Beowulf is back, but for how long? Already on the run, he is drawn into multitude of conspiracies surrounding the French Succession. Pursued by assassins, trolls and a mysterious stranger, Beowulf is drawn into a high stakes game of 'which Louis should be king?' Look out for ambush, intrigue, fast donkey carts, fried chicken, philosophy and true love! Making the dark ages even darker!Beowulf is back, and in deep trouble. Not only are his usual enemies still seeking revenge for the unpleasantness surrounding the destruction of the Biggest Beer Hall Ever Built; now the Pope wants him dead as well. This entangles Beowulf in the complexities and dangers of Holy Gambling and the French Succession crisis (A clear case of too many Louis spoiling the plot!). Without even trying, Beowulf finds himself working for (and against) the French Army, The Church, The Pope, The Britons and the Evil Duke of Jutland (who may just be his Father.) Someone is going to end up King, but which of the Louis, will it be, and how will our hero without a moral compass decide?Throw in a deadly assassin, a mysterious messenger, high stakes poker, spit roasted chicken, a perilous chase in ‘fast’ donkey carts, true love and a philosophical approach to imminent dismemberment and you are ready for the next instalment!

The First Full Length Stephanie Plum Between-the-Numbers Novel from #1 Bestselling Author Janet Evanovich. Turn on all the lights and check under your bed. Things are about to get spooky in Trenton, New Jersey. According to legend, the Jersey Devil prowls the Pine Barrens and soars above the treetops in the dark of night. As eerie as this might seem, there are things in the Barrens that are even more frightening and dangerous. And there are monkeys. Lots of monkeys. Wulf Grimoire is a world wanderer and an opportunist who can kill without remorse and disappear like smoke. He’s chosen Martin Munch, boy genius, as his new business partner, and he’s chosen the Barrens as his new playground. Munch received his doctorate degree in quantum physics when he was twenty-two. He’s now twenty-four, and while his brain is large, his body hasn’t made it out of the boys’ department at Macy’s. Anyone who says good things come in small packages hasn’t met Munch. Wulf Grimoire is looking for world domination. Martin Munch would be happy if he could just get a woman naked and tied to a tree. Bounty hunter Stephanie Plum has Munch on her most-wanted list for failure to appear in court. Plum is the all-American girl stuck in an uncomfortable job, succeeding on luck and tenacity. Usually she gets her man. This time she gets a monkey. She also gets a big guy named Diesel. Diesel pops in and out of Plum’s life like birthday cake – delicious to look at and taste, not especially healthy as a steady diet, gone by the end of the week if not sooner. He’s an über bounty hunter with special skills when it comes to tracking men and pleasing women. He’s after Grimoire, and now he’s also after Munch. And if truth were told, he wouldn’t mind setting Stephanie Plum in his crosshairs. Diesel and Plum hunt down Munch and Grimoire, following them into the Barrens, surviving cranberry bogs, the Jersey Devil, a hair-raising experience, sand in their underwear, and, of course . . . monkeys.

Two humorous short stories. In A Fairy Tail, Sir Craig desperately tries to rescue his beloved from a fiendish sorcerer, but Boots, a shapechanging unicorn, has other ideas. Out of the Bag features a moment in Jason the cop's day - with surprising results.This light-hearted short story duo is sure to make you smile, chortle, and outright laugh. A Fairy Tail follows the desperate adventures of Sir Craig as he works to rescue his beloved from a fiendish sorcerer. However, Boots, a ragged young man who has a habit of shapechanging into various creatures including a unicorn, is a rival for fair Gregoria's hand. Will Craig rescue Gregoria? Will Boots get to eat apples out of Gregoria's hand? Or will darker forces intervene to keep these lovers apart? Out of the Bag is a short short story, but long on imagination. Jason the cop expects a normal day on the force, but a chance encounter on a breaking and entering call changes everything.

Long ago, magic began to fade, and the underemployed magicians of Kazam Mystical Arts Management have been forced to take any work their sixteen-year-old acting manager, Jennifer Strange, can scare up. But things are about to change. Magical power is finally on the rise, and King Snodd IV, of the Ununited Kingdoms knows that he who controls magic controls everything. Only one person stands between Snodd and his plans for a magic-grab--and that's Jennifer. Yet even smart and sensible Jennifer would have trouble against these powers-that-be. The king and his cronies will do anything to succeed--including ordering a just-might-be-rigged contest between Kazam and iMagic, Kazam's only competitor in the magic business. With underhanded shenanigans afoot, how can Kazam possibly win? Whatever happens, one this is certain: Jennifer Strange will not relinquish the noble powers of magic without a fight.

Professor Dr. von Igelfeld Entertainment - Book 3 The Professor Dr. von Igelfeld Entertainment series slyly skewers academia, chronicling the comic misadventures of the endearingly awkward Professor Dr. Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld, and his long-suffering colleagues at the Institute of Romantic Philology in Germany. Readers who fell in love with Precious Ramotswe, proprietor of The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency, now have new cause for celebration in the protagonist of these three light-footed comic novels by Alexander McCall Smith. Welcome to the insane and rarified world of Professor Dr. Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld of the Institute of Romance Philology. Von Igelfeld is engaged in a never-ending quest to win the respect he feels certain he is due–a quest which has the tendency to go hilariously astray. In At the Villa of Reduced Circumstances, Professor Dr. von Igelfeld gets caught up in a nasty case of academic intrigue while on sabbatical at Cambridge. When he returns to Regensburg he is confronted with the thrilling news that someone from a foreign embassy has actually checked his masterwork, Portuguese Irregular Verbs, out of the Institute’s Library. As a result, he gets caught up in intrigue of a different sort on a visit to Bogota, Colombia. From the Trade Paperback edition.

The New York Times Book Review called Neal Stephenson's most recent novel "electrifying" and "hilarious".  but if you want to know Stephenson was doing twenty years before he wrote the epic Cryptonomicon, it's back-to-school time. Back to The Big U, that is, a hilarious send-up of American college life starring after years our of print, The Big U is required reading for anyone interested in the early work of this singular writer.

"It's funny when a dinosaur tackles the big questions"Meet Philosoraptor. Just your average everyday dinosaur trying to tackle today's unanswered questions on life, people and the cosmos. Philosoraptor is famous for his deep thinking and his insightful view as he ponders, "If a hipster became mainstream what would hipster be?""It's funny when a dinosaur tackles the big questions"Meet Philosoraptor. Just your average everyday dinosaur trying to tackle today's unanswered questions on life, people and the cosmos. Philosoraptor is famous for his deep thinking and his insightful view as he ponders, "If a hipster became mainstream what would hipster be?" or "If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do all the other swimmers drown too?". Being a philosopher may not be easy for him, but it's hilarious for us!So sit back and enjoy this premium collection of some of the funniest deep thinking you'll ever find in an eBook.Everyone loves a Quikee!Quikees are a new type of eBook designed to deliver maximum entertainment at the lowest possible price. Follow us on twitter @quikees or online at quikees.com to keep up with the news and new eBook releases as they happen. Everyone has time for a quikee!

From the collection Dreamin’ Dreams; A short humourous story in 2,000 words.In Ireland 1942, you made your own fun!Anyway, my turn came and I threw the shovel the highest, but this time it came straight back down like a guillotine and it took the tip off my brother’s nose. We all froze in horror. Then my sister picked up the tip and stuck it back on his face a second before the scream came.Every family has a secret. When a peculiar couple moves into the derelict house across the street, Marty White, the only kid resident of the Dullest Place in the Universe, is certain they have something to hide. What he discovers is something not only out of this world, but in a different world entirely.Marty's new neighbours, the Beatniks, have uncovered a connection to Over There—a world just like Marty's one, but backwards—in their bathroom mirror. Over There is filled with reflections: malevolent doppelgängers his world was never meant to see. No sooner does Marty discover this place when he finds himself standing in it. At first this seems like nothing more than his neighbours' cruel attempt at getting rid of him, but he soon realises there's much more to it than that.Marty has his own secret. A big one. He just doesn't know it yet.

Internationally bestselling novelist and American icon Tom Robbins's long-awaited tale of his wild life and times, both at home and around the globe Tom Robbins's warm, wise, and wonderfully weird novels–including Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Another Roadside Attraction, and Jitterbug Perfume–provide an entryway into the frontier of his singular imagination. Madcap but sincere, pulsating with strong social and philosophical undercurrents, his irreverent classics have introduced countless readers to hitchhiking cowgirls, born-again monkeys, a philosophizing can of beans, exiled royalty, and problematic redheads. In Tibetan Peach Pie, Robbins turns that unparalleled literary sensibility inward, weaving together stories of his unconventional life–from his Appalachian childhood to his globe-trotting adventures–told in his unique voice, which combines the sweet and sly, the spiritual and earthy. The grandchild of Baptist preachers, Robbins would become, over the course of half a century, a poet interruptus, a soldier, a meteorologist, a radio DJ, an art-critic-turned-psychedelic-journeyman, a world-famous novelist, and a counterculture hero, leading a life as unlikely, magical, and bizarre as those of his quixotic characters. Robbins offers intimate snapshots of Appalachia during the Great Depression, the West Coast during the sixties' psychedelic revolution, international roving before Homeland Security monitored our travels, and New York publishing when it still relied on trees. Written with the big-hearted comedy and mesmerizing linguistic invention for which Robbins is known, Tibetan Peach Pie is an invitation into the private world of a literary legend.

"I’m pregnant." Molly Gilmore had a good life before she uttered those two stupid words. While preparing to graduate from culinary school and building up the courage to make a move on her hot, sugar-cookie-smelling pastry instructor Marco, she can't wait to finally have the GREAT life she’s always dreamed about, instead of just the good one she’s been living. Always known as the quiet ninja, she fully intends to stay hidden in the shadows with her nut-job family, so they have no chance to embarrass her around the man she's crushed on for two years. Unfortunately, her family has other plans. When they yank her straight out of her comfort zone, she finds herself starring in the craziest train wreck she's ever witnessed. Molly ultimately gets a more exciting life that doesn't revolve around school, but she's pretty sure the man of her dreams won't be sticking around long after her family gets ahold of him. There aren't too many guys who can handle smelling like pee, having the whole world know how he masturbates, and being forced to eat an entire bag of dicks. Join the Chocolate Lovers and Chocoholics gang for one final story about love, baked goods, making poor life choices, and remembering how important family is—even if they drive you insane. Mostly because it's illegal to kill them.

From the person who brought you the blog "www.thinkormsby.com" Michael W. Ormsby's first book is a collection of comical and sometimes absurd perceptions about the differences between men and women.These Brother Gregory stories are historical scientific fiction. They start on a cold night in Brno in 1865 when the world learns, for the first time, about the mechanism of genetic inheritance. A giant scientific mystery was revealed, but the time was not quite right. Why? Meet Gregor Mendel, his friends - and his enemies - and find the answer.

Rolo, one of a trio of loveable mice that live in a movie theatre, develops a dance talent. Will it lead to fame and fortune or sorrow? Please note this book is similar in tone to Ratatouille and so should be read by parents before it is given to young children.Rolo, one of a trio of loveable mice that live in a movie theatre, develops a dance talent. Will it lead to fame and fortune or sorrow? Please note this book is similar in tone to Ratatouille and so should be read by parents before it is given to young children.The characters in this story are based on those introduced in ‘Mice Movie’, ‘Homing Mouse’ and ‘The Mice Meet a War Hero’. The original idea for this story was developed in March 2014 and it was published on 31st May 2014.If you appreciated this short story please, if you are able, make a small donation to a charity of your choice.

Since Xanth began, the gargoyles of that magical place have been under a magical compulsion to protect the purity of the Swan Knee River which flows into Xanth from dreary Mundania. But recently the pollution from the outside world has grown ever greater, and young Gary Gar, latest in a long line of gargoyle guardians, is finding it ever more difficult to fulfill his responsibilities. So Gary does what any sensible Xanth resident with a dire dilemma would do. He goes to see the Good Magician Humfrey, who sends him on a peculiar quest--to transform himself into human shape, tutor a precocious child with more than her share of wild magical talents, and find a philter which can restore the river to its previous pristine state.

Melody's eyes met with the Bardo -- and she knew she would never be the same again.It all began with a blood-curdling scream in the middle of the night. This spurs on an investigation by Melody Jackson and her family which leads all over Portland. Enlisting the help of Lonnie's friends, Chazz and Malika, the group looks to resolve the mystery of not only the woman in white, but of two mysterious men in a van, and the dreaded Bardo!Melody Jackson is back in an all new series of tales. In this first story, Melody and her family are confronted with some terrible business going on in the weather station across the street.Note: This begins a new series, which is a prequel to the Novel "Melody Jackson and the House on Lafayette Street". It is a separate series and it's not imperative that they be read prior to the original novel.

Young men with too much money and not enough sense in Cold War Berlin.A short collection of stories set in 1980's Berlin before the wall came down. Quirky, funny, thought provoking by turns, Ewan Alexander Lawrie's book tells how it might well have been, without falling foul of libel laws.