaway Odysseus: Collected Poems 2008-2012

    Page 9
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      love that hugs closer

      at the tides –

      and we wonder if we’re

      Ophelia and if this moment,

      this house, these screams

      and these shouts husked

      in the limelight of the dying fire –

      we wonder if this could be

      our Hamlet, the sound

      drowning us down.

      Over The Pencil Breaks

      As a child, I could captain my hand

      steadier than ships through

      the midnight. Forget those

      New England superstitions –

      nighttime is little

      more than a cloudy day.  I wrote

      with jeweler’s hands

      back then, even my

      glasses standing in for

      the magnifying lens.  

      But now my fingers quiver with hunger

      in the waves of hellos and goodbyes.

      The knuckles are a contortionist’s

      soul, collapsing inward into

      a weak and brittle-haired pebble.

      And I know a pebble throws the

      world’s longest shadow like an outfielder

      given the right light.  I know, because

      I lost count of the times I’ve

      been told.  Still, some nights

      I throw my pencil across the room

      longer than that shadow.  

      Even then, though, I refuse to let

      my hands die quicker

      than me.  Because I will only live as

      long as each of

      these ten fingers breathe.

      Jan 18, 2011

      Rorschach Pantoum

      One time I accidentally bit down on my tongue,

      drawing blood in all its shapes and sizes –

      first, as a house, then as an orange

      and it was at such falls that I was an artist,

      drawing blood in all its shapes and sizes –

      whether as swimming elephants or bitten onions

      and it was at such falls that I was an artist

      whose failures served in place of his cunning.

     

      Whether as swimming elephants or bitten onions,

      my art lives in the blood, sweat, and tears I give – I am a man

      whose failures served in place of his cunning

      and whose pains and hardships served as his pen.

      My art lives in the blood, sweat, and tears I give – I am a man

      trying to live inside the imagination

      and whose pains and hardships served as his pen.

      But really, nothing comes close to

     

      trying to live inside the imagination –

      first, as a house, then as an orange.

      But really, nothing comes close to

      one time when I accidentally bit down on my tongue.

      Pantoum – Those Two Years

      For those two years, she never stopped talking.

      She spoke the human tongue, stuck between

      two loves – “I love the art of wishing

      and him with his eyes…it’s like swimming two deep seas.”

      She spoke the human tongue, stuck between

      pushing dreams across the canvas with a pen

      and him with his eyes…it’s like swimming two deep seas.

      There I go, speaking like her again,

     

      pushing dreams across the canvas with a pen,

      wishing on stars that fell like saints years ago.

      There I go, speaking like her again

      with that dreamy smile that never wakes up. Although

      wishing on stars that fell like saints years ago

      is no way to live, it somehow still is

      with that dreamy smile that never wakes up. Although

      me wanting nothing more

     

      is no way to live, it somehow still is

      two loves. I love the art of wishing,

      me wanting nothing more than

      for those two years she never stopped talking.

      Papercut

      Love is the papercut’s sting,

      winning me back to this. If

      it’s just for moments – the pegs

      and gears all groaned awake –

      it’s moments enough. I

      thunderclap the fantastic

      close like a book, watching

      dust fly and thrive from

      the pages. The dreams live on –

      picking at the trash sunbaked

      on the boardwalk.

      The papercut talks as I curve

      my writing hand, breaking

      ground on sonnets that would

      work better as songs I think.

      I blink out words too big for

      my mind. I have a brain for haiku

      thoughts. I guess no space on the

      lifeboat for you, darling. The

      papercut’s already dragging

      me in the waters –

      if only I could swim.

      April 11, 2010

      Papyrus Revolution

      In the streets they whisper screams.

      Reams of yellow pads, all recording

      the words of this revolution.

      This revolution will

      not be trapped in

      the evening news.

      This revolution will

      be scribbled in riddles

      we will not understand

      until ten years from this

      point in time.

      The revolution will be

      Glass muscles already

      beginning to crackle

      and shrink

      beneath the world

      that Atlas

      could never lift

      but we thought we could.

      We thought we could do

      many things – but one

      thing we never thought

      we could do was think

      outside our heads.

      We never thought

      a piece of paper

      could think for us

      like a robot,

      like an origami robot

      we write instructions

      on with pens and pencils

      in hopes it could read itself.

      And they say the world

      is not flat, yet when I look

      across a sheet of fresh paper,

      I can see the world at my

      fingertips and it’s a flat one.

      And it’s a flat one.

      The pencil touches the paper

      like lightning lights the ground,

      burning away the old

      and bringing around the new

      rush.

      The revolution will

      True, a touch of change

      is always needed.

      Like fingers hopping from bar

      to bar on a piano,

      our hands can make sounds

      when we write.

      Each curve and twist of my writing

      hand makes a word, and each

      word makes a certain sound

      when spoken aloud,

      yet each mind that hears it

      will react different.

      The revolution will be written.

      The revolution will be scribbled.

      The ripples are as certain

      as the fact that my writing hand

      will not wobble.

      The revolution will be written.

      Paradelle Per Lei

      I read your name off the page like music.

      I read your name off the page like music.

      Each letter a note that sounds like skipping stones on water.

      Each letter a note that sounds like skipping stones on water.

      I read off the page, skipping like stones on each letter that

      so
    unds your name – note a music like the water.

      I get lost and swept into the corner.

      I get lost and swept into the corner.

      I feel rushed by my trembles, the stutter in my voice.

      I feel rushed by my trembles, the stutter in my voice.

      In by my corner, I lost the rushed feel –

      my voice, the stutters and trembles I get swept into.

      You are all soft smiles and softer eyes.

      You are all soft smiles and softer eyes.

      I grow wings, fly through the blue clouds of your eyes.

      I grow wings, fly through the blue clouds of your eyes.

      Your blue eyes are softer and grow wings.

      You and I fly soft through all the clouds of smiles and eyes.

      You rushed off on your wings, and I

      read your note that sounds like my voice, all a stutter,

      skipping stones through the letter. Each page of

      music and the like all lost. I grow wings,

      fly into the corners in blue-name clouds – the soft smiles are softer.

      I feel my eyes tremble a soft blue, get swept by the water.

      Pecking Order

      Confusion sprang and rang

      amongst the lilies –

      and with the wind

      weaving the dust into

      the setting sun,

      I could taste riot in the air

      for the first time and I liked it.

      I will right this,

      though, to show

      the world I own it,

      but know this,

      that I do so with

      the most utter

      of reluctance.

      I could let the petals fall,

      and stand above

      and watch them hit

      and compose the ground,

      each composer writing notes

      that gently wheeze from dying throats.

      But no, I will blow them kisses

      into the wind, give them a future

      to rustle off to.

      In due time, they’ll speak

      of me as an oddity…no, as an oddity

      who makes the leaves

      turn themselves over

      and lets the wind

      move them forward…yes.

      Penelope’s Lament

      He’s late again – Odysseus is. Zeus!

      I spent (or tried to spend) this afternoon

      in feathers that I plucked from some old goose

      while baking wings like Icarus (too soon?).

      And now I’m sitting here with empty suit-

      ors, only sure that if (and not when) that

      Odysseus comes walking in with boots

      in need of twenty years of repair, that

      I will go up to him and say to him,

      “My love, you better have some really grand

      and truthful reason for why you’re late.” “Hmmm,”

      he’ll say, “Believe me, love…I lost my men

      to Scylla, that Charybdis, and wretched Cyclops…”

      and that is when I’ll smack that liar with a pot.

      Pygmalion's Still Life

      I've built you up enough to breathe,

      but still you're ink atop the page -

      you're not alive if no one reads.

      Your audience has marked your age.

       

      But still you're ink atop the page -

      you seem to move when I tell you to.

      Your audience has marked your age;

      their clapping's spun your heartbeat too.

       

      You seem only to move when I tell you to,

      ink blotches scotching your high heels.

      Their clapping's spun your heartbeat to

      a fevered pitch, believer's steel.

       

      Ink blotches scotching your high heels

      always follow me into my dreams.

      A fevered pitch - believer's steel - 

      will keep me asleep while sunshine spills.

       

      Please follow me into my dreams - 

      you're not alive since no one reads. 

      Will keeps me asleep while sunshine spills.

      I wish I built you up from the reams.

      August 5, 2010

      Red Wine Mathematics

      Although I may have

      a limp in

      my walk along

      this garden path, I

      know no limp in my

      handshake as I add up

      the math, walking

      past old friends,

      subtracting wispy embers

      in old lovers’ eyes.

      I dry my wet lips with

      a few sips of wine

      as I rewind the clock propped

      up amongst the coffee

      cups which stand at

      attention along the

      summer kitchen wall.

      Redbird Pillow

      We’re swimmers in the bed’s pacific

      covers, legs slowly kicking,

      floating on springs dried with salt

      and staircase creaks. You squeeze

      the pillow hard – like harvest cherries

      between finger and thumb. You

      became blushing reds in our bed of blue,

      a burning ship sailing across the

      only ocean we ever knew.

      You squeezed until I thought

      the goose feathers would burst out and tar

      your arms. If they did, I wonder then,

      would your arms become wings?

      Would they flap instead of hold?

      Would they whisk you from my world?

      Have I tarred you enough that, if

      we walked in the dark, you would

      camouflage against your shadow?

      August 25, 2011

      Rest is Silence

      I’m the idiot who deserves the ink

      washing my fingertips – this cleanliness

      coming from holding a pen so close it breaks.

      I hold it close the way I hug my

      shadow in the middle of the day.

      Keep close, shadow, I want you

      to haunt me like a ghost.

      The ink drips like a faucet on the pages,

      rusting away the empty poems I write

      simply to keep me awake. At times,

      the jet waters rise and flood

      my eyes shut and that’s when the

      nightmares drown me down.

      Please keep me awake.

      Right Hand Slip

      The pentrail slips the page

      easy as grease –

      the drop drips jumping

      in skillet like

      hot dogs for leftover

      biscuits.

      Sea: Columbus proved his

      world was robinround enough –

      for him. The oceans and the

      billows in their sheets dreamed

      on even after the

      bed is made.

      But when I leave paper –

      walking out through the back

      door corded between

      the lines graffitied straight

      and bored – I’m outdoors of

      myself.

      And though it’s (gr)easy

      enough to lunge

      off the page, it’s

      magic trick to puzzle

      piece together the pen

      and pad again.

      May 23, 2010

      Rose Bicycle Pedal

      “She loves me, she loves me not,”

      I said, picking petals off the rose,

      watching them fall like autumn winds

      amongst the whistled willows.

      I am the sail before the wind -

      I move wherever it wants me to,

      the wind giving me shape and purpose,

      filling in my pockets and

      my grooves.

      The petals trip like fallen heroes

      until t
    here’s only one that stands.

      I know which side this man

      will be on; he will be

      a soldier – not a romantic.

      He alone will win the war

      and rumor my awful flaws

      to the seagull flocks

      that rock the midnight air to sleep

      while high above they talk.

      They talk of so many things;

      they say, “the petals on the rose

      undid the love you loved

      with all of your heart

      and pumping blood.

      Did you not stop to think

      why? Because such things

      were not meant to be.

      So that leaves you here with us

      so we can rock you deep to sleep

      as you swim in the flood of tears

      that you tear at with your hands

      and we hope you sleep and drown

      before you reach the riverbanks.”

      I’m not done picking the petals yet though.

      Let me finish what I have started.

      Then once it’s done, let the seagulls feast

      on the blood that pumps me, the deep-hearted.

      Rose in the Snow-Garden

      Remember December’s embers

      were always raining down,

      coating our world with silver dust?

      Like then, we have to keep up

      now – we must. No matter if

      the weather blasts away

      our hearts or not.

      But I remember then – how

      the evergreens always seemed

      to glow that golden green,

      so bright that they seemed

      to scream the spring – even

      in the night. Then, there were

      still paw-prints in the snowdrifts

      and remember what we wondered?

      Not what animal walked there,

      but why an animal walked there.

      Why? Because no life deserved

      to be there. The smoke in our breath

      was all you expected – and what

      I wanted – to hear. Even then:

      Life. Has always. Persevered.

      Remember how we kept walking

      until our feet slipped, until we

      were standing on the cracked

      and chapped lips of some frozen

      ocean? No – we were floating –

      we stomped our flag down like

     


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