What did you expect, a happy ending?
Your E.T. tumbles out of your hand. On the screen plays a video filmed from a corporate office. A man in a black hood announces that Peace Corpse wants you to know what harmful substances people are breathing and ingesting. The contents of the "safe” pesticides are published. A list of toxic chemicals and sickness-causing contaminants liberally scrolls.
The video goes dark. A fly lands on the screen and merrily cleans its teeth.
***
Lori R. Lopez writes poems, short stories, novels, songs, and nonfiction as well as a dark often-humorous column called "Poetic Reflections”. Her books include CHOCOLATE-COVERED EYES, DANCE OF THE CHUPACABRAS, THE MACABRE MIND OF LORI R. LOPEZ, OUT-OF-MIND EXPERIENCES, AN ILL WIND BLOWS and THE FAIRY FLY (ages twelve through adult). Her stories and verse appear in anthologies such as MIRAGES: TALES FROM AUTHORS OF THE MACABRE, MASTERS OF HORROR: DAMNED IF YOU DON’T, I BELIEVE IN WEREWOLVES, SOUP OF SOULS, THIRSTY ARE THE DAMNED, and SCARE PACKAGE: 14 TALES OF TERROR. Fifteen of Lori’s poems were published for an anthology titled IN DARKNESS WE PLAY (Triskaideka Books).
BIO
Lori R. Lopez writes poems, short stories, novels, songs, and nonfiction as well as a dark often-humorous column called "Poetic Reflections”. Her books include CHOCOLATE-COVERED EYES, DANCE OF THE CHUPACABRAS, THE MACABRE MIND OF LORI R. LOPEZ, OUT-OF-MIND EXPERIENCES, AN ILL WIND BLOWS and THE FAIRY FLY (ages twelve through adult). Her stories and verse appear in anthologies such as MIRAGES: TALES FROM AUTHORS OF THE MACABRE, MASTERS OF HORROR: DAMNED IF YOU DON’T, I BELIEVE IN WEREWOLVES, SOUP OF SOULS, THIRSTY ARE THE DAMNED, and SCARE PACKAGE: 14 TALES OF TERROR. Fifteen of Lori’s poems were published for an anthology titled IN DARKNESS WE PLAY (Triskaideka Books).
MORE TITLES FROM LORI R. LOPEZ:
OUT-OF-MIND EXPERIENCES
(STORY COLLECTION)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Out-Of-Mind-Experiences-Thirteen-Tales-ebook/dp/B0072JRUVE/
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Out-Of-Mind-Experiences-Thirteen-Tales-ebook/dp/B0072JRUVE/
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/out-of-mind-experiences-lori-r-lopez/1101035249
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/127175
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/Out-Mind-Experiences-Thirteen-Tales/dp/1438216602
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DANCE OF THE CHUPACABRAS
(NOVEL)
http://www.amazon.com/Dance-Chupacabras-Trilogy-Trilogies-ebook/dp/B007KTUZQ8
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Dance-Chupacabras-Trilogy-Trilogies-ebook/dp/B007KTUZQ8
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/dance-of-the-chupacabras-lori-r-lopez/1018911150
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/142389
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/Dance-Chupacabras-Trilogies-Lori-Lopez/dp/144951393X
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CHOCOLATE-COVERED EYES: A SAMPLER OF HORROR
(STORY COLLECTION)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Chocolate-Covered-Eyes-Sampler-Horror-ebook/dp/B00612RJ6E/
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Chocolate-Covered-Eyes-Sampler-Horror-ebook/dp/B00612RJ6E/
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1107021882
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/100362
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/Chocolate-Covered-Eyes-Sampler-Of-Horror/dp/1481001957
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Chocolate-Covered-Eyes-Lori-R-Lopez/dp/1481001957
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POETIC REFLECTIONS: KEEP THE HEART OF A CHILD
(VOLUME OF VERSE)
http://www.amazon.com/Poetic-Reflections-Heart-Child-ebook/dp/B00BFRX3S8
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Poetic-Reflections-Heart-Child-ebook/dp/B00BFRX3S8
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1046006287
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/285618
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/poetic-reflections-keep-heart-child/dp/1451586531
http://www.amazon.co.uk/poetic-reflections-keep-heart-child/dp/1451586531
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UNLEASHED
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Unleashed-Tail-One-ebook/dp/B006NQFBUO
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Unleashed-Tail-One-ebook/dp/B006NQFBUO
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/unleashed-lori-r-lopez/1108019919
(FREE) http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/115698
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HEARTBEAT
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Heartbeat-ebook/dp/B006NQHFZI
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Heartbeat-ebook/dp/B006NQHFZI
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/heartbeat-lori-r-lopez/1108019924
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/115703
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BEDEVILED
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bedeviled-ebook/dp/B006QESGWI/
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/bedeviled-lori-r-lopez/1108072781
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/117606
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CREEP
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Creep-ebook/dp/B0070OB7D8/
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Creep-ebook/dp/B0070OB7D8/
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creep-lori-r-lopez/1108357053
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/125618
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FOSSIL
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Fossil-ebook/dp/B007MHI718
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Fossil-ebook/dp/B007MHI718
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/fossil-lori-r-lopez/1109606107
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/143578
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BLOODPATH
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Bloodpath-ebook/dp/B007T25JCG
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bloodpath-ebook/dp/B007T25JCG
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1110063857
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/150650
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MACABRE
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Macabre-ebook/dp/B007TYEYOS
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Macabre-ebook/dp/B007TYEYOS
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1110145790
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/151590
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BAD MOOD
(NOVELETTE)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Bad-Mood-ebook/dp/B007TYL5EA
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Bad-Mood-ebook/dp/B007TYL5EA
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1110145811
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/151596
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AN ILL WIND BLOWS by Lori R. Lopez
(NOVEL)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/An-Ill-Wind-Blows-ebook/dp/B008397NO6
http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B008397NO6
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/an-ill-wind-blows-lori-r-lopez/1112474240
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/214330
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/Ill-Wind-Blows-Lori-Lopez/dp/1484097734
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Ill-Wind-Blows-Lori-Lopez/dp/1484097734
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SOME THING by Lori R. Lopez
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Some-Thing-ebook/dp/B0084T2TLW
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Some-Thing-ebook/dp/B0084T2TLW
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/some-thing-lori-r-lopez/1110948811
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/164065
***
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THE LYCANING by Lori R. Lopez
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Lycaning-ebook/dp/B00857522Q
http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Lycaning-ebook/dp/B00857522Q
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1110983214
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/164641
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THE WRAITH by Lori R. Lopez
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Wraith-ebook/dp/B0084T4HD0
http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Wraith-ebook/dp/B0084T4HD0
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-wraith-lori-r-lopez/1110948813
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/164066
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UNNATURAL by Lori R. Lopez
(SHORT STORY)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008MQ6XTQ
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Unnatural-ebook/dp/B008MQ6XTQ
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/unnatural-lori-r-lopez/1112161362?ean=2940014969024
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/206387
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JUGULAR by Lori R. Lopez
(NOVELETTE)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Jugular-ebook/dp/B008R9DHQU
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Jugular-ebook/dp/B008R9DHQU
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/jugular-lori-r-lopez/1112323999
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/210190
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THE MACABRE MIND OF LORI R. LOPEZ: THIRTEEN TORMENTOUS TALES
(HORROR COLLECTION)
E-BOOK:
http://www.amazon.com/Macabre-Mind-Lori-Lopez-ebook/dp/B0090GMY18
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Macabre-Mind-Lori-Lopez-ebook/dp/B0090GMY18
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-macabre-mind-of-lori-r-lopez-lori-r-lopez/1112581164
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/217497
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/Macabre-Mind-Lori-Lopez-Tormentous/dp/148107976X
http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Macabre-Mind-Lori-Lopez/dp/148107976X
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MONSTROSITIES
(NOVELLA)
http://www.amazon.com/Monstrosities-ebook/dp/B009Y01R40
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Monstrosities-ebook/dp/B009Y01R40
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/monstrosities-lori-r-lopez/1114234983
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/279210
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CEREAL BOX SURPRISE
(SHORT STORY)
http://www.amazon.com/Cereal-Box-Surprise-ebook/dp/B009YP7RJY
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Cereal-Box-Surprise-ebook/dp/B009YP7RJY
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/cereal-box-surprise-lori-r-lopez/1113688365
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/249873
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BEYOND THE STUMP
(SHORT STORY)
http://www.amazon.com/Beyond-The-Stump-ebook/dp/B00ADIF8E2
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Beyond-The-Stump-ebook/dp/B00ADIF8E2
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/beyond-the-stump-lori-r-lopez/1113848559
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/258799
*********************
NUANCE
(SHORT STORY)
http://www.amazon.com/Nuance-ebook/dp/B00ADIFCOS
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Nuance-ebook/dp/B00ADIFCOS
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/nuance-lori-r-lopez/1113848564
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/258804
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NEXT DOOR
(SHORT STORY)
http://www.amazon.com/Next-Door-ebook/dp/B00ADILUWQ
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Next-Door-ebook/dp/B00ADILUWQ
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/next-door-lori-r-lopez/1113848557
(FREE) http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/258798
**********************
HORRENDUS
(SHORT STORY)
http://www.amazon.com/Horrendus-ebook/dp/B00ADIQT8Q
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Horrendus-ebook/dp/B00ADIQT8Q
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/horrendus-lori-r-lopez/1113848553
(FREE) http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/258797
**********************
THE FAIRY FLY
(NOVEL)
http://www.amazon.com/The-Fairy-Fly-ebook/dp/B00CO3NS8M
http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Fairy-Fly-ebook/dp/B00CO3NS8M
Look for the illustrated print edition!
***********************
THE MUDPUPPY
(CHILDREN'S STORYBOOK)
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Mudpuppy-Lori-R-Lopez/dp/1489525297
http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Mudpuppy-Lori-R-Lopez/dp/1489525297
***********************
THE FOX TROT
(CHILDREN'S STORYBOOK)
PRINT:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Fox-Trot-Lori-Lopez/dp/1489527338
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Fox-Trot-Lori-R-Lopez/dp/1489527338
Suzi M
Scarred
by Suzi M
Staring at your own headstone is no way to start the evening, most people will tell you. Depending on the time and circumstances, I find staring at your own epitaph on your custom-made grave marker can really put your night in perspective. Nothing says you wasted your life quite like the old cliché ‘so-and-so will be missed’ sort of thing that distantly related relatives will slap onto that piece of rock. And if I have not yet had my cup of coffee to wake me up before staring at the hard gray truth… well, that makes for a shitty night for everyone.
I kicked my feet up onto the scarred surface of my desk-- an ancient wooden model with drawers that protested doing their built in duty more than a john paying for a trick. Staring at the tips of my shoes, I considered polishing them up for a more professional appearance; then decided it would be easier to just get a new pair of shoes. Ones without holes in the soles and along the uppers. From my reclined position I could still make out the curved top of my tombstone lurking in the shadows. I pulled open the bottom drawer of the desk and decided the best thing to do to set things right would be to American up my whiskey with a shot of coffee.
This is usually around the time that the hot chick walks into the noir detective’s office and flounces more tit and ass than a guy can say no to, but I am sadly not that noir detective nor would the tactic work. I look good in a suit, sure, but I like the men. On an optimistic note, I am told that it is fairly normal behavior for women to feel that way. Whatever passes for normal, anyway. I am sure I still pass for a woman, but beyond that, I am totally at a loss.
Coming back from the dead was my first mistake. Going back to work instead of cashing out my sick days was my second mistake. After all, death was a very plausible excuse for not going to work. I think they may even give more time off if the person who died is you. As I said before, I am sadly not a noir detective, and this is not a noir detective story. I refuse to go sleuthing amongst the offices of human resources to find out how much time off I should be taking to mourn my own passing.
I could hear footsteps in the dingy hallway outside my office door, and then in walked a very agitated model of masculinity. His eyes darted here and there, then fell onto my desk and its little placard with my name and title.
“What can I do for you?” I asked casually while lighting a cigarette.
He looked to protest my smoking and I arched an eyebrow that said ‘now was not a good time to talk about my bad habits.’ I sucked in a breath and blew the smoke away from us, not that it helped in the small office.
“This is going to sound crazy,” he started.
“You died. From the looks of you, I’d say it was by car accident.”
He looked amazed. “Yes.”
“And now you’re wondering
what the hell you’re doing back amongst the air-breathers.”
“Yes!”
“Mmmmm-hmmm.”
“How did you know?”
I nodded to my own gravestone, squinting against the smoke. “Join the club, Hon. I’ve been getting calls off the hook since I came back.”
He seemed genuinely disturbed by my office decoration. I have to admit, I could not remember how I had gotten the thing from my grave and into the office with me. Something in the back of what I assumed were my now maggots for brains told me I really should not investigate further into my demise; nor should I try to solve this undead Honey’s case.
“Do you know what happened to us?”
“Nope. Not a clue.”
“Will you find out for me? I need to know what’s going on.”
“Sorry, guy, I have my own worries. Since the resurrection I’ve decided to live a much more in the now life. That means I don’t worry about the past, and I don’t think about the future.”
“I can pay….”
It sounded almost like a question, I had to smirk. I shook my head as I dropped my beat up shoes off my beat up desk and onto an even more beat up floor.
“Money’s passé. I’m not quite sure what happened, but I don’t want to know.”
He stared at me as if I had died and come back from the grave. I sucked another drag off my cancer stick and regarded him for a moment, regretting my choice even before the words were out of my mouth. I have always been a sucker for blue-eyed frat boys and a man in uniform.
“Fine. I’ll see what I can do.”
In the end it all turned out to be a fluke. The dead started to drop off again and were quickly buried in vaults that were sealed. Accusations about government experiments flew, but no country stepped up to take the blame for it, and so there was no donkey on which to pin the proverbial tail.
Blue Eyes came back to my office looking hopeful. My poker face is not a good one, and he quickly got the idea that I had some bad news.
“Sorry,” I began, “No answers…. We’re just an accident.”
“What does that mean?”