My dad, and
My mom.”
“That’s five,” he says.
“All the people I care most about,” I say,
Barely above a whisper.
I’ve thought such a thing before—
Thought that I care about Trevor—
But I’ve never said it out loud.
It’s true, I think.
I do care about him.
A lot.
Maybe you could kiss him soon—
“And there’s four of me,” he says,
Interrupting my almost spiraling thoughts.
“Which totally means you care about me four times as much.”
“More than Rose?” I tease,
Wishing my heart didn’t try to
Beat out of my chest at the
Sound of his sexy chuckle,
Wishing I wasn’t thinking of
Kissing him next time I saw him.
“I don’t think that’s possible.”
Thankfully, my voice doesn’t betray
My thoughts,
My rippling pulse,
My desire to kiss him.
“Oh, it’s possible,” he says.
“How’d the picture of your mom turn out?”
“Good,” I hedge,
My emotions quieting.
“The contrast is perfect, but
I might have to crop it so
It’s the right aspect ratio.”
“When can I see them?”
“When I submit them,” I say,
“So I can’t work on them anymore, and
All you’ll be able to tell me is how awesome they are.”
“I already know they’re awesome.”
“WHO SHOULD BE IN THE TENTH PICTURE?”
I lean away from the computer,
Already knowing the answer in
My heart, but
Not wanting to admit it out loud.
“I’M NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM,”
I tell Jacey that weekend.
“So we had a nice dinner at his house.
His mom was there, and
He ordered pizza.
It’s not like he baked me anything.”
She swirls her straw and
Won’t look at me.
“Any kissing?”
“No,” I say,
Clearing my throat.
“This is lame, but…
I’m afraid.”
Her eyes finally meet mine.
“Of what?
You’ve kissed him before.”
“Of falling in love with him,” I whisper.
“THAT’S STUPID,”
Jacey says.
“Falling hurts,” I say, “And
What if he doesn’t fall with me?”
I shake my head,
Aware that I sound ridiculous.
I can’t help remembering how Harris had said,
“I am in love with you,” and how
I hadn’t understood it.
I’m still not sure I do, but
With Trevor,
At least I understand
Why people use the word falling
To describe love.
Falling is wild, and
Uncontrollable, and
Utterly breathtaking.
I can’t change how I feel about Trevor, even
Though I’ve tried for a long time.
I can’t stop myself from falling, and
I think I might’ve even taken that first step into
The unknown.
“Maybe falling is the awesome thing about love,”
Jacey says,
Bringing me back to
The picnic table at the outdoor mall.
“Maybe when you fall,
He’ll go with you.
Or maybe…”
She looks up at me from under
Her bangs.
“Maybe he’s been falling for a while, and
He’s just now starting to pull you with him.”
“OLIVIA!”
Mom yells from downstairs.
“We’ve been ready to go for ten minutes!”
“I know!” I call back.
“Five more minutes.”
I leave my laptop on my bed and
Dash to the top of the stairs.
Mom stands in the foyer,
Frowning.
“I’m uploading the portfolio,” I say.
“It’s due by midnight.”
She glances at her watch, though
She already knows what time it is.
She sighs. “We’ll be in the car.”
I hurry back to my computer.
Seven of the ten images are complete.
I watch the eighth one render,
Knowing it’s the one of Gramma-Linda.
I’ve labeled the portfolio “Something About Love,” and
I can only hope the judges will be able to see
The spirit I’ve captured in each image.
Trevor texts, but
I ignore it as the tenth picture begins it’s upload.
It comes up on screen, and
I stare into my eyes.
Wide, and
Blue,
I’m staring into the camera without smiling.
I look like I have important things to tell you, but
That you’ll have to work to get me to speak.
I look a tad haunted,
My hair laying in a jagged layer across my forehead, and
My left hand cradling my cheek.
I look like a survivor.
SENT
I text Trevor as Mom pulls out of the driveway.
His message that had come in during the upload had said:
Five hours! Have you sent it yet?
Him: Yes! I want my copy pronto.
I smile as I type.
Can’t. My mom dragged me out of the house
Immediately afterward.
We’re on our way to a concert in the city.
Overnight.
No Internet.
No computer.
Him: I hate you right now.
I laugh right out loud, causing
Rose to look over and ask,
“What are you laughing at, Livvy?”
“YOUR PICTURES ARE AMAZING,”
Trevor says when I answer the phone on
Sunday night.
I’ve been home maybe ten minutes,
Having just returned from the concert with my mom.
I glance at Dad, who’s
Watching me with interest.
I mouth, It’s Trevor, and
Head for my bedroom.
“You haven’t seen my pictures,” I tell him.
“That’s where you’re wrong,” he says.
“All the portfolios are online.”
I trip over my own feet,
My breath stalling in my throat.
“You’re kidding.”
I’m not ready for the world to see my pictures.
The Internet…everyone has access to the freaking Internet!
I throw my arm out and
Grip the wall for support.
A moan cuts through my throat.
“You are masterful with a camera,” he continues
As if I’m not dying a slow death right there in
My hallway.
“And I have to say,
That male model in four of the pictures is
Pretty dang hot.”
That elicits a laugh from me, but
It sounds breathy and
Weak.
“I’m out front,” he says.
“Come out, okay?”
He hangs up before
I can confirm.
I stand in the hall for another few seconds,
Trying to figure out why
I’m so scared people will see my photos.
I entered the contest.
“I entered the contest,” I say out lou
d,
Turning to go downstairs to meet Trevor.
“DON’T SAY ANYTHING.”
I hold up my hand as I fly down my front steps.
He’s leaning against his car, and
He pushes to a stand as I approach.
“I need to talk, okay?”
He nods, his lips pressed tightly closed.
“Thank you,” I say,
Forcing the words out.
“For making me enter that contest.
For letting me shoot you, and
Reminding me that I love taking pictures.”
“You’re welcome.”
He threads his fingers between mine.
“Done?”
“No,” I say, going with
My new reactionary philosophy.
“I cannot believe I’m going to say this, but
I think I have
Fallen
In love
With
Y
O
U.”
“IT’S ABOUT TIME,”
He whispers before
Bringing his arms around me,
Leaning down, and
Brushing his lips against mine.
My breath stalls, because
He pulls back so fast.
My eyes are closed;
My heart is skipping;
His kiss was too short.
When his mouth touches mine again,
He holds on, and
Kisses me like
He loves me.
“I DIDN’T WIN,”
I say,
Leaning away from the computer,
Where the results of the
California Junior Photography in Excellence award
Have just been announced.
My phone chimes several times, and
I reach over and mute the text notifications.
I don’t want to talk it through with Jacey, or
Read Trevor’s condolences.
Dad’s hand on my shoulder is
Heavy enough.
“Aiko Park had a beautiful portfolio,” I say,
My voice too high.
Hers was at least cohesive.
I should’ve known better than to turn in a portfolio
With four of the same subject.
The first runner up appears in the stream
Coming from the state site.
It’s not me.
Lucas Greene’s ten pictures float across the screen, and
They are stunning images of
Athletes.
The second runner up is Mikayla Sorenson.
She took masterful photos.
I don’t know why, but
I thought the love I felt for each of the people
In my photos would be evident.
Enough to capture the heart of
Anyone who looked at them.
I close my laptop,
Not caring to know who took third,
Knowing it wasn’t me.
“WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH YOUR $2500?”
Trevor asks when I finally pick up his call
Later that night.
“What are you talking about?”
I haven’t looked at my phone in hours, because
He and Jacey have been bombarding me with texts
I don’t want to read.
“You winning third place?” he asks.
“I thought you were watching the live feed.”
I sit up in bed,
My heart palpitating.
“Are you saying I won third place?”
“Are you saying you didn’t know?”
“Meet me at the dock,” I tell him,
Barely managing to hang up before
I scream.
After that,
The silence sounds so loud,
Like it’s not quite sure that I won third place either.
“DAD, I’M MEETING TREVOR FOR A FEW MINUTES.”
I rush past Dad’s office on
“Wait a second,” he calls.
“Where are you going?”
“Just to the dock.
Ten minutes, I swear.”
I can’t stop smiling, and
I swear my heart has never beat this fast before.
“I won third place!”
His brow furrows for a moment, then
He yells.
“You won third place!”
He reaches for his jacket and
Calls to Rose.
“Let me drive you.
We’ll go celebrate.”
MY DAD IS WITH ME
I text Trevor, so
He’ll have some warning, but
I find I don’t care if
My dad is with me.
Trevor is sitting in his car when
We get there, because
It’s windy and cold tonight.
He either didn’t get the text, or
Doesn’t care, because
He leaps from the car and
Gathers me into a tight hug
Right in front of my father.
I hold onto his warmth,
Not caring who sees us here,
Hugging.
I don’t need to hide anything
From anyone
Anymore.
I give him a squeeze,
Hoping he’ll be able to take how I feel and
Recognize it.
“Thank you,” I whisper, and
He buries his face in my neck and says,
“I found you.
I love you.”
About Elana Johnson:
Elana Johnson is the author of the Possession series, which includes full-length novels POSSESSION, SURRENDER, and ABANDON, and short stories REGRET (ebook only) and RESIST (free).
She is also the author of ELEVATED and SOMETHING ABOUT LOVE, standalone young adult contemporary romance novels-in-verse.
Her Elemental series includes prequel novella, ELEMENTAL RUSH (which is free!), full-length futuristic fantasy novel, ELEMENTAL HUNGER, and a concluding novella, ELEMENTAL RELEASE (also free).
Elana wishes she could experience her first kiss again, tell the mean girl where to shove it, and have cool superpowers like reading minds and controlling fire. To fulfill her desires, she writes young adult novels. She runs a personal blog on publishing and is a founding author of the QueryTracker blog, a regular contributor to The League of Extraordinary Writers, and a co-organizer of WriteOnCon.
Find her on Facebook, twitter, tumblr, Wattpad, or her blog.
If you liked this book, please take a few minutes to leave a review for it. Authors (Elana included!) really appreciate this, and it helps draw more readers to books they might like. Thanks!
READ MORE OF ELANA'S BOOKS:
Possession
Surrender
Abandon
Resist (free)
Regret
Elemental Rush (free)
Elemental Hunger
Elemental Release (free)
Elevated
Something About Love
SOMETHING ABOUT LOVE
Copyright © 2014 by Elana Johnson
Published by AEJ Creative Works
All Rights Reserved.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. No part of this book can be reproduced in any form or by electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without the express written permission of the author. The only exception is by a reviewer who may quote short excerpts in a review.
Cover Design by Erin Summerill Photography
Interior Design by AEJ Creative Works
Fonts used: Windsong - Fontsquirrel.com
Cover photograph © Andrekart Photography - Shutterstock.com
Find Elana on the web!
http://elanajohnson.blogspot.com
http://twitter.com/ElanaJ
Table of Contents
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six
Part Seven
Part Eight
Part Nine
Part Ten
Part Eleven
Part Twelve
Part Thirteen
About Elana Johnson
Copyright