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    Crank - 01

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      5) Scott’s losing his anger

      long enough to teach

      me to drive. Getting

      my driver’s license when

      Grandma left me her

      obnoxious (but mint) ’75 LTD.

      4) Jake, sharing his Internet

      research on fetal

      development. Did you

      know that a fertilized

      egg, 36 hours old, is

      the size of a pinhead?

      3) Sorting through 35,000 names

      in the Dummy’s Guide to

      Naming Your Baby,

      opting for the strong,

      masculine moniker

      Hunter Seth.

      2) Epidurals. I meant to do

      Lamaze, really I did,

      but I managed to miss

      most of the classes.

      Here’s to labor, without

      unimaginable pain!

      And …

      The #1 Best Thing

      about those seven months:

      Holding

      my baby for the first time,

      knowing just how to do it.

      Thinking

      his red, scrunched-up face

      was really quite handsome.

      Unwrapping

      the blanket to count fingers,

      eyes, ears, and toes,

      Finding

      all twenty-four, precisely

      where they ought to be.

      Crying

      because suddenly,

      for the first time

      in a very long time,

      everything felt right.

      Lows

      10) Morning sickness. Puking

      my guts out as soon

      as I lifted my head

      from the pillow, each

      and every day

      for weeks and weeks.

      9) Listening to Mom and Scott

      argue. About me.

      About the baby.

      About the odds

      of it being some

      sort of freak.

      8) Trying to quit tobacco

      after learning how

      every puff made

      my baby’s heart

      stop beating. How

      could I be so hooked?

      7) Going to school (before

      my “condition” became

      obvious) an outsider.

      Knowing my old

      friends and I had lost

      all common ground.

      6) Boredom. The succession

      of little-to-do

      days, stretching

      longer and longer

      toward the longest

      day of the year.

      5) Long letters from Chase.

      USC was great.

      The football team

      was great. Los

      Angeles was great.

      Great enough

      to call it home.

      4) My dad’s silence. He did call

      once, to confirm Linda

      Sue’s tale. Then not

      a word, as if not talking

      about it could make

      the “problem” disappear.

      3) Losing Grandma, just when

      I’d found her again.

      A waterfall of flowers

      brightened her funeral,

      but they couldn’t disguise

      the stench of death.

      2) My water breaking, mid-Walmart…

      Contractions,

      uterine lightning

      bolts, striking

      immediately

      and not letting

      up for 18 hours.

      And …

      The #1 Worst Thing

      about those seven months:

      My steady, needful, forever

      relationship with the monster.

      Learning

      that “addiction” is much more

      than a buzzword.

      Discovering

      how very much it applied

      to my “me first” psyche.

      Struggling

      not to give in to inner voices

      much stronger than my own.

      Winning

      most of the time, gritting my

      teeth and “just saying no.”

      Losing

      in those moments

      when the world

      I’d created for myself

      closed in around me.

      Happy Endings

      I’d like to give you one.

      But I’m not really sure

      how this story ends myself.

      Being a mother is hard

      A lot harder than I imagined.

      My baby boy is beautiful.

      I sense an Old Soul within him.

      But he cries a lot and he

      doesn’t really sleep like a

      newborn should. No lectures,

      okay? I accept my part.

      I watch my mom with my son,

      loving him, as she must have

      loved me. She’s patient when

      he cries. She paces him to sleep.

      I wish I could be like that. But

      I’m only 17.1 feel like life is passing

      me by as I stand here on the deck,

      listening to him fuss inside.

      Sometimes I want to curl up in

      a ball and roll away. Sometimes

      I just want to die. I only know one

      thing that can make me laugh again.

      Crank is more than a drug.

      It’s a way of life. You can

      turn your back. But you can

      never really walkaway.

      The monster will forever speak

      to me. And today,

      it’s calling me out the door.

      A Reading Group Guide to Crank by Ellen Hopkins

      PREREADING QUESTIONS

      Why might teens begin using drugs like meth even though they know the dangers?

      How might drug addiction impact a family?

      What scars might drug addiction leave for generations to come?

      DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

      How would you describe Bree? Is this the same way that Kristina would describe her? Where did Bree come from?

      For Kristina, what is the lure of crystal meth? What does it provide for her? What does it take away?

      Describe Kristina's mother, father, and stepfather. Are they in any way responsible for her addiction? Do you think that there's anything else they could have—or should have—done to help her?

      Why is Kristina drawn to Adam? To Chase? To Brendan? In what ways are these three similar and in what ways are they different? How does Kristina's relationship with each one affect her?

      Which boy is most harmful to her?

      Why does Kristina decide to keep her baby? What reasons might she have had for giving it up? Do you think she made the right decision?

      Why does Kristina always call crank "the monster"? How do you think her renaming of the drug affects her attitude toward it and her sense of responsibility regarding it? Are there other things or people in the story that get renamed? How does this affect the way in which they are regarded?

      Kristina sometimes refers to herself and her life before drugs as boring and worthless, yet at other times she seems to regard it as something very precious. What attitude do you think is closest to her true feelings? Do you think those around her would agree with her assessment?

      The author chose to write this story in verse. Why do you think that she chose this format? What effect does this have on how you feel about the characters and events?

      What is the overall message of this book? Do you think the story will act as a deterrent for teens who are considering drugs?

      ACTIVITIES

      As we can see in Crank, poetry allows us to express ourselves in new and creative ways. Write a poem or series of poems about something that has happened in your life

      Choose a drug—crystal meth or some other drug that you've heard of—and research its effects on the user. Find out exactly what it does in the body, how
    long the side effects last, how much it typically costs, and any other pertinent facts.

      Kristina has an alter ego who allows her to be more careless and daring. What would your alter ego be like? Choose a name, list all the character traits s/he would have, and list the things that s/he could help you do. Imagine what your life would be like if you acted more like your alter ego.

      Kristina's baby, like many children of addicts, cries a lot and needs to be held more than other babies. Find out if your local hospital will allow you to volunteer to hold babies born addicted. If your community has no such programs, perhaps you could consider volunteering at a local drug clinic or an anti-drug program at your school.

      Write a short story about what you think will happen to Kristina and her baby after the events depicted in the book.

      There are several other books about teenage drug addiction, including Go Ask Alice and Smack. Read one of these other books and compare it to Crank.

      Crank guide written by Cory Grimminck, Director, Hillsdale Community Library, Hillsdale, MI.

      Find out what happens to Kristina

      next in Ellen Hopkins’s

      Walking with the Monster

      Life

      was radical

      right after I met

      the monster.

      Later, life

      became

      harder,

      complicated.

      Ultimately,

      a living

      hell,

      like swimming

      against a riptide,

      walking

      the wrong

      direction in the fast

      lane of the freeway,

      waking

      from sweetest

      dreams to find yourself

      in the middle of a

      nightmare.

      You Know My Story

      Don’t you? All about

      my dive

      into the lair of the monster

      drug some people call crank.

      Crystal. Tina. Ice.

      How a summer visit

      to my dad sent me

      into

      the arms of a boy—a

      hot-bodied hunk, my

      very first love, who led

      me down the path to

      insanity.

      How I came home

      no longer

      Kristina Georgia

      Snow, gifted high

      school junior, total

      dweeb, and

      perfect

      daughter, but

      instead a stranger

      who called herself Bree.

      How, no matter

      how hard

      Kristina

      fought her, Bree

      was stronger, brighter,

      better equipped to deal

      with a world where

      everything moved at light

      speed, everyone mired

      in ego. Where “everyday”

      became

      another word

      for making love with

      the monster.

      It Wasn’t a Long Process

      I went to my dad’s in June, met Adam

      the very first day. It took some time

      to pry him from his girlfriend’s grasp.

      But within two weeks, he introduced

      me to the monster. One time was all

      it took to want more. It’s a roller-

      coaster ride. Catch the downhill

      thrill, you want to ride again,

      enough to endure the long,

      hard climb back up again.

      In days, I was hooked on

      Adam, tobacco, and meth,

      in no particular order. But

      all summer vacations must

      end. I had to come home to

      Reno. And all my new bad

      habits came with me. It was

      a hella speed bump, oh yeah.

      Until I hurt for it, I believed

      I could leave the crystal behind.

      But the crash-and-burn was more

      than I could take. When the jet landed,

      I was still buzzed from a good-bye binge.

      My family crowded round me at the airport,

      discussing summer plans and celebration dinners,

      and all I wanted to do was skip off for another snort.

      Mom kept trying to feed me. My stepfather, Scott, kept

      trying to ask questions about my visit with Dad. My

      big sister, Leigh, wanted to talk about her new girlfriend,

      and my little brother, Jake, kept going on about soccer.

      It didn’t take long to figure out I was in serious trouble.

      Not the Kind of Trouble

      You might think I’m

      talking about. I was pretty

      sure I could get away with

      B.S.ing Mom and Scott.

      I’d always been such a good

      girl, they wouldn’t make the

      jump to “bad” too quickly.

      Especially not if I stayed cool.

      I wasn’t worried about

      getting busted at school

      or on the street. I’d only just

      begun my walk with the monster.

      I still had meat on my bones,

      the teeth still looked good.

      I didn’t stutter yet. My mouth

      could still keep up with my brain.

      No, the main thing I worried

      about was how I could score

      there, at home. I’d never even

      experimented with pot, let alone

      meth. Where could I go?

      Who could I trust with my

      money, my secrets? I couldn’t

      ask Leigh. She was the prettiest

      lesbian you’ve ever seen. But

      to my knowledge she had

      never used anything stronger

      than a hearty glass of wine.

      Not Sarah, my best friend since

      fourth grade, or any of my

      old crowd, all of whom lived by

      the code of the D.A.R.E. pledge.

      I really didn’t need to worry,

      of course. All I had to do

      was leave things up to Bree,

      the goddess of persuasion.

      Before I Continue

      I just want to remind you

      that turning into Bree

      was a conscious decision

      on my part. I never really

      liked Kristina that much.

      Oh, some things about her

      were pretty cool—how she

      was loyal to her family

      and friends. How she loved

      easily. How she was good

      at any and all things artistic.

      But she was such a brain,

      with no sense of fashion

      or any idea how to have fun.

      So when fun presented

      itself, I decided someone

      new would have to take charge.

      That someone was Bree.

      I chose her name (not sure where

      I got it), chose when to become her.

      What I didn’t expect was discovering

      she had always been there, inside of me.

      How could Kristina and Bree

      live inside of one person?

      How could two such different halves

      make up the whole of me?

      How could Bree have possibly survived,

      stuck in Kristina’s daily existence?

      The Funny Thing Was

      Bree solved the meth dilemma on a family

      trip to Wild Waters, Scott’s annual

      company picnic. Sarah came

      along to spend time with

      Kristina. But Bree

      had other things

      in mind.

      The first was

      a truly gorgeous

      lifeguard. Turned out

      Brendan wasn’t so pretty

      on the inside, but even Bree, who

      thrived on intuition, was cluel
    ess. Hard

      on the make, Brendan shared booze, cigarettes.

      But one guy wasn’t quite enough. I

      also ran into Chase Wagner that

      day. His outside wasn’t as

      attractive, but inside he

      was fine. Of course,

      I didn’t know

      that yet.

      I found out

      soon enough that

      both Chase and Brendan

      knew the score—and both

      were interested in me. Brendan

      only wanted sex; Chase offered love.

      Either way, I had my path to the monster.

      Later, I discovered that Robyn, my

      old friend Trent’s sister (not to

      mention an “in” cheerleader),

      tweaked to stay thin

      and “pep up.” She

      taught me how

      to smoke it.

      It didn’t take

      long to immerse

      myself in the lifestyle.

      Didn’t take long for school

      to go to shit; for friendships and

      dedication to family to falter. Didn’t

      take long to become a slave to the monster.

      My Mom and Stepfather

      Tried to stop me before

      it all went completely wrong.

      Kristina spent almost a whole

      year GUFN—grounded

      until further notice.

      But Bree was really good

      at prying open windows

      at night, lying with a straight

      face, denying she had

      slipped so far downhill.

      Nothing slowed me down.

      Not losing my virginity

      to Brendan’s rape. Not

      spending a few days

      in juvenile hall.

      The only thing that kept

      me sane was Chase’s love,

      despite all I put him through.

      He even swore to love me

      when I told him I was pregnant.

      Pregnant. And Brendan

      was the father. Bree considered

      abortion. Exorcism. Kristina

      understood the baby was not

      the demon. His father was.

      But you know this part

      of the story. You followed

      me on my journey through

      the monster’s territory.

      We wound up here.

      Who am I now, three

      months after I left you,

      standing on the deck

      with me, listening to my

     


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