myself facing a big stone in the wall with
the letter
T
carved in it.
T
for treasure?
Excited, I pushed on the stone . . .
. . . and fell down a tunnel!
I tumbled down ... down ... down.
Finally, I found myself in a
cold
,
dark
room. I stood up and brushed
the dust off my fur. I looked around.
Cobwebs
dangled from the
corners. A grinning skeleton hung from
the wall.
I took a step back ... and fell right
into a coffin!
I jumped out ... and bumped into a
suit of armor!
I fell back ... and tripped over a tombstone!
I stood up ... and found myself holding a
mummy!
Then I heard a ghostly wail.
“Booooooooooooooooo!”
“I
want to go
H O M E
!”
I screamed.
Suddenly, all the lights came on.
In the light, I could see that everything
was fake!
The dust was made of flour. The cobwebs
were made of cotton candy. The skeleton
was made of plastic. The coffin was made of
rubber. The suit of armor was made of soda
cans. The tombstone was made of cardboard.
The mummy was made of toilet paper. And
the
ghostly
sound was coming from a
speaker on the wall.
I also saw a sign on the wall:
78
Snip and Snap’s
Collection of Tricks
Paws Off!
(That Means You!)
I should have known. Those twin terrors
were behind this!
I was fed up. I found a staircase and ran
up the steps.
Snip and Snap were in the hall, smiling.
“I know you left that trea
sure map for me
to find,” I growled.
“He did it!” said Snip.
“He did it!” said Snap.
Boneham shook his head. “Snip and Snap
have struck again, sir!”
79
80
PROFESSOR
FRANKENSTEIN’S WILL
I was looking for my room again when I
noticed that all of the Cacklefurs had left
the dining room table. They were gathered
in front of the fireplace.
Suddenly, I remembered why Creepella
had brought me here in the fi rst place. For
the reading of her grandfather’s WILL!
They say that curiosity kills the cat. But
I am a mouse, after all, and a very curious
one at that. I stood in the background and
listened to what the family was saying.
“Poor Professor Frankenstein,” said one
mouse. “Remember how much he loved
mummy jokes?”
“Y
es, he told many mummy jokes,” said
another. “Many
, many mummy jokes.”
“Maybe too many mummy jokes!”
The chattering stopped when a plump
rodent walked in.
“It’s BYRON BADNEWS, the family lawyer,”
the Cacklefurs whispered.
Byron Badnews was an unpleasant-looking
mouse. He carried a small silver box shaped
like a coffin.
The lawyer cleared his throat.
“Attention, Cacklefurs!” he
announced. “The moment
you have been waiting for
is here!”
Byron tapped
the lid of the
coffin. “In this
box I have" - he
paused dramatically —
BYRON BADNEWS
82
“
Professor Frankenstein’s
WILL
!”
T
he family began to
chatte
r
in
excitement.
“What would you do if he left you the
castle?” asked one mouse.
“I would turn it into a
HORROR
museum,”
replied another mouse.
“I would turn it into an
amousement
park,” said another.
“I would open a
vacation
lodge,”
Chef Stewrat tapped his paw impatiently
on the flo
or. “
Cheese chunks!
” he cried.
“Are you going to read the will or what? I
have to go stir my stew.”
Byron Badnews sniffed. “You seem to have
your tail in a twitch,” he said. “Very well. I
will
read the will. Cacklefur Castle goes to . . .”
Byron Badnews lifted the lid of the coffin
.
83
A stream of black ink SHOT out and
squirted him in the snout!
"Who did this?" he bellowed.
"He did it!" said Snip
"He did it!" said Snip
Suddenly, a bold of lightnigh struck the
castle
Thunder shook the castle walls!
Boooooooom!
All the candles blew out. The room was as
dark as the inside of a tomcat's tummy
An icy wind swirled throught the room. It
froze the tip of my whiskers.
"Isn't this fun?" Creepella asked, grabbing
my paw. "I told you you'd have a good time"
at Cacklefur Castle.
A good time? This was the worst time
I'd ever had in my life! "I want to go
HOME! I wailed.
84
At that moment, the doors to the dining
hall flew open. A shadowy figure stood in
the doorway.
“It’s Grandfather’s
GHOST
!” the Cacklefurs
all cried at once.
“I’m not a ghost,” said the figure. “I am
alive and squeaking, my dear family!”
The lights came back on. A small, skinny
mouse stood in the doorway. His face was
the color of moldy cheese. The white fur
on his head struck straight up. He wore a
stained white lab coat. He walked with a
limp and leaned on a cane.
As he limped closer, I got a better look at
him. One of his EYES was made OF GLASS!
Professor Frankenstein adjusted his false
teeth. Then he gazed at his family.
“What a nice family reunion,” he said.
“Why does everyone look so sad? You look
PRO
FESSOR
FRANKENSTEIN
Who Is He? A scientist who studies ancient Egypt.
He is an expert on mummies and tombs. He is a little
clumsy and has had many accidents in his lab. So far,
he has lost an eye, an ear, a little fi nger, and a toe.
His Secret: He dreams of being a stand-up comic.
86
like you’re at a funeral. Ha!”
“Grandfather! Y
ou’re alive!” shouted the
Cacklefurs.
“Of course I am,” Professor Frankenstein
cackled
. “I was picking mushrooms in
Nightmare Wood. I fell asleep under the
Tree of Eternal Rest. If a bat had not peed on
my snout, I would never have woken up.”
The mice all nodded their heads in
surprise.
The professor waved his cane in the
air. “Sorry to disappoint you, family!” he
squeaked. “Cacklefur Castle is mine! So
paws off — or you’ll be sorry!”
Everyone in the dining hall looked slightly
afraid
.
Professor Frankenstein smiled. “Don’t look
so glum. I have some
bloodcurdling
jokes
to tell you. You will laugh your heads off!”
What is Count Dracula’s
favorite dog?
A bloodhound!
Why was the skeleton
afraid of the dark?
Because it didn’t have
any guts!
Where do ghosts go on vacation?
To the Dead Sea!
A skeleton went to see the
doctor. The doctor opened
the door. He looked at the
skeleton and said, “Aren’t
you a little late?”
What kind of music does
a mummy like best?
Wrap music!
PROFESSOR
FRANKENSTEIN’S
BLOODCURDLING
JOKES
Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?
Because they have a lot of spirit!
88
SPEAKING OF
MUMMIES .
. .
The professor slapped me o
n the
shoulder.
“Did you like my jokes?” he asked. “And
who are you, anyway?”
“The name is Stilton,
Geronimo
Stilton
,” I said.
Creepella walked up and kissed me on
the snout. “Isn’t he sweet?” she asked. “He
and I are getting married.”
I cleared my throat. “Actually, we are
not —”
But Professor Frankenstein interrupted
me. “So this is your latest VICTIM — I mean
fiancé,” he said. “What is your name again?
Gabriel?”
89
“Geronimo!” I said.
He pinched my cheek. “So when will the
wedding be, Gideon?”
“NEVER!” I said firmly.
He ignored me. “Well, then, Gerald, you
had better treat my little Creepella well. If
anyone dares to treat my granddaughter
badly
, I will turn him into a
MUMMY!”
He waved his cane.
Th
e Cacklefurs all agreed. “That’s right!
We pity the mouse who mistreats our
Creepella!”
I was quaking in my fur. “Of course,
Professor,” I said. “I will treat Creepella
well. Rodent’s word of honor! ”
Professor Frankenstein pulled a watch from
his pocket. “I must go, my dear Gary,” he said.
“The mummy of the great Tutankhamouse
has arrived. I must get to work!”
Before the professor left, he told another
joke. “Why did the werewolf cross the
road? To eat the chicken on the other side.
HA!”
Wi
th that, he limped down the hallway,
still laughing.
Chef Stewrat came up to me. “I should get
started on your wedding cake. Stew cake
with stew frosting, of course.
When will the wedding be?”
“NEVER!” I yelled at the top
of my voice.
The Cacklefurs all stared at
me. “That Geronimo Stilton
is a strange mouse!” they
whispered.
91
WAH! WAH! WAH!
The doorbell meowed.
Boneham scurried to lift the drawbridge.
“It must be Mr. Von Cacklefur!” he said.
A few minutes later, a
very thin
rat came
through the door. He was dressed in black
and wore a top hat. I had met him before.
It
was Boris von Cacklefur
, Creepella’s father!
He held out a paw to me. “Hello there,
Geronimo,” he said. “You look well. Too
bad. We’re having a sale on coffins
this
week.
HA-HA!
”
“Nice to see you, Mr. Von Cacklefur
,” I
said.
Then another sound rang through the
hall.
M
E
E
E
E
O
O
O
O
O
O
O
O
W
!
92
Curious, we all ran to the window.
Boneham took a pair of binoculars out of
his pocket. He looked down.
“Cheddar biscuits!” he exclaimed. “What
is that?”
I looke
d through the binoculars. There
was a small basket in front of the drawbridge.
And it sounded as if the basket was ... crying.
We all ran outside.
Inside the basket was a tiny bundle
93
wrapped in a blanket. The butler moved
aside the blanket to reveal a baby mouse!
“
Mol
dy mummies
!” cried Professor
Frankenstein.
“A little orphan,” said Boneham.
“He’
s so small,” said Boris.
“He’s so sweet!” said Creepella.
“My,he can cry,” said Madame Latomb.
Snip said, “He must be . . .”
“. . . hungry!” Snap said.
Chef Stewrat clapped his paws together.
“He needs some stew!”
The members of the Cacklefur family
surrounded the baby. The little mouselet
stopped crying. He opened his eyes and
looked at them all. Then he smiled.
94
THE SECRET OF
THE CACKLEFUR
FAMILY
“We must have a big family meeting!
shouted Professor Frankenstein.
Th
e entire family gathered in thelibrary.
“Ladies and gentlemice, rodents and rats,
dead and alive, family and friends,” began the
professor. “Even you, Garrett. We must make
an important decision. We have found a little
baby. What should we do?”
Boris von Cacklefur placed his paw on
his heart. “I hate to be a mushy mouse.
But this makes me think of a poem by Emily
Dickinson:
“That Love is all there is,
is all we know of Love.”
95
I felt my eyes fil
l with tears. What a lovely
poem!
Boris went on. “Weall know the Cacklefur
family secret,” he said. “We lo
ve one
another. With love, we can do anything!”
The mice nodded in agreement.
“This little mouselet needs our love,”
said Boris. “And we have plenty to give
him.”
Creepella stood up. “Let’s vote on it. If you
think we should adopt the orphan mouse,
raise your paw!”
Every Cacklefur raised a paw.
“This mouselet is no longer an orphan,”
said Boris. “As of today, he is a
CACKLEFUR!”
The Cacklefurs all cheered.
I took the baby in my paws. “What a sweet
little snout he has!” I said. “What will you
call him? He needs a name.”
Creepella passed around a piece of paper.
“Everyone write down a name,” she said.
When the Cacklefurs were done, she read
the names out loud.
96
S
LI
MER
?
S
POOKSTER
?
BATRICK?
S
CREAMER
?
SPECTER?
S
TEWIE
?
C
REEPERS
?
I
GOR
?
D
REAR
Y
?
M
USHMOUSE
?
F
ROGG
Y
?
GRIMY?
S
KEL
ETIN
O
?
S
KUNKY
?
F
ESTER
?
M
U
MMYKINS
?
S
PIDERRAT
?
S
KULLY
?
HOWLER?
ZIGZAG?
TOADIE?
“Um, don’t you think those names are a
bit weird for a baby?” I asked.
“That’
s it!” the Cacklefurs shouted. “We’ll
call him Baby!”
Just then, I felt something
wet and warm on my
jacket.
“Um, I think the
little Cacklefur has
done a wee-wee!” I
said.
97
OUR LOVE IS
STRONGER THAN
CHEESE
Chef Stewrat ran to the kitchen. “I must
get him a bottle of stew! It is just what he
needs.”
I put Baby in a coffi
n-shaped cradle.
Madame Latomb took out her violin and
played him a lullaby:
GO TO SLEEP, LITTLE
CACKLEFUR,
YOUR FAMILY IS NEAR.
WE WILL ALL WATCH OVER YOU,
TO US YOU ARE DEAR.
SO GO TO SLEEP.
GO TO SLEEP, IF YOU PLEASE.