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    My Life Had Stood a Loaded Gun

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      Essential oils are wrung:

      The attar from the rose

      Is not expressed by suns alone,

      It is the gift of screws.

      The general rose decays;

      But this, in lady’s drawer,

      Makes summer when the lady lies

      In ceaseless rosemary.

      Death is like the insect

      Menacing the tree,

      Competent to kill it,

      But decoyed may be.

      Bait it with the balsam,

      Seek it with the knife,

      Baffle, if it cost you

      Everything in life.

      Then, if it have burrowed

      Out of reach of skill,

      Ring the tree and leave it, —

      ’Tis the vermin’s will.

      Bereaved of all, I went abroad,

      No less bereaved to be

      Upon a new peninsula, —

      The grave preceded me,

      Obtained my lodgings ere myself,

      And when I sought my bed,

      The grave it was, reposed upon

      The pillow for my head.

      I waked, to find it first awake,

      I rose, — it followed me;

      I tried to drop it in the crowd,

      To lose it in the sea,

      In cups of artificial drowse

      To sleep its shape away, —

      The grave was finished, but the spade

      Remained in memory.

      I felt a funeral in my brain,

      And mourners, to and fro,

      Kept treading, treading, till it seemed

      That sense was breaking through.

      And when they all were seated,

      A service like a drum

      Kept beating, beating, till I thought

      My mind was going numb.

      And then I heard them lift a box,

      And creak across my soul

      With those same boots of lead, again,

      Then space began to toll

      As all the heavens were a bell,

      And Being but an ear,

      And I and silence some strange race,

      Wrecked, solitary, here.

      Fame is a fickle food

      Upon a shifting plate,

      Whose table once a Guest, but not

      The second time, is set.

      Whose crumbs the crows inspect,

      And with ironic caw

      Flap past it to the Farmer’s corn;

      Men eat of it and die.

      My Wheel is in the dark, —

      I cannot see a spoke,

      Yet know its dripping feet

      Go round and round.

      My foot is on the tide —

      An unfrequented road,

      Yet have all roads

      A ‘clearing’ at the end.

      Some have resigned the loom,

      Some in the busy tomb

      Find quaint employ,

      Some with new, stately feet

      Pass royal through the gate,

      Flinging the problem back at you and me.

      Summer begins to have the look,

      Peruser of enchanting Book

      Reluctantly, but sure, perceives —

      A gain upon the backward leaves.

      Autumn begins to be inferred

      By millinery of the cloud,

      Or deeper color in the shawl

      That wraps the everlasting hill.

      The eye begins its avarice,

      A meditation chastens speech,

      Some Dyer of a distant tree

      Resumes his gaudy industry.

      Conclusion is the course of all,

      Almost to be perennial,

      And then elude stability

      Recalls to immortality.

      To-day or this noon

      She dwelt so close,

      I almost touched her;

      Tonight she lies

      Past neighborhood —

      And bough and steeple —

      Now past surmise.

      The Bible is an antique volume

      Written by faded men,

      At the suggestion of Holy Spectres —

      Subjects — Bethlehem —

      Eden — the ancient Homestead —

      Satan — the Brigadier,

      Judas — the great Defaulter,

      David — the Troubadour.

      Sin — a distinguished Precipice

      Others must resist,

      Boys that ‘believe’

      Are very lonesome —

      Other boys are ‘lost’.

      Had but the tale a warbling Teller

      All the boys would come —

      Orpheus’ sermon captivated,

      It did not condemn.

      Candor, my tepid Friend,

      Come not to play with me!

      The Myrrhs and Mochas of the Mind

      Are its Iniquity.

      On my volcano grows the grass, —

      A meditative spot,

      An area for a bird to choose

      Would be the general thought.

      How red the fire reeks below,

      How insecure the sod —

      Did I disclose, would populate

      With awe my solitude.

      Color, Caste, Denomination —

      These are Time’s affair,

      Death’s division classifying

      Does not know they are.

      As in sleep — all here forgotten,

      Tenets put behind,

      Death’s large democratic fingers

      Rub away the brand.

      If Circassian — He is careless —

      If He put away

      Chrysalis of Blonde or Umber,

      Equal butterfly

      They emerge from His obscuring;

      What Death knows so well,

      Our minuter intuitions

      Deem incredible.

      Doom is the House Without the Door —

      ’Tis entered from the sun,

      And then the ladder’s thrown away

      Because escape is done.

      ’Tis varied by the dream

      Of what they do outside,

      When squirrels play and berries die —

      And hundreds bow to God.

      I dwell in Possibility,

      A fairer house than Prose,

      More numerous of windows,

      Superior of doors.

      Of chambers, as the cedars —

      Impregnable of eye;

      And for an everlasting roof

      The gables of the sky.

      Of visitors — the fairest —

      For occupation — this —

      The spreading wide my narrow hands

      To gather Paradise.

      To intercept his yellow plan

      The sun does not allow

      Caprices of the atmosphere;

      And even when the snow

      Heaves balls of specks like vicious boy

      Directly in his eye,

      Does not so much as turn his head —

      Busy with majesty!

      ’Tis his to stimulate the earth,

      And magnetize the sea,

      And bind astronomy in place —

      Yet any passer-by

      Would deem Ourselves the busier,

      As the minutest bee

      That rides supports a thunder,

      A bomb to justify!

      (With a flower)

      All the letters I can write

      Are not fair as this,

      Syllables of velvet,

      Sentences of plush,

      Depths of ruby, undrained,

      Hid, lip, for thee —

      Play it were a humming bird

      And just sipped me!

      It’s coming — the postponeless Creature,

      It gains the block and now it gains the door,

      Chooses its latch from all the other fastenings,

      Enters with a — ‘You know me, Sir?’

      Simple salute and certain recognition,

      Bold — were it enemy — brief were it friend,

     
    Dresses each house in crêpe and icicle,

      And carries one out of it to God.

      My life had stood a loaded gun

      In corners, till a day

      The owner passed — identified,

      And carried me away.

      And now we roam the sov’reign woods,

      And now we hunt the doe —

      And every time I speak for him

      The mountains straight reply.

      And do I smile, such cordial light

      Upon the valley glow —

      It is as a Vesuvian face

      Had let its pleasure through.

      And when at night, our good day done,

      I guard my master’s head,

      ’Tis better than the eider duck’s

      Deep pillow to have shared.

      To foe of his I’m deadly foe,

      None stir the second time

      On whom I lay a yellow eye

      Or an emphatic thumb.

      Though I than he may longer live,

      He longer must than I,

      For I have but the art to kill —

      Without the power to die.

      Good morning, Midnight!

      I’m coming home,

      Day got tired of me —

      How could I of him?

      Sunshine was a sweet place,

      I liked to stay —

      But Morn didn’t want me — now —

      So good night, Day!

      I can look, can’t I?

      When the East is red?

      The hills have a way, then,

      That puts the heart abroad.

      You are not so fair, Midnight —

      I chose Day,

      But please take a little Girl

      He turned away!

      Longing is like the seed

      That wrestles in the ground,

      Believing if it intercede

      It shall at length be found.

      The hour and the zone

      Each circumstance unknown,

      What constancy must be achieved

      Before it see the sun!

      A toad can die of light!

      Deaths is the common right

      Of toads and men, —

      Of earl and midge

      The privilege.

      Why swagger then?

      The gnat’s supremacy

      Is large as thine.

      BOCCACCIO · Mrs Rosie and the Priest

      GERARD MANLEY HOPKINS · As kingfishers catch fire

      The Saga of Gunnlaug Serpent-tongue

      THOMAS DE QUINCEY · On Murder Considered as One of the Fine Arts

      FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE · Aphorisms on Love and Hate

      JOHN RUSKIN · Traffic

      PU SONGLING · Wailing Ghosts

      JONATHAN SWIFT · A Modest Proposal

      Three Tang Dynasty Poets

      WALT WHITMAN · On the Beach at Night Alone

      KENKŌ · A Cup of Sake Beneath the Cherry Trees

      BALTASAR GRACIÁN · How to Use Your Enemies

      JOHN KEATS · The Eve of St Agnes

      THOMAS HARDY · Woman much missed

      GUY DE MAUPASSANT · Femme Fatale

      MARCO POLO · Travels in the Land of Serpents and Pearls

      SUETONIUS · Caligula

      APOLLONIUS OF RHODES · Jason and Medea

      ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON · Olalla

      KARL MARX AND FRIEDRICH ENGELS · The Communist Manifesto

      PETRONIUS · Trimalchio’s Feast

      JOHANN PETER HEBEL · How a Ghastly Story Was Brought to Light by a Common or Garden Butcher’s Dog

      HANS CHRISTIAN ANDERSEN · The Tinder Box

      RUDYARD KIPLING · The Gate of the Hundred Sorrows

      DANTE · Circles of Hell

      HENRY MAYHEW · Of Street Piemen

      HAFEZ · The nightingales are drunk

      GEOFFREY CHAUCER · The Wife of Bath

      MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE · How We Weep and Laugh at the Same Thing

      THOMAS NASHE · The Terrors of the Night

      EDGAR ALLAN POE · The Tell-Tale Heart

      MARY KINGSLEY · A Hippo Banquet

      JANE AUSTEN · The Beautifull Cassandra

      ANTON CHEKHOV · Gooseberries

      SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE · Well, they are gone, and here must I remain

      JOHANN WOLFGANG VON GOETHE · Sketchy, Doubtful, Incomplete Jottings

      CHARLES DICKENS · The Great Winglebury Duel

      HERMAN MELVILLE · The Maldive Shark

      ELIZABETH GASKELL · The Old Nurse’s Story

      NIKOLAY LESKOV · The Steel Flea

      HONORÉ DE BALZAC · The Atheist’s Mass

      CHARLOTTE PERKINS GILMAN · The Yellow Wall-Paper

      C. P. CAVAFY · Remember, Body …

      FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY · The Meek One

      GUSTAVE FLAUBERT · A Simple Heart

      NIKOLAI GOGOL · The Nose

      SAMUEL PEPYS · The Great Fire of London

      EDITH WHARTON · The Reckoning

      HENRY JAMES · The Figure in the Carpet

      WILFRED OWEN · Anthem For Doomed Youth

      WOLFGANG AMADEUS MOZART · My Dearest Father

      PLATO · Socrates’ Defence

      CHRISTINA ROSSETTI · Goblin Market

      Sindbad the Sailor

      SOPHOCLES · Antigone

      RYŪNOSUKE AKUTAGAWA · The Life of a Stupid Man

      LEO TOLSTOY · How Much Land Does A Man Need?

      GIORGIO VASARI · Leonardo da Vinci

      OSCAR WILDE · Lord Arthur Savile’s Crime

      SHEN FU · The Old Man of the Moon

      AESOP · The Dolphins, the Whales and the Gudgeon

      MATSUO BASHŌ · Lips too Chilled

      EMILY BRONTË · The Night is Darkening Round Me

      JOSEPH CONRAD · To-morrow

      RICHARD HAKLUYT · The Voyage of Sir Francis Drake Around the Whole Globe

      KATE CHOPIN · A Pair of Silk Stockings

      CHARLES DARWIN · It was snowing butterflies

      BROTHERS GRIMM · The Robber Bridegroom

      CATULLUS · I Hate and I Love

      HOMER · Circe and the Cyclops

      D. H. LAWRENCE · Il Duro

      KATHERINE MANSFIELD · Miss Brill

      OVID · The Fall of Icarus

      SAPPHO · Come Close

      IVAN TURGENEV · Kasyan from the Beautiful Lands

      VIRGIL · O Cruel Alexis

      H. G. WELLS · A Slip under the Microscope

      HERODOTUS · The Madness of Cambyses

      Speaking of Siva

      The Dhammapada

      JANE AUSTEN · Lady Susan

      JEAN-JACQUES ROSSEAU · The Body Politic

      JEAN DE LA FONTAINE · The World is Full of Foolish Men

      H. G. WELLS · The Sea Raiders

      LIVY · Hannibal

      CHARLES DICKENS · To Be Read at Dusk

      LEO TOLSTOY · The Death of Ivan Ilyich

      MARK TWAIN · The Stolen White Elephant

      WILLIAM BLAKE · Tyger, Tyger

      SHERIDAN LE FANU · Green Tea

      The Yellow Book

      OLAUDAH EQUIANO · Kidnapped

      EDGAR ALLAN POE · A Modern Detective

      The Suffragettes

      MARGERY KEMPE · How To Be a Medieval Woman

      JOSEPH CONRAD · Typhoon

      GIACOMO CASANOVA · The Nun of Murano

      W. B. YEATS · A terrible beauty is born

      THOMAS HARDY · The Withered Arm

      EDWARD LEAR · Nonsense

      ARISTOPHANES · The Frogs

      FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE · Why I Am so Clever

      RAINER MARIA RILKE · Letters to a Young Poet

      LEONID ANDREYEV · Seven Hanged

      APHRA BEHN · Oroonoko

      LEWIS CARROLL · O frabjous day!

      JOHN GAY · Trivia: or, the Art of Walking the Streets of London

      E. T. A. HOFFMANN · The Sandman

      DANTE · Love that moves the sun and other stars

      ALEXANDER PUSHKIN · The Queen of Spades

      ANTON CHEKHOV · A Nervous Breakdown

     
    ; KAKUZO OKAKURA · The Book of Tea

      WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE · Is this a dagger which I see before me?

      EMILY DICKINSON · My life had stood a loaded gun

      LONGUS · Daphnis and Chloe

      MARY SHELLEY · Matilda

      GEORGE ELIOT · The Lifted Veil

      FYODOR DOSTOYEVSKY · White Nights

      OSCAR WILDE · Only Dull People Are Brilliant at Breakfast

      VIRGINIA WOOLF · Flush

      ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE · Lot No. 249

      The Rule of Benedict

      WASHINGTON IRVING · Rip Van Winkle

      Anecdotes of the Cynics

      VICTOR HUGO · Waterloo

      CHARLOTTE BRONTË · Stancliffe’s Hotel

      littleblackclassics.com

      THE BEGINNING

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      Penguin Classics is part of the Penguin Random House group of companies whose addresses can be found at global.penguinrandomhouse.com.

      This selection first published in Penguin Classics 2016

      ISBN: 978-0-241-25142-3

     

     

     



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