For a moment Jane said nothing, and then—she burst into laughter.
And Millie couldn’t help but laugh, too.
They stayed in the kitchen for a long time, talking about food and boba tea and Japanese dramas, and even Scott gave up on the movie and decided to join them. Millie felt like they were all different notes that had finally found the right harmony. They were a chord. A unit. A family.
For the first time in a very long time, Millie felt like everything was going to be okay.
CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE
The energy was different on the last day of school. It felt lighter, like you could do anything and not get in trouble for it.
Not that Millie ever wanted to get in trouble again. She was happy to stick by the rules from now on.
After class, she hurried to the theater, snaking her way through a crowd that was determined to get home as fast as possible. But Millie had made a promise, and she didn’t intend to break it.
She opened one of the side doors to the auditorium, watching as the light spilled across the empty chairs. She saw them right away—her friends, waiting for her up on the stage. Climbing the steps shakily, she saw Zuki in the middle, her orange backpack tight over her shoulders. She didn’t look empty or full, bright or dark. She looked calm.
And even though Millie’s heart felt broken in a thousand places, she knew calm was good.
Zuki needed to breathe, the same way Millie once did. Maybe now she finally could.
“I guess we’re all here,” Zuki said, smiling softly.
Ashley made a face. “I really wish we’d done this over text. I hate goodbyes.”
Luna nudged Ashley’s shoulder. “Be nice,” she whispered playfully.
Rainbow frowned. “It’s bad enough that we’re having to say goodbye to Zuki, but to Millie, too? Who’s going to run J-Club next year?”
A smile crept over Millie’s face. “About that.” She raised her shoulders. “I decided I’m going to stay at Brightside Academy.”
“Really?” Rainbow beamed.
Luna clapped her hands. “Oh, that makes me so happy!”
Even Ashley grinned. “You don’t mind having to play the flute for another year?”
“I don’t mind if it means I get to spend more time with my friends. My parents said they’d ease off the practicing,” Millie explained. “Who knows, maybe I might even start to like it again.”
“I’m seriously jealous,” Zuki said. “I so wish I had more time with you all.” She looked around the auditorium longingly. “I’m going to really miss this place.”
Millie took her hand. “We’ll stay in touch.” She looked around. “All of us.”
Zuki nodded sadly, and Rainbow reached for her hand. Luna clasped her fingers through Rainbow’s and held her other hand out to Ashley. For a moment Ashley and Luna stared at each other, a look of peaceful recognition passing over their faces.
And then Ashley took Luna’s hand and held firm.
The five of them stood, hands joined together like a row of paper dolls.
No, Millie thought. Not paper dolls. Paper dolls could be severed or torn or ripped into pieces.
Their friendship was stronger than that. Bigger than that.
“So this is really it.” Millie’s voice danced across the stage.
“Yeah,” Zuki said. “This is goodbye.”
They stood in silence for a long time, holding hands like they didn’t want the moment to get away from them.
Maybe in life, some things had to come to an end, even when you didn’t want them to. Maybe part of growing up was learning to say goodbye.
But maybe some goodbyes didn’t have to be forever.
And Millie could feel it in the deepest part of her heart: someday they’d all find each other again.
They looked out into the imaginary audience and took a bow.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I owe the most enormous thank-you in the world to my brilliant editor, Trisha de Guzman. Getting to work on this story with you was truly an honor. Our little book has grown so much since that first phone call, and I’m beyond grateful Millie and company had your editorial magic to help bring them to life. Thank you for handling this book with so much love and care!
I am also eternally grateful to my super-agent, Penny Moore. Five acknowledgments later, and I still can’t believe this is real life. Thank you for always believing in my words and for being the best teammate to have fighting in my corner. You’re the best.
Thank you to the truly fantastic team at Macmillan and FSG for turning this story into a real book and for all your help and thoughtfulness behind the scenes. Special shout-out to Taylor Pitts, Cassie Gonzales, and Celeste Cass—I’m so grateful for all that you do!
And a very special thank-you to the mega-talented Jen Bartel, whose artwork has been hanging on my office walls long before I ever knew who was doing the cover art for this book. You brought Millie and her friends to life so perfectly. Total dream come true.
Thank you to the team at Aevitas Creative Management for being so supportive of my books and career, and to all the incredible booksellers, librarians, book bloggers, and reviewers who help get stories like Millie’s into the hands of the readers who need them most. You’re all superstars.
To all the readers, new and old—thank you for reading. If it weren’t for all of you, I wouldn’t be able to keep doing this job that I love. I know some of you write to tell me that my books have made your worlds a little brighter and a little less lonely, and I want you to know that every time you pick up a book of mine, it does the same thing for me. I’m beyond grateful to each and every one of you.
To the friends I’ve had over the years: thank you for sitting next to me so I wouldn’t be alone. Thank you for the hundreds of notes and texts and phone calls. Thank you for being the people I looked forward to seeing every day. But most of all, thank you for the memories.
And to my family and friends today, who listen to my worries and encourage me even when I’m plagued with self-doubt—thank you. This job would be a million times harder without you.
Ross, Shaine, and Oliver—you three are my everything. Thank you for being patient when I’m working long hours and juggling deadlines. Thank you for bringing me cups of chai, sharing your snacks, and looking after my Animal Crossing island. And thank you for letting me be your family. Writing is my favorite job, but hanging out with you three is my favorite kind of existence. I love you all times infinity.
ALSO BY AKEMI DAWN BOWMAN
Starfish
Summer Bird Blue
Harley in the Sky
The Infinity Courts series
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Akemi Dawn Bowman is a critically-acclaimed author who writes across genres. Her novels have received multiple accolades and award nominations, and her debut novel, Starfish, was a William C. Morris Award Finalist. She has a BA in social sciences from the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, and currently lives in Scotland with her husband and two children. She overthinks everything, including this bio. Visit Akemi online at her website on on Instagram. You can sign up for email updates here.
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CONTENTS
Title Page
Copyright Notice
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapte
r Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Forty
Chapter Forty-One
Chapter Forty-Two
Chapter Forty-Three
Chapter Forty-Five
Chapter Forty-Six
Chapter Forty-Seven
Chapter Forty-Eight
Chapter Forty-Nine
Chapter Fifty
Chapter Fifty-One
Chapter Fifty-Two
Chapter Fifty-Three
Chapter Fifty-Four
Chapter Fifty-Five
Chapter Fifty-Six
Chapter Fifty-Seven
Chapter Fifty-Eight
Chapter Fifty-Nine
Acknowledgments
Also by Akemi Dawn Bowman
About the Author
Copyright
Farrar Straus Giroux Books for Young Readers
An imprint of Macmillan Publishing Group, LLC
120 Broadway, New York, NY 10271
mackids.com
Copyright © 2021 by Akemi Dawn Bowman. All rights reserved.
Our e-books may be purchased in bulk for promotional, educational, or business use. Please contact the Macmillan Corporate and Premium Sales Department at 1-800-221-7945, extension 5442, or by e-mail at MacmillanSpecialMarkets@macmillan.com.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.
ISBN 978-0-374-31373-9 (ebook)
eISBN: 9780374313739
First edition, 2021