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    Not Myself: Poetry From the Other Side of Me


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    Not Myself

      Poetry From the other Side of Me

      Copyright 2010 ElshaHawk

      Thank you for downloading this free ebook. You are welcome to share it with your friends. This book may be reproduced, copied and distributed for non-commercial purposes, provided the book remains in its complete original form.

      Table of Contents

      You Had A bad Day

      Size Matters

      Sunny Day

      Where Poets Come From

      State of the Union

      Soul Mate

      Friends: Not the TV Show

      I Believe

      Ode to Peaches

      Ruthie May

      You Said

      Behind the Door

      Ignite Jealousy in the Halls

      Wilted Flower

      Revenge

      Favorites and Fears in One Song

      Shower Scene

      Missile

      One Hit Wonder

      However

      Hostile

      Not Myself

      Giving Up and Letting Go

      Little Brother

      The Place Between Asleep and Awake

      Missed Opportunity

      You Had A Bad Day

      your alarm clock went off and your body said “sleep”

      your coffee spilled all over your feet

      your shirt was buttoned one button off

      your dog chewed on one of your crocs

      your great idea went up in smoke

      your muse slept in and never woke

      your lunch was stale and still half frozen

      your lotto numbers weren’t chosen

      your movie date was postponed

      your battery died on your cell phone

      your dinner burned a charcoal black

      your athlete’s foot is coming back

      your ebay auction never sold

      your enemy was just paroled

      your mail was all ‘return to sender’

      your heart is ready to surrender

      your head hit the pillow, finally

      your nightmare stung you like a bee

      your sheets are soaked through with sweat

      your day hasn’t gotten better yet

      your clock strikes midnight, all is calm

      your new day starts, a soothing balm

      Size Matters

      If I were taller..

      I could reach the second shelf in the cabinets

      I could dunk a basketball

      I could write at the top of the chalkboard

      I could hoist a child on my shoulders for a better view

      I could shop in the Misses section

      I could drive all models of vehicles comfortably

      But I’d have a good view of the dirt on top of the fridge

      I’d have to duck under low door frames

      And people would always ask me to get things down

      I would miss being able to rescue a terrified kid from the McDonald’s Playland

      I would miss reaching into small spaces

      I would miss climbing onto the roof of the van to strap down luggage

      I couldn’t rest my head on my hubby’s chest near his heart

      I couldn’t fit in the tent with my kids

      I couldn’t grow anymore anyway, so I guess,

      I’ll stay short

      Sunny Day

      Do you remember

      Chasing the clouds away?

      All we really needed

      Was a sun-ny day!

      You and I

      We’re the best of friends

      You and I

      Know where the sun lives!

      We ran and ran

      Sang loud and long

      We found the sun

      There all along!

      Do you remember

      Chasing the clouds away?

      All we really needed

      Was a sun-ny day!

      You and I

      Were never alone

      You and I

      Vanilla ice cream cones!

      We grew and grew

      Fought and made up

      We loved and lost

      In time we forgot

      Do you remember

      Chasing the clouds away?

      All we really needed

      Was a sun-ny day!

      You and I

      We’re the best of friends

      You and I

      Know where the sun lives!

      Do you remember

      Chasing the clouds away?

      All we really needed

      Was a sun-ny day!

      Where Poets Come From

      Behind the gossamer curtain

      Beneath the azure veil

      You’ll find a quiet beauty

      In exquisite detail

      You’ll hold your breath to gaze upon it

      You’ll take in the scents with your eyes

      The scene beheld is beyond words

      Sweet music touches the skies

      Poetry is wild here

      Growing hither and thither

      There inside this hollowed ground

      A single flower withers

      The dried petals wisk away

      And a tear is shed for its loss

      That single drop ingredient

      Births a poet from the moss

      State of the Union

      What’s up with people?

      Don’t know how to play nice

      Whining to the boss

      ‘Bout your petty price

      How you don’t like so and so

      So you want them canned

      Fired

      Expelled

      Cuz the World

      Revolves Around You

      It’s a frickin’ pissin’ contest

      You want to always be right

      You give no examples

      No reasons for his plight

      Fired

      Expelled

      Cuz the World

      Revolves Around You

      Corporate america

      Is not based on work

      Not based on Ability

      Nor skillz like a clerk

      It’s a popularity contest

      Impress, Dressed the Best

      And you’ll excell

      But do what you’re told and you’re

      Fired

      Expelled

      ’Cuz the World

      Revolves Around Them

      Soul Mate

      You know what T-shirt I like best

      My favorite color too

      And when I cry silently

      You know exactly what to do

      You know when it’s my birthday

      The right amount of fuss to make

      You feel so happy for me

      Every triumphal step I take

      When I’m being stupid

      You’re not afraid to tell me

      When I’m working through it

      You guide me very gently

      At times when I break down

      You try to calm the storm

      Time changes things outside

      But together, anywhere is home

      It’s not the feelings I show outside

      But the ones behind the eyes

      That really matter to a soul mate

      Connected by strong ties

      You know when to push me

      You know when to pull

      I needed you for so long

      To make my heart feel full

      Sometimes I take you for granted

      Forgetting about times gone

      Before my heart was content

      Before you brought the dawn

      So this is a reminder to me

      To make each day with you

      A picture perfect H
    allmark moment

      Before our time is through

      I could never love another

      The same as I do you

      Who could know me as well?

      No one, Soul Mate, but you.

      Friends: Not the TVShow

      Friends

      Not the TV show

      The people you know

      Who care about you

      And your life

      Friends

      Who love you anyway

      Fight for you any day

      Who argue with you

      And take offense

      Friends

      Who come back and say

      They still love you anyway

      And your friendship grows

      Much deeper

      Friends

      May live near or far

      Would take boat, train, or car

      To see that you have

      A good day

      Friends

      More valuable than gems

      Worth more than the world of men

      Because they love you

      As you do them

      I Believe

      I believe in rainy days that soak in deep to nourish at the root

      I believe in rainbows of paper butterflies swaying above my head in childish glee

      I believe in ice cream sundaes that melt fast in the sun leaving sticky puddles of joy

      I believe in harmonies that make angels weep for their beauty

      I believe in vanilla and lavender bubble baths of pure silent bliss

      Ode to Peaches

      Peaches

      soft and fuzzy

      yellow mixed with orange

      Peaches

      when underripe

      are hard and bitter

      Peaches

      when overripe

      are soft and messy

      Peaches

      when just right

      are sweet and juicy

      running down your chin

      drops of succulent bliss

      round, full, fruits waiting

      for you to bite in

      Ruthie May

      “I’m too tired to write today,”

      Said Ruthie May to her teacher.

      “I was up all night,

      Mom and Dad had a fight!

      Dad had a lesson to teach her!”

      “I hid under the covers and cried.

      Dad found me and said I was dreamin’.

      He tucked me in,

      covers up to my chin,

      But I stayed awake through the screamin’.

      “They argued and fought all night.

      They broke dishes and threw chairs.

      But I was okay,

      My room’s far away,

      I just listened under my teddy bears.”

      Ruthie May walked to the school nurse.

      She laid down on a thick foam cot.

      They woke her for lunch,

      On pizza she did munch,

      Then by the counselor she was sought.

      Her story went into a report.

      She begged her Mom and Dad not to know.

      Then went back to class,

      With a written hall pass,

      And gathered her work to go home.

      That night red and blue lights danced

      Across her wall as she quietly stared.

      A cop carried her out.

      Silent tears began to spout.

      Ruthie May pretended not be scared.

      You Said

      You said my eyes were like diamonds;

      I smelled alluring

      You said my first date was also yours;

      I looked ravishing

      You said you’d only kissed once before;

      I was your soul mate

      You said you’d never look at any other;

      I was all you needed

      You know what?

      I’m so glad you speak truthfully!

      You are my best friend;

      Always will be!

      Behind the Door

      I’d passed this wall

      A million times

      As I wandered in the dark

      Never before

      Had I noticed this door

      The crack below lit with light

      I pushed upon it

      See if it would budge

      Still unsure if I wanted to go

      The door swung

      Too easily it seemed

      Too good to be true as well

      I knew at once

      This was my home

      Where I was meant to be

      Ignite Jealousy in the Halls

      “That’s when I saw them, her arm wrapped around his waist and a smirk of pure sass thrown back over her shoulder, daring the school to challenge her conquest of the King.”

      Wilted Flower

      Robbed of moisture, the flower droops.

      Light petals once soft and pliable are now brittle and dry.

      The bright color long faded to dark hues of its former glory.

      Gravity pulls the weighty head down and tugs petals loose from the stem.

      The flower is spent.

      Dry crumbly flakes fall like tears, forgotten memories of days past.

      Such a short existence,

      fleeting beauty,

      gone before its time,

      plucked,

      fragrant,

      then spoiled.

      What does the flower think of itself?

      Is it proud to have given itself for a cause?

      Or does it feel its life was wasted and cut short?

      Gravity pulls the weighty head down and tugs petals loose from the stem.

      The flower is spent.

      Revenge

      Locked and loaded

      Cradled in my arm

      No time for apologies

      Only your harm

      You stole my girl

      Took her in my own bed

      Steel cold and hard

      Pointing at your head

      No time for words

      Trigger finger itchin’

      Hear her scream

      See your body twitchin’

      Brains on her face

      Blood on the covers

      Revenge is sweet

      Breaking up two lovers

      Favorites and Fears in One Song

      Gables on houses

      Gazeboes in gardens

      White calla lilies

      And long picket fences

      Rainbow like scales on saltwater fish

      These are a few of my favorite things!

      When the tires pop,

      When the wasps sting

      When a twister comes,

      I simply remember my favorite things

      And then I don’t feel so bad!

      Post-it note papers

      Comp’sition book pages

      Pen and ink doodles

      For more inspiration

      Dolphins that swim with the moon on their fins

      These are a few of my favorite things!

      When my stuff breaks

      When I cough and ache

      When I’m feeling sad,

      I simply remember my favorite things

      And then I don’t feeeeel sooooo baaaad!

      Shower Scene

      Rush of water full of noise

      cascading, ricocheting, refracting

      Wisps of vapor curling high

      Blurring, obscuring, enveloping

      Fresh clean scent of Ivory soap

      Wafting, invigorating, enticing

      Single translucent shower curtain

      revealing, concealing, alluring

      Sharp intake of breath escapes

      unnoticed, uninhibited, desired

      Missile

      I waited in the darkness

      Still

      Quiet

      I felt a rumbling

      Awake

      Light

      I was born into the cruel world

      Flying

      Fast

      I have a singular purpose

      Controlled


      Directed

      I aim for my goal, unwavering.

      Target

      Impact

      I feel nothing as I leave this world

      Heat

      Explosion

      And my short existence has made an impact

      Justified

      Satisfied

      Though others may hate my life, not understanding, it was mine to live.

      One Hit Wonder

      Never gonna be another one hit wonder

      Gonna tear the world records all asunder

      Gonna tear the roof up off this place

      Gonna hear my name shouted out from space

      Others may think they got the groove

      But only one writer comes up smooth

      Swift with the talkin

      Quick with the walkin

      Climbing up charts

      Winning up hearts

      You boys so nasty with the bellyache’n

      Give’n me fits and start my headache’n

      I’m gonna tromp and tread

      Climbing over your head

      On my way up outta down here

      Cleaner air up in the atmosphere

      Moving to the top

      I just can’t stop

      Never gonna be another one hit wonder

      Gonna tear the world records all asunder

      Gonna tear the roof up off this place

      Gonna hear my name shouted out from space

      All this bellyache’n won’t get you there

      Clear my headache’n up above your stare

      Lookin’ down at you from my throne on high

      No pity for the fools who bicker and cry

      Zap with lightning

      Thunder frightening

      Kissin’ Zeus, sharing with Hera

      Olympus grooves to Elsha’s flare-a PEACE

      However

      I put on a show, however no one sees.

      A third of the earth is land, however two thirds sea.

      I wear a sundress, however it might rain.

      The soul is cloudy, however the body feels no pain.

      I carry an umbrella, however the sun’s bright.

      I wear clothes, however my heart’s naked in broad daylight.

      The world goes round, however time is a line.

      I love you, however you can’t be mine.

      Odd is a feeling, however temporary.

      Cold despises hot, however they are married.

      A quandry, however a simple answer would do.

      The mystery is solved, however I haven’t a clue.

      You feel love, however it breaks your heart.

      They will come back, however they must depart.

      Chickens come first, however, so do eggs.

      Life hatches plans, however death sucks them away.

      The world goes round, however time is a line.

      I love you, however you can’t be mine.

      Hostile

      I think I’m going to explode.

      I’ve got to get out of here, right now.

      The environment is making me claustrophobic. I can’t breathe.

      I am so upset I just want to scream.

      But I can’t.

      I’m trapped in this tiny space.

      There is so much me and it’s all crammed in.

      I can’t even move.

      The anger is going to kill me, boiling over.

      I desire so much to get out of this sarcophagus, this tomb, this shell.

      To be a locust, oh how I wish I were.

      Surrounded by people who don’t care, who don’t even know.

      How I feel.

      I feel everything and I want out, NOW.

     


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