Valcheckedherwatchandthensaid,“Ihavetogo.I’lltheeyoutonight.”
Theyleanedoverthecountertokiss—justadrypeck—andthenValhurried off.Bythetimeshegothome,shewouldbeagrownwomanagain,adowdy middle-agedmothertoKriseeandsurrogatemothertoKari.Jerididn’tknow howValcouldhandlethat,butshesupposedhergirlfriendhadgonethrough worsethankstoTai.
Jeriheardacreakdownthecounter.Anenormouslyfatmanhadsunk downontoastool.“WhatcanIgetyou?”sheasked.
“Bourbon,”hesaid.Hetookoutahandkerchieftomopsweatonhisbrow.
HeturnedtolookatSheriandTeriastheydanced.Theyhadrecentlychanged fromcheerleaderstoschoolgirlsinsailoroutfitslikethey’dworninpreschool.
Theyhadmatchingblackpigtailsnow;theonlydifferencebetweenthemwasa beautymarktotheleftonSheri’sfaceandtotherightonTeri’s.Thefatman’s faceturnedredashewatchedthem;Jeribegantoworryhemightsufferaheart attackintheclub.
Shefoundabottleofbourbonandthengotonthestoolsheneedednowin ordertopullitdown.Thisalwaysbroughtanunwelcomeflashbacktowhen she’dbeenamidgetandneededstoolsinordertoreachmanyofthesuppliesin theoffice.Shescampereddownandthenpouredthebourbonintoaglass.
Asthefatmanheldtheglassuptohislips,therewasanothercreak, followedbyahigh-pitchedsqueal.Jericouldonlygaspasthestoolbuckled beneaththeman.Hecollapsedintoaheaponthefloorwithamightythud.This wasloudenoughthatevenSheriandTeristoppedtheirdance.
Ascustomersbegantolaugh,Jeriscurriedaroundthecountertohelpthe man.Heslappedherhandaway.“Getawayfromme,youdumbcunt!”Thefat manheftedhimselftohisfeet;heleftabloodypalmprintonthecounterfrom wherehisglasshadcuthishand.HeheldthishandupforJeritosee.“Look whatyoudid!”
“I’msosorry,sir.Letmecallforadoctor—”
“Justgetmesomebandages,youidiot!Icandrivemyselftothedoctor.
Andthentomylawyer.”
Jerihurriedawaytogototheoffice,wherethefirstaidkitwaskept.She foundMissKilgoreinside,examiningsomefiguresinaledger.“MissKilgore, there’sbeenanaccident.”Sheexplainedaboutthefatmanandthestool.
“Youfool.Lookwhatyou’vedonenow.”
“Me?Itwasn’tmyfaulthewastoofatforthestool.”
MissKilgoreglaredathim.“Youofallpeopleshouldn’tbelittlesomeone fortheirweight.”
“What?”BeforeJericouldsayanythingelse,herheadswum.“No!”she
whimpered.
Exceptthistimeshedidn’tgetlittler.Insteadshegotbigger—much bigger.Shefeltapaininherstomachandwhensheputherhandtoit,shefeltit pushingoutward.Itsoonturnedintoapotbellyandthenagutthatmadeit appearasifshewerepregnant.Therestofherbodysooncaughtuptoher stomach,untiltheseamsofherT-shirtandpantsexplodedtoletthefatooze forth.
Thetatteredremainsofherclothesreformedintoashapelessblackgownto coverabodythathadtoweighahundredtwentykilosnow,ifnotmore.She pattedthebackofherheadonlytofeelherhairhadrolledupintoatowering bouffant.Herglasseswerestillseatedonhernose,butthebracesweregone.
MissKilgoreshovedthemedicalkitintoherhands.“Goseetohishand, youdumbcow.”
“Yes,ma’am,”Jerimumbled.Shewaddledoutintotheclub.Asshe windedherwaythroughthetables,shehadtocontinuallyexcuseherselffor bumpingintopeoplewithherstomachandrearend.
Thefatmanwaitedforheratthecounter.Withhisgoodhandheheldthe bottleofbourbon,whichwasnowalmostempty.“Whattookyousolong?”
“I’msorry,sir,”shesaid.Sheopenedthelidofthebox,butheyankedit awayfromher.
“Iwouldn’ttrustyoutobandageapapercut.”
Chastened,shewentaroundthecounter.Itwasatightsqueezenow,given hernewsize.Sheturnedtothemirrorandsawherpudgyfacewaspainted deathlywhiteandherlipsandeyesblack.Herbouffantwasstillpurple.She didn’thavethepiercingsnow,whichwasasmallrelief.
Theonlysilverliningwasthatfromthesizeofher,shewasagrown-up again.Shehadtobeatleastseventeen,ifnotolder.Butsowhat?Valwould neverwanttobewithhernow,notlikethis.Shewouldn’twanttodateawhale.
Abottleslammedagainstthewall,promptinghertospinaround.“This placeisafuckingdeathtrap!”thefatmanshouted.“I’llmakesureyouendupin jail!”
Thenhewasgone.Jerileanedagainstthecounter,whichcreaked dangerously.Withasigh,sheleanedbacktowaitforthedaytoend.
***
Whenshegotonthebus,Jerihadtoturnsidewaysinordertoscootdown theaisle.Shewantedtostaredownwithembarrassmentatherfeet,butshe couldnolongerseethem,onlyherstomach.Iftherewasanothersilverliningit wasthatherbreastshadgainedsomeofthatweight,thoughtheysaggedworse thananoldwoman’s.Sheturnedtothewindowtowatchthedarkstreetsgoby.
JeritriedtothinkofwhattotellVal.Whatcouldshesay?Itwasall obvious.OnelookatherandValwouldreelbackinhorror.Shewould probablysayalltherightthingsaboutstilllovingJeri,buteventuallythiswould breakthemup.Shewouldhavelostthegreatestthingtoeverhappentoher.
Herheartbegantoflutterasshenearedtheentrancetoherbuilding.Val stoodthere,butitwasn’tthegeekyteenagershe’dkissedgoodbyethis afternoon.Instead,itwasawomannearlyasfatasher,dressedinapinkblouse andwhiteslacks,thebuttonsonbothlookingreadytoburstanysecond.Val’s hairhadbecomeshorter,tomakeherfacelookevenpudgier.Thefreckleswere stillthereamidstherredcheeksandtheicyblueeyesremainedthesame.
“Kriseetoldmeyou’dgotten bigger.Iguessthisiswhatshemeant.”
TearscametoJeri’scheeksasshewrappedherarmsaroundVal.“Thisis toomuch.It’stoomuchforyoutodoforme.Idon’tdeserveit.”
“Ofcourseyoudo.Iloveyou,Jeri.Ifyougetfat,thenI’llgetfattoo.”
“But—”
“Justshutupandkissme,”Valwhispered.
***
TheycleanedoutwhatlittlefoodremainedinJeri’scupboards.Jeristillfelt herstomachgrowlatherthatitwantedmore.Tomorrowshewouldhaveto maketimetogotothegrocerystore;shedidn’twanttoimaginehowmuchthat wouldcost.“Wecangooutifyou’restillhungry,”Jerisaid.
“I’llbefine,”Valsaid.Sheletoutaheartybelchtoaccompanythis.“Hey, doyouhaveascale?”
“Why?”
“Justbecause.Doyou?”
“Ithinkso.”
Jerifoundascaleinthebathroom.Theproblemwasthenumbersdidn’tgo highenough.Thedialwentallthewayaroundtoenduponfive.“Iguessthat makes125,”shesaid.
“Myturn,”Valsaid.Shesteppedonthescale.Thedialstoppedatseven.
“Ha!I’mtwokilosbiggerthanyou.”
“That’snotsomethingtobeproudof.”
“Itcanbe,”Valsaid.SheranahandoverJeri’sgut.“We’regoingtobe stuckthiswayforalittlewhile,sowemightaswellenjoyit.Weshouldtryto seewhocangetfatter.I’llbetIcan,sinceIhavesomanysweetsaroundthe house.”
“Val—”
“Don’tbesuchasourpuss,Jeri.Thisisn’ttheend.It’sjusttemporary.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Ithinkthetimeisalmosthere.IthinkTai’slethisguarddown.”
“Areyousurethat’snotjustwhathewantsyoutothink?”
“No.HereallylovesKari.I’mnotsureifit’sbecauseh
e’sinagirl’sbody noworwhat,buthelovesherasmuchasIloveyou.They’reprettymuch joinedatthehip.”
“So?”
“So,whenhe’sdistractedisthetimetostrike.”
“How?”
“Youleavethattome,sweetie.Youspacecaptainsaren’tgoodatthatsort ofoperation.”
“I’mnotaspacecaptain.Notanymore.I’mjustafatbartender.”Jeri begantocryasshethoughtofthewomanshehadbeen.Backthenshehad gottenangryifshegainedfivekilos,letaloneseventy-five.
Valhuggedherawkwardly,theirstomachsmakingitdifficult.She whisperedintoJeri’sear,“Iknowsomethingfunwecandonow.”
“What?Ireallydon’twanttogodancingrightnow.”
“No,somethingelse.Somethingyoudidn’twanttodobecauseyouwere toolittle.Butyou’renotlittlenow,areyou?”
Jerismiledasshebegantounderstand.“Oh.Iseeyourpoint.”
ShetookVal’shand.Theywenttothebedroom.Unfortunately,herbed hadnotexpandedlikeshehad.Whilebeforeithadbeenabletoaccommodate twopreteengirls,itcouldn’tholdtwofatwomen.“There’snowaywecanfiton that.”
“Wearen’tgoingtobe sleeping,dummy.”
AgainJerismiledassherealizedValwasright.SheturnedawayfromVal andsaid,“Canyouunzipme?”
Theymadeloveforthefirsttimewiththelightsout.Jerididn’twanttosee themountainsofpaleflabtheybothsported.Shewantedonlytoclosehereyes andthinkoftheValfromthisafternoon,thegirlshehadwantedtomakelove to.Inmanywaysthiswasthesamegirl,butinimportantwaysitwasn’t.They werebothdifferentnow,nolongerprettyorevenhomely.
JeribegantocrywhenValhadtopushJeri’sstomachoutofthewayin ordertoreachbetweenJeri’slegs.“Comeon,sweetie,don’tcry.Thisisgoing tobegreat.”
“Ijust…Idon’twantourfirsttimetobelikethis.”
“Areyouashamedofme,Jeri?”
“No.I’mashamedof me.Thisismyfault.”
Valstoodupfromthebed.SherearrangedherselfawkwardlynexttoJeri, theirrearshangingovertheedgesofthebed.Shebrushedasidetheloosehair thathadfallenintoJeri’sfaceonceshe’dfreeditfromthebouffant.“Thisisn’t anything.WhenIwasinthecircus,Icouldn’tevengetup.Ihadtodomy businessintoabedpan.Ineededsomeonetobathemewitharagonastick.”
“That’sawful.”
“Itwas.Solet’sstopfeelingsorryforourselves.Maybewearen’tmodels, butwearen’tfreakseither.We’retwogrown,full-figuredwomen.Andwehave thesameneedsaseveryoneelse.”
“Iguess.”
“Butifyoudon’twanttodoit,wedon’thaveto.”
Jericonsideredthisforaminute.Shereallydidn’twantthefirsttimethey madelovetobeasobesewomen.Themorepragmaticpartofherbrain remindedherthatthismightbetheironlychance.Tomorrowshemightget anotherblackmarkandendupfiveyearsoldoreightyyearsoldorsomething evenworse.ShemightbecometheWorld’sFattestBeardedLady.
SheleanedovertokissoneofVal’sflabbycheeks.“Let’sdoit.”
“Iwashopingyouwouldsaythat.”
Valresumedherpositionattheendofthebed.ThistimeJerimadesureto keepherstomachoutofthewaysoValcouldpositionherselftogetherhand betweenJeri’slegs.AtfirstJerididn’tfeelanything,butthenVal’sfingers foundtherightspot.ToJeri’ssurprise,itfeltthesameaswhenshehadbeena beautiful,skinnywoman.“That’sit.You’vegotit.”
“Ithoughtasmuch,”Valsaid.Herotherhandreacheduptofindoneof Jeri’sbreasts.ShekneadedJeri’sdoughyfleshwhileshecontinuedtowork betweenherlegs.
Jeri’sheartbegantobeatsoloudthatsheworriedshemighthaveaheart attackbeforeshecame.Shefeltaslightpaininherchest,butshewilledValto continue.AtlastJerigroanedwithpleasure.
Whensheopenedhereyes,Vallookeddownather.Sheheldupasticky hand.“Youwanttolickit?”
ThisbroughttomindwhenTaihadmadehersuckonhiscock.“No,”she said.
“That’sfine.I’llgofindatowel—”
“No!”Jerisaid.Shedidn’twanttolosethemomentwhileshewaitedfor Valtocleanup.“Justwipeitonme.There’splentyofroom.”
“Adirtygirl,eh?”Valteased.ThenshewipedherhandoffonJeri’sgut.
“Sohowdoyoulikefatsex?”
“Iloveit.”JerisatuptokissVal.Shewhispered,“Nowit’syourturn.”
Aftertheyfinished,theycuddledasbesttheycouldonthetinybed.Val saidintothedarkness,“Ipromisewearen’tgoingtostaythisway.I’llchange usback.Andthenwe’llgettohaveskinnysextoseeifyoulikeitbetter.”
“Ican’twait.”
Chapter18
Jerilookeddownatthescale:145.SheturnedtoVal.“Yourturn.”
Valslappedherbelly.“Thisisn’tyourweek,shrimp.”Shesteppedonthe scale.Thegaugespunaround.Theyhadreplacedtheoldscalewithonethat wentuptotwohundredkilos;Jerihopedtheyneverneededonetogohigher thanthat.Thedialstopped:156.“Iwinagain!”
“I’llgetyouyet,”Jerisaid.ThenshekissedValonthelips.
“Youmightnotgetthechance.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”
“Ithinktonight’sthenight.”
“Really?”
“Imightbealittlelatetonight,butdon’tworry.It’llallworkout.”Itwas Val’sturntokissher.“Iloveyou.”
“Iloveyoutoo.”WhenValleft,Jericouldn’thelpbutshiver.Itfeltasif theyweresayinggoodbyeforthelasttime.
Shesettledontothebedtheyhadbought,onebigenoughtofitthemboth.
SherolledovertoVal’sside,whereherscentwasstillfresh.Asmuchasshe didn’tlikebeingafatwoman,despiteVal’sattemptstomakeherembracethis, shedidn’twanttorisklosingthewomansheloved.Shewouldratherbeawhale thantobealone.
Shelayonthebeduntilhersecondalarmwentoff.Thensheforcedherself torolltotheedgeofthemattress.Withagroanshegottoherfeet.Shewaddled intothebathroomtotakeashower.
Theshowerwastoosmallforthewatertoreachanythingbeneathher stomach,whichnecessitatedhersittingonthetoiletandthenusingawashcloth tofinishthejob.Sometimes,iftheywokeupearly,sheandValwouldtaketurns cleaningeachother.ThatwasoneofthemanythingsshewouldmissifVal didn’tcomebacktonight.
Whenshewouldstandinfrontofthemirrortopileherhairintoitsbouffant andapplyhermakeup,shewouldusuallyhavetoholdbacktears.Thismorning shesilentlywentabouttheroutinetaskswithoutanyemotion.Shehadmuch largerthingstoworryabout.
Shestoodatthedoorwaytoherapartmentforamoment,wonderingifshe wouldeverseeitagain.IfValfailed,JeridoubtedTai’svengeancewouldend there.HewouldfindsomethinghorribletodotoJeriforsupportingVal.IfVal didsucceed,Jerididn’tknowwhatwouldbecomeofthem.Wouldtheygoback astheyhadbeen?WouldValbeasoldieragainwhileJerireturnedtothestars?
Shedidn’tknowhowtheycouldmakearelationshipworkthen.Eitherway,her lifewouldbechangedbythetimeshelefttheclubtonight.
ShetookafinallookbackatthebedsheandValhadsharedsooften.She blewitakissandthenwaddledoutoftheapartment.
***
Jeriearnedherfourthblackmarkinherfirsthouratwork.Shekept glancingatthedoorwayandthenattheclock,willingtimetogofasterorforVal toappearandtellhershehaddoneitorthatshehadchangedhermind.Atthis pointshedidn’tcarewhich.Butsowrappedupinthis,sheknockedabottleof vodkaontoaman’spants.
Asthemanscreamedather,thefourthblackmarkapp
eared.Herhead swumandshebracedherselfagainstthecounter.Sheexpectedtogetfatterand inawayshedid.Onlyinsteadofaddingmoreweight,sheshrankinheight, whichpushedhergutoutfarther.HerblackdresssplitintoablackT-shirtthat stoppedjustabovehernavelsothatarolloffatjuttedoutwhiletheskirtbecame atightpairofpantsshecouldn’thopetopulloverherstomach.Herbouffant thinnedintoashort,spikystyle.
Themanofcoursedidn’tnoticethissuddenchange.“Youstupidlummox.
Getmeatowel!”
“Yes,sir.”Whensheturnedtothemirror,shesawshewasprobablytwelve again,withfrecklesinplaceofherpalemakeupsothatnowshewasarotund geek.Sheforcedthisthoughtawayandfetchedatowel.“I’msosorry,sir.”
“Shutup!I’llseetoitthatyou’refiredforthis!”Themanstoodup, presumablytoyellatMissKilgoreaboutwhathadhappened.
Jerilookedbackatthedoorwayandthentheclock.Itwasstillalongtime untilmidnight,whenshecouldleavetheclub.ShewonderedwhatValwas doingrightnow.Thenshedecideditwasbetterifshedidn’tknow.Shetriedin vaintopullhershirtoverhergutandthengrabbedthebroomanddustpanto cleanupthemess.
***
Threehourslater,shereceivedherlastblackmark.SheriandTeri saunteredovertothebarforwater.“Hey,Fatso,”Terisaid.
“Where’syour girlfriend?”Sheriasked.
“Didyoueather?”
Jerisaidnothingtothis.Itseemedthelongertheyweretwins,themore Teribecamelikehersister.Jerihadhopeditwouldbetheotherwayaround,but shesupposedSheriwasthestrongerwilledone.Shewouldhavetobecomethe dominantone.
“She’sprobablytoobig—”
“Togetoutofthehouseanymore.”
Jeri’sfistsclenched,butshesaidnothing.Shedidn’tneedanymoreblack markstoday.Shedidn’twanttoimaginehowmuchfatterandugliershewould getifshedid.Sheturnedawayfromthetwinstochecktheclockagain.
“Wanttohearanimpression?”
“Thisiswhatyoutwosoundlikeinbed.”Asone,SheriandTeribeganto makesnortingandwheezingsoundstoimitatepigs.Jeri’sfiststighteneduntil hernailsdugintoherpalmsalmostdeepenoughtodrawblood.