What do a hairless dog, a flaming chicken and Mel Torme have in common? Visit Freddy and Bubba's service station outside of Ashville, North Carolina and find out! Burning poultry at its finest!Steve laughed at his obituary in the Chicago newspaper. 'Famed artist, fifty, perishes in airplane crash.' He cut it out and taped it to the fridge.Steve hardly felt dead. In fact, since he'd relocated to the remote Greek island not found on most maps, he'd put on a few pounds. Islanders knew him as Fat Jack.Day and night he painted food.

High-spirited romantic comedy with an Irish lilt and a sprinkle of magic (part 1 of a 3-part serial)… Tempers flare and love sizzles under the surface when spitfire Sharon O’Shaughnessy and the roguish Rory Egan become unwilling co-owners of a whimsical old mansion (which may or may not be haunted) on the west coast of Ireland.Romantic comedy with an Irish lilt (part 1 of a 3-part serial)… The year is 1975. The place is Ramhaillim Manor, a whimsical old mansion (which may or may not be haunted) on the west coast of Ireland. The girl is Sharon O’Shaughnessy, an Irish-American spitfire who has just inherited Ramhaillim from her Great-Aunt Deirdre – or half of it anyway, as Sharon discovers when she reaches Ireland and meets Rory Egan, the handsome Irishman who has inherited the other half of the house. This could be a good thing, because Sharon loves horses, and Rory is a horse breeder. Except Rory is also full of blarney, Sharon is quite sure. He’s an incorrigible rascal, and a smart girl shouldn’t believe a word he says. Sharon, of course, is a smart girl. You’ll never find her falling under the man’s roguish spell. Or will you?

Yes, it's Volume 2 of TIW shorts! Yet another collection of totally pointless exactly 500 and exactly 200 word nonsense to entertain you while doing whatever you do when reading.Yes, it's Volume 2 of TIW shorts! Yet another collection of totally pointless exactly 500 and exactly 200 word nonsense to entertain you while doing whatever you do when reading. Here are my own personal takes on the second 6 months of the Iron Writer Challenge, including Challenges, Weekend Quickies, Grudge Matches and Solstice Opens - plus an excerpt of 'How to' killing Brian (Cannibalising Brian) and a slice from the first ever Relays. I hope you enjoy these short snippets just as much as you enjoyed Volume 1.Thanks again to Brian and all the other Iron Writers for making The Iron Writers phenomenon the success that it already is.

We was playin' rummy over to Hatch's, and Hatch must of fell in a bed of four-leaf clovers on his way home the night before, because he plays rummy like he does everything else; but this night I refer to you couldn't beat him, and besides him havin' all the luck my Missus played like she'd been bought off, so when we come to settle up we was plain seven and a half out. You know who paid it. So Hatch says: "They must be some game you can play." "No," I says, "not and beat you. I can run two blocks w'ile you're stoopin' over to start, but if we was runnin' a foot race between each other, and suppose I was leadin' by eighty yards, a flivver'd prob'ly come up and hit you in the back and bump you over the finishin' line ahead o' me." So Mrs. Hatch thinks I'm sore on account o' the seven-fifty, so she says: "It don't seem fair for us to have all the luck."

Short story about a planet whose inhabitants simply can't get along with each other. Not a day goes by without a war or at least a fight. Sound familiar? Things go as planned until Eve gets hit by another planet called Adam.Hell is a war torn dump named Jupiter. Rex Pain has been sent into this hell on the wings of a burning entry ship to win, die or die trying. With everything going wrong and not a hope of reprieve in sight, Rex must lead a small team of hardened space soldiers through challenge after challenge with death only a laser round away. Can Rex overcome all that stands against him? Find out within.This is the first book in the Rex Pain Space Soldier Series. In the next book, Facing The Maiden (Rex Pain Space Soldier #2), Rex faces off with the forces of Mars in a battle that will begin his journey into a new war that is not his own.As this book is the first in this series, it is free for your enjoyment. Thank you for your support!

Our anonymous protagonist travels North on mediocre assignment, and discovers something dreadful haunting the night and ruining the day.In 2188 NextYorkCity Senior Detective Damian Manx is known as on of the Global Police Forces' leading investigators. Especially when it comes to Unexplained Death cases.But even the seasoned detective is stumped when a series of brutal murders take place seemingly without any direct link between the victims, or with the killer leaving behind any useful clues.Now he's got the lifeless bodies of five women, a wet-behind-the-ears young partner, and a medical examiner with a strangely obsessive interest in the past to deal with. And not a clue where to start."Hell Found Me" is a short narrative rewriting of NPD Case File #UD2188-479NP.This Short Story provides backstory information to Greg Redd's upcoming series of full length near-future novels featuring Damian Manx.

Obert Skye, author of the bestselling Leven Thumps series, delivers a delightful mixture of offbeat mystery and laugh-out-loud humor in this thoroughly inventive adventure complete with comic-style illustrations, the first in a trilogy. Ten-year-old Perry Owens has learned everything he needs to know from comic books. So when Perry receives a troubling message from his favorite uncle, Zeke, he knows exactly what’s wrong. Obviously, evil newts wearing trench coats must have kidnapped Zeke. Now they’re holding him hostage somewhere on Bunny Island, the remote vacation destination that Zeke calls home. On his own, Perry travels to Bunny Island, where dozens of bunnies are running wild. One in particular doesn’t seem quite right. A creature this cute shouldn’t exist in nature. Are there truly evil newts on the loose, or something much stranger...and more disturbingly adorable?

This volume contains 12 books by Israel Zangwill, the British author at the forefront of cultural Zionism during the 19th century. This volume contains ten novels and novelettes, including the famous The Big Bow Mystery, the first locked room mystery novel. It also contains the acclaimed play THE MELTING POT, a work that, in his own words, influenced deeply President Theodore Roosevelt. Finally, it includes a volume of essays. The books are: THE BIG BOW MYSTERY THE MASTER — THE MELTING POTTHE OLD MAID’S CLUBTHE SERIO-COMIC GOVERNESSWITHOUT PREJUDICES — MERELY MARY ANNTHE GREY WIG — CHASSE-CROISETHE WOMAN BEATER — THE ETERNAL FEMININETHE SILENT SISTERS

All she wants is to spend the day with her beloved husband. Instead she's going to spend it at the office, another day sacrificed to the toxic reign of The Bastard.A tongue-in-cheek short story examining the ruinous effects of work-life imbalance.Includes an excerpt from my novel Nothing Ventured.Listening to his grandfather's exciting travel tales, young Ralph dreams of becoming an adventurer himself some day... Bravely pushing the bounds of exploration. Venturing into uncharted territory. And going where no Westerner has gone before. However, as an adult, Ralph's imagination can sometimes get him into hot water. Get this light-hearted tale and delve into Ralph's heady world of adventure!

Again we join the adventures of Tommy, Nona The Waitress and Robert S. Thompson in The Great American Westerly Midwest. This time we follow Tommy around town as he and his friend, Johnny, try to solve the great mysteries of religion; whether God exists, and if so, where is He? In the park? In the drug store? The cafe? Nona doesn't believe in God, she says, and Robert is just glad to be alive.But Kora sat unmoving, in great magic. The walls, her home, faded about her. Warmth went; all alone and on a freezing plain, dressed in a tunic, sharp knife in her belt, bow on her shoulder, arrows in a quiver behind. Her eyes gleamed; a pale cold light, ˈlɪmpɪd ɪn ˈdʌlnəsShe looked around. Away, at vision’s limit, a dark shape rose above the plain: a Tower, the only thing in all this barren place: no bird flew, no grass grew. Despite the wool she shivered. Breath-clouds hung in the raw air, ˈsləʊli dɪˈzɒlvɪŋThen in eye’s corner something moved. She turned to gaze across the Waste and saw a Cloud. Far, almost straight behind her as she faced the Tower, it too reared up black and sheer. Unlike the Tower, moving, whirling, wisps trailing their tentacles around a core, ˈtwɪstɪŋ ɪnˈseɪnli

THEY EXPECTED HIS ARM TO GROW BACK... THEY NEVER EXPECTED THE ARM HE LOST WOULD WANT REVENGE! In this second installment of the Atom Town series, Doctor Adam Townsend faces a murky end, and the only one who can save him is the one person who can't stand him, Secret Agent Eve Adams. But can she survive alligator infested waters and the Creeping Crawling Terror of... THE HANDS OF THE SWAMP!THEY EXPECTED HIS ARM TO GROW BACK... THEY NEVER EXPECTED THE ARM HE LOST WOULD WANT REVENGE! In this second installment of the Atom Town series, Doctor Adam Townsend faces a murky end, and the only one who can save him is the one person who can't stand him, Secret Agent Eve Adams. But can she survive Adam's blunders, alligator infested waters and the Creeping Crawling Terror of... THE HANDS OF THE SWAMP! ATOM TOWN Atom Town is a Comedy-Adventure Book Series that sends Secret Agent Eve Adams back in time to 1958 where she teams up with the arguably insane Doctor Adam Townsend to unravel the mysteries of a town that shouldn't exist! For fans of Comedy, the Atomic Age, and B-Movies! "Sheer Ridiculousness!" "Even Better Than the First Book!"

Amazon.com ReviewLight and funny, with a bitter aftertaste, the action of Sellevision takes place behind the scenes (and on the set) of a successful television shopping network, where a feminine role model, Peggy Jean Smythe, the married, Christian mother of three, begins receiving suspicious e-mail from a viewer who insists that Peggy's hairy earlobe is obscuring her presentation of jewelry during the broadcast. When Peggy fails to respond to the e-mail, but silently waxes her lobe, the cruel notes escalate, until Peggy believes herself to be suffering from a hormonal crisis that has given her a mustache, a gruff voice, and the manner of a lumberjack. Meanwhile, one of her cohosts, Max Andrews, has been fired for accidentally exposing himself during a children's special, and learns just how undesirable a commodity a penis-baring ex-Sellevision host can be on the job market. The book is an unusually smooth read for a first novel, with six or seven truly inspired lines. --Regina MarlerFrom Publishers WeeklyA relentless spoof of cable's home-shopping mania shamelessly borrows from gossip tabloids, TV talk shows and the endlessly loopy world of advertising. This first novel dives behind the scenes of Sellevision, "America's premier retail broadcasting network," as the channel confronts its first juicy scandal. Much-loved and handsome host Max Andrews has accidentally exposed his private parts during a "Toys for Tots" segment, and the flood of invective from outraged viewers forces the network to fire him. Though Max struggles to find another job, he bounces back nicely by segueing into an adult-film career. Meanwhile, another beloved host, prim and perky Peggy Jean Smythe, receives insulting e-mail from a mysterious fan named Zoe, whose snide commentary about Peggy's hairy earlobes and clumpy mascara sends Peggy over the edge into Valium addiction and heavy drinking. Peggy Jean's picture-perfect family is on the rocks, too: her husband, John, is happily seducing the nubile and willing 16-year-old next door. While Peggy Jean seeks solace through the guidance of Debby Boone and rehab, someone else must step in to peddle the Princess Diana memorabilia and the Dazzling Diamonelle merchandise. Either of two lead candidates for the job may also be the creepy e-mail stalker: Trish Mission, the innocent, young newcomer, or Leigh Bushmore, executive producer Howard Toast's mistress. This kaleidoscope of gleefully salacious intrigue aims to titillate and amuse in a purposefully over-the-top way. Advertising copywriter Burroughs throws in some witty zingers but, overall, the energy of this satire of commercial madness almost peters out before the last FuturePop Popcorn Popper or Moisture-Whik Control Panties are sold. (Sept.) Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

*Librarian's Note: this is an alternate cover edition - ISBN13 9781301954193 * Drew and Jenny have spent years being the envy of their friends with their out of control sex lives - well, not really. Mostly it makes their friends want to throw up in their mouths a little. With two little kids and two busy lives, for the first time, Drew and Jenny aren't on the same page in the bedroom. Drew will stop at nothing to get his previously amorous wife back in the sack, and Jenny will do anything for a full night of sleep. Carter and Claire, and Jim and Liz are their usual (un)helpful selves and are full of advice for the discontented duo, wanting nothing more than to help restore order to the usually happy couple's lives. In the third and final installment of the Chocolate Lovers Series, will Drew and Jenny find the spark that's been missing in their marriage, or will the trouble they're having cause a stickier situation than the time Jenny poured honey all over Drew and he fused himself to a tree?

Janet Evanovich, author of the blockbuster Stephanie Plum novels, and Lee Goldberg, writer for the Monk television show, team up once again for the fifth book in their rollicking, New York Times bestselling Fox and O’Hare series! Nicolas Fox, international con man, thief, and one of the top ten fugitives on the FBI’s most-wanted list, has been kidnapped from a beachfront retreat in Hawaii. What the kidnapper doesn’t know is that Nick Fox has been secretly working for the FBI. It isn’t long before Nick’s covert partner, Special Agent Kate O’Hare, is in hot pursuit of the crook who stole her con man. The trail leads to Belgium, France, and Italy, and pits Nick and Kate against their deadliest adversary yet: Dragan Kovic, an ex–Serbian military officer. He’s plotting a crime that will net him billions . . . and cost thousands of American lives. Nick and Kate have to mount the most daring, risky, and audacious con they’ve ever attempted to save a major U.S. city from a catastrophe of epic proportions. Luckily they have the help of an eccentric out-of-work actor, a bandit who does his best work in the sewers, and Kate’s dad, Jake. The pressure’s on for Nick and Kate to make this work—even if they have to lay their lives on the line. From the Hardcover edition.

“Hilarious….Strange and risky….A right-on, pitch perfect novel, with wide social scope, comic genius, page-burning storytelling magic, and juicy characters who wrench your heart and gut.” —Washington Post Book World A character so outrageous he could only have come from the ingenious imagination of Elmore Leonard, lewd, lecherous, law-bending Florida jurist Judge Robert “Maximum Bob” Gibbs has been judged guilty by a grudge-bearing malefactor and sentenced to death—by alligator, if necessary. Maximum Bob is a delightfully dark classic thriller from “the greatest crime writer of our time, perhaps ever” (New York Times Book Review), and any reader who loved getting gleefully lost in criminal mayhem of Get Shorty, Rum Punch, Out of Sight, The Hot Kid, or any number of the inimitable Leonard’s numerous crime fiction masterworks will get maximum enjoyment out of this one.