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    The Lives and Times of Archy and Mehitabel

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      or will be

      well archy the world is full of ups

      and downs but toujours gai is my motto

      cheerio my deario

      archy

      the flattered lightning bug

      a lightning bug got

      in here the other night a

      regular hick from

      the real country he was

      awful proud of himself you

      city insects may think

      you are some punkins

      but i don t see any

      of you flashing in the dark

      like we do in

      the country all right go

      to it says i mehitabel the

      cat and that green

      spider who lives in your locker

      and two or three cockroach

      friends of mine and a

      friendly rat all gathered

      around him and urged him on

      and he lightened and

      lightened and lightened you

      don t see anything like this

      in town often he says go to it

      we told him it s a

      real treat to us and

      we nicknamed him broadway

      which pleased him

      this is the life

      he said all i

      need is a harbor

      under me to be a

      statue of liberty and

      he got so vain of

      himself i had to take

      him down a peg you ve

      made lightning for two hours

      little bug i told him

      but i don t hear

      any claps of thunder

      yet there are some men

      like that when he wore

      himself out mehitabel

      the cat ate him

      archy

      the robin and the worm

      a robin said to an

      angleworm as he ate him

      i am sorry but a bird

      has to live somehow the

      worm being slow witted could

      not gather his

      dissent into a wise crack

      and retort he was

      effectually swallowed

      before he could turn

      a phrase

      by the time he had

      reflected long enough

      to say but why must a

      bird live

      he felt the beginnings

      of a gradual change

      invading him

      some new and disintegrating

      influence

      was stealing along him

      from his positive

      to his negative pole

      and he did not have

      the mental stamina

      of a jonah to resist the

      insidious

      process of assimilation

      which comes like a thief

      in the night

      demons and fishhooks

      he exclaimed

      i am losing my personal

      identity as a worm

      my individuality

      is melting away from me

      odds craw i am becoming

      part and parcel of

      this bloody robin

      so help me i am thinking

      like a robin and not

      like a worm any

      longer yes yes i even

      find myself agreeing

      that a robin must live

      i still do not

      understand with my mentality

      why a robin must live

      and yet i swoon into a

      condition of belief

      yes yes by heck that is

      my dogma and i shout it a

      robin must live

      amen said a beetle who had

      preceded him into the

      interior that is the way i

      feel myself is it not

      wonderful when one arrives

      at the place

      where he can give up his

      ambitions and resignedly

      nay even with gladness

      recognize that it is a far

      far better thing to be

      merged harmoniously

      in the cosmic all

      and this comfortable situation

      in his midst

      so affected the marauding

      robin that he perched

      upon a blooming twig

      and sang until the

      blossoms shook with ecstasy

      he sang

      i have a good digestion

      and there is a god after all

      which i was wicked

      enough to doubt

      yesterday when it rained

      breakfast breakfast

      i am full of breakfast

      and they are at breakfast

      in heaven

      they breakfast in heaven

      all s well with the world

      so intent was this pious and

      murderous robin

      on his own sweet song

      that he did not notice

      mehitabel the cat

      sneaking toward him

      she pounced just as he

      had extended his larynx

      in a melodious burst of

      thanksgiving and

      he went the way of all

      flesh fish and good red herring

      a ha purred mehitabel

      licking the last

      feather from her whiskers

      was not that a beautiful

      song he was singing

      just before i took him to

      my bosom

      they breakfast in heaven

      all s well with the world

      how true that is

      and even yet his song

      echoes in the haunted

      woodland of my midriff

      peace and joy in the world

      and over all the

      provident skies

      how beautiful is the universe

      when something digestible meets

      with an eager digestion

      how sweet the embrace

      when atom rushes to the arms

      of waiting atom

      and they dance together

      skimming with fairy feet

      along a tide of gastric juices

      oh feline cosmos you were

      made for cats

      and in the spring

      old cosmic thing

      i dine and dance with you

      i shall creep through

      yonder tall grass

      to see if peradventure

      some silly fledgling thrushes

      newly from the nest

      be not floundering therein

      i have a gusto this

      morning i have a hunger

      i have a yearning to hear

      from my stomach

      further music in accord with

      the mystic chanting

      of the spheres of the stars that

      sang together in the dawn of

      creation prophesying food

      for me i have a faith

      that providence has hidden for me

      in yonder tall grass

      still more

      ornithological delicatessen

      oh gayly let me strangle

      what is gayly given

      well well boss there is

      something to be said

      for the lyric and imperial

      attitude

      believe that everything is for

      you until you discover

      that you are for it

      sing your faith in what you

      get to eat right up to the

      minute you are eaten

      for you are going

      to be eaten

      will the orchestra please

      strike up that old

      tutankhamen jazz while i dance

      a few steps i learnt from an

      egyptian scarab and some day i

      will narrate to you the most

      merry light headed wheeze

      that the skull of yori
    ck put

      across in answer to the

      melancholy of the dane and also

      what the ghost of

      hamlet s father replied to the skull

      not forgetting the worm that

      wriggled across one of the picks

      the grave diggers had left behind

      for the worm listened and winked

      at horatio while the skull and the

      ghost and the prince talked

      saying there are more things

      twixt the vermiform appendix

      and nirvana than are dreamt of

      in thy philosophy horatio

      fol de riddle fol de rol

      must every parrot be a poll

      archy

      mehitabel finds a home

      well now it

      looks as if

      mehitabel the cat

      might be on the

      way toward a

      reform or if not

      a reform at least

      on the way toward

      domestication of some

      sort some young

      artists who live in

      their studio

      in the greenwich

      village section

      of new york city

      have taken pity

      on her destitution

      and have adopted

      her this is the

      life archy she says

      i am living on

      condensed milk and

      synthetic gin hoopla

      for the vie de boheme

      exclamation point

      there s nothing bourgeois

      about those people

      that have taken

      me in archy i

      have been there

      a week and have

      not yet seen them

      go to bed

      except in the daytime

      kitty said my new mistress to me

      a party every night

      and neither

      the piano lid

      nor the ice-box lid

      ever closed

      kitty said my new

      mistress to me

      yesterday you are

      welcome here so long

      as you don t

      raise a family

      but the first

      kitten that i hear

      mewing on these

      premises back to

      the alley for you

      it is a comfort to

      know there are some

      live ones left in

      these melancholy days

      and while the

      humans are dancing

      in the studio

      i get some of my

      feline friends

      and we sing

      and dance on the

      skylight to gehenna

      with the bourgeois

      bunch that locks

      their ice boxes

      archy when i lead my

      gang into the

      apartment at

      four in the morning

      there are no bolts

      or bars anywhere

      and not an

      inhibition on the place

      i feel little

      archy that i have

      come home to my own

      kith and kin

      again after

      years of fruitless

      wandering

      archy

      fell into the mincemeat at christmas

      the wail of archy

      damned be this transmigration

      doubledamned be the boob pythagoras

      the gink that went and invented it

      i hope that his soul for a thousand

      turns of the wheel of existence

      bides in the shell of a louse

      dodging a fine toothed comb

      i once was a vers libre poet

      i died and my spirit migrated

      into the flesh of a cockroach

      gods how i yearn to be human

      neither a vers libre poet

      nor yet the inmate of a cockroach

      a six footed scurrying cockroach

      given to bastard hexameters

      longfellowish sprawling hexameters

      rather had i been a starfish

      to shoot a heroic pentameter

      gods i am pent in a cockroach

      i with the soul of a dante

      am mate and companion of fleas

      i with the gift of a homer

      must smile when a mouse calls me pal

      tumble bugs are my familiars

      this is the punishment meted

      because i have written vers libre

      here i abide in the twilight

      neither a man nor an insect

      and ghosts of the damned that await

      a word from the core of the cosmos

      to pop into bodies grotesque

      are all the companions i have

      with intellect more than a bug s

      ghosts of the damned under sentence

      to crawl into maggots and live there

      or work out a stretch as a rat

      cheerful companions to pal with

      i with the brain of a milton

      fell into the mincemeat at christmas

      and was damned near baked in a pie

      i with the touch of a chaucer

      to be chivvied out of a sink

      float through a greasy drain pipe

      into the hell of a sewer

      i with the tastes of a byron

      expected to live upon garbage

      gods what a charnel existence

      curses upon that pythagoras

      i hope that he dwells for a million

      turns of the wheel of life

      deep in an oyster crab s belly

      stewed in the soup of gehenna

      i with the soul of a hamlet

      doomed always to wallow in farce

      yesterday maddened with sorrow

      i leapt from the woolworth tower

      in an effort to dash out my brains

      gods what a wretched pathetic

      and anti climactic attempt

      i fluttered i floated i drifted

      i landed as light as a feather

      on the top of a bald man s head

      whose hat had blown off at the corner

      and all of the hooting hundreds

      laughed at the comic cockroach

      not mine was the suicide s solace

      of a dull thud ending it all

      gods what a terrible tragedy

      not to make good with the tragic

      gods what a heart breaking pathos

      to be always doomed to the comic

      o make me a cockroach entirely

      or make me a human once more

      give me the mind of a cockroach

      or give me the shape of a man

      if i were to plan out a drama

      great as great Shakespeare s othello

      it would be touched with the cockroach

      and people would say it was comic

      even the demons i talk with

      ghosts of the damned that await

      vile incarnation as spiders

      affect to consider me comic

      wait till their loathsome embodiment

      wears into the stuff of the spirit

      and then let them laugh if they can

      damned be the soul of pythagoras

      who first filled the fates with this notion

      of transmigration of spirits

      i hope he turns into a flea

      on the back of a hound of hell

      and is chased for a million years

      with a set of red hot teeth

      exclamation point

      archy

      what have i done to deserve all these kittens

      mehitabel and her kittens

      well boss

      mehitabel the cat

      has reappeared in her old

      haunts with a

      flock of kittens

      three of them this time


      archy she said to me

      yesterday

      the life of a female

      artist is continually

      hampered what in hell

      have i done to deserve

      all these kittens

      i look back on my life

      and it seems to me to be

      just one damned kitten

      after another

      i am a dancer archy

      and my only prayer

      is to be allowed

      to give my best to my art

      but just as i feel

      that i am succeeding

      in my life work

      along comes another batch

      of these damned kittens

      it is not archy

      that i am shy on mother love

      god knows i care for

      the sweet little things

      curse them

      but am i never to be allowed

      to live my own life

      i have purposely avoided

      matrimony in the interests

      of the higher life

      but i might just

      as well have been a domestic

      slave for all the freedom

      i have gained

      i hope none of them

      gets run over by

      an automobile

      my heart would bleed

      if anything happened

      to them and i found it out

      but it isn t fair archy

      it isn t fair

      these damned tom cats have all

      the fun and freedom

      if i was like some of these

      green eyed feline vamps i know

      i would simply walk out on the

      bunch of them and

      let them shift for themselves

      but i am not that kind

      archy i am full of mother love

      my kindness has always

      been my curse

      a tender heart is the cross i bear

      self sacrifice always and forever

      is my motto damn them

      i will make a home

      for the sweet innocent

      little things

      unless of course providence

      in his wisdom should remove

      them they are living

      just now in an abandoned

      garbage can just behind

      a made over stable in greenwich

      village and if it rained

      into the can before i could

      get back and rescue them

      i am afraid the little

      dears might drown

      it makes me shudder just

      to think of it

      of course if i were a family cat

      they would probably

      be drowned anyhow

      sometimes i think

      the kinder thing would be

      for me to carry the

      sweet little things

      over to the river

      and drop them in myself

      but a mother s love archy

      is so unreasonable

      something always prevents me

     


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