Stephen Jones is a shiny new hire at Zephyr Holdings. From the outside, Zephyr is just another bland corporate monolith, but behind its glass doors business is far from usual: the beautiful receptionist is paid twice as much as anybody else to do nothing, the sales reps use self help books as manuals, no one has seen the CEO, no one knows exactly what they are selling, and missing donuts are the cause of office intrigue. While Jones originally wanted to climb the corporate ladder, he now finds himself descending deeper into the irrational rationality of company policy. What he finds is hilarious, shocking, and utterly telling. From the Trade Paperback edition.

In Christopher Moore's ingenious debut novel, we meet one of the most memorably mismatched pairs in the annals of literature. The good-looking one is one-hundred-year-old ex-seminarian and "roads" scholar Travis O'Hearn. The green one is Catch, a demon with a nasty habit of eating most of the people he meets. Behind the fake Tudor facade of Pine Cove, California, Catch sees a four-star buffet. Travis, on the other hand, thinks he sees a way of ridding himself of his toothy traveling companion. The winos, neo-pagans, and deadbeat Lotharios of Pine Cove, meanwhile, have other ideas. And none of them is quite prepared when all hell breaks loose.

From the author of Uncle Tom’s Cabin, a domestic comedy that examines slavery, Protestant theology, and gender differences in early America.First published in 1859, Harriet Beecher Stowe’s third novel is set in eighteenth-century Newport, Rhode Island, a community known for its engagement in both religious piety and the slave trade. Mary Scudder lives in a modest farmhouse with her widowed mother and their boarder, Samuel Hopkins, a famous Calvinist theologian who preaches against slavery. Mary is in love with the passionate James Marvyn, but Mary is devout and James is a skeptic, and Mary’s mother opposes the union. James goes to sea, and when he is reportedly drowned, Mary is persuaded to become engaged to Dr. Hopkins. With colorful characters, including many based on real figures, and a plot that hinges on romance, The Minister’s Wooing combines comedy with regional history to show the convergence of daily life, slavery, and religion in post-Revolutionary New England. For more than seventy years, Penguin has been the leading publisher of classic literature in the English-speaking world. With more than 1,700 titles, Penguin Classics represents a global bookshelf of the best works throughout history and across genres and disciplines. Readers trust the series to provide authoritative texts enhanced by introductions and notes by distinguished scholars and contemporary authors, as well as up-to-date translations by award-winning translators. 

The hilarious new book from the star of Chelsea Lately and the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea. Get ready for big laughs as Chelsea Handler lets loose with more comic personal essays. In this new, no-holds-barred account of life on the ridiculous side, Chelsea mines the wealth of material that is her family, her sex life, her career, and her distinctively outrageous worldview. Here is young Chelsea discovering "The Feeling" during a third-grade sleepover and getting shafted by clueless parents over Cabbage Patch dolls...and grown-up Chelsea at the mercy of the remote control, Lean Pockets, and Sex and the City --but still managing to convince her boyfriend that there are Swiss Army knives in the soles of her $16,000 shoes. Through it all, Chelsea never lets anyone off the hook, even herself, as she delivers page after page of irreverent humor, biting wit, and deliciously off-kilter entertainment.

Of three-story robots and childhood turf wars. A short memoir about children misbehaving.Camp Deerfield offers delights innumerable for the young camper: nightly dances, grade-school turf wars, and a three-story robot that doubles as a toilet.A short memoir about children misbehaving.

A murder has been committed: a street entertainer, found apparently battered to death with a very small blunt object, on him bite marks from a very small crocodile. Investigating the incident in his typically direct manner, Carrot Ironfoundersson discovers the truth...

This is an epic drinking game. The rules are simple, the gameplay is socially interactive, and the objective is inebriated fun. All you need is some imagination, other players, and lots of canned beer! ...oh yeah, and this ebook. Cheers!This is a short story set during one of Rome's civil wars-—Caesar's Civil War which was fought between Julius Caesar and Pompey the Great. The story begins after Caesar's crossing of the Rubicon river. Caesar and Pompey are embroiled in a war whose outcome will determine the future of the Roman Republic. During the story, the two generals battle several times as their armies traverse the Roman Republic's territories, ultimately meeting at the battle of Pharsalus in 48 B.C.

When a ferocious hurricane rips through southern Florida, the con artists and carpetbaggers waste no time in swarming over the disaster area. Among the predators are Edie Marsh, an entrepreneurial young woman whose scheme to sleep with a Palm Beach Kennedy has fizzled, freezing her to concoct a colossal insurance rip-off; Lester Maddox Parsons, a murderous ex-con whose violent encounter with a game warden has left him with the fitting name of “Snapper”; and Avila, a crooked building inspector-turned-roofer who dabbles somewhat unsuccessfully in the occult.  Caught in the middle are Max and Bonnie Lamb, newlyweds torn in wildly different directions by the storm. It is Max’s fateful decision to abort their Disney World honeymoon and race to Dade County to see the terrible devastation. Armed with a video camera, the ambitious young advertising executive can’t wait to show his hurricane tapes to his buddies back in New York.  Over Bonnie’s objections, Max eagerly sets out through the rubble, debris and mayhem—and promptly vanishes. The only clue to his whereabouts: a runaway monkey. The only person who can help Bonnie’s search: a mysterious young man with a tranquilizer gun and a roomful of human skulls.  But there’s also a man called Skink who has devoted his very strange existence to saving Florida from the kinds of people blown in by the hurricane. It is he, crazed and determined, who prowls the swath of the storm and forever changes the lives of Max, Bonnie, Edie and the others. Their paths—tangled before they even know it—come together in a novel that continues the hilarious and scathing muckraking tradition that Carl Hiaasen has so mercilessly made his own. In Stormy Weather, there is no calm eye. BONUS: This edition includes an excerpt from Carl Hiaasen's Bad Monkey.

The Evil Librarians are still up to their antics and it's up to Alcatraz Smedry to put a stop to it! This second book will take Alcatraz and company on an exploration of the Library of Alexandria, which -- despite Librarian rumors -- was never destroyed. It is a mysterious place and everyone knows that it holds dark secrets. Can Alcatraz, with his talent for breaking things, break into this secret world? Or will the Evil Librarians once again prevail?

Darth Vader isn't scared! Nothing can scare Lord Vader. Right?

A new world is needed, one has been found and there's a man who can get us there. His name: Spaceman Sam. The only problem is, he flies solo, he always uses the same broken down capsule and looks more like a surfer than an astronaut. So, even though he's the man for the job, it's feared he doesn't have the political correctness to negotiate with the natives already there.Spaceman Sam is the type of male every man wants to be. His skin is tan, his hair is long, curly and blonde. All the woman want him and the political leaders want to be seen with him. Why...? He's truly an American hero. He is known for flying solo and always uses the same space ship. He only accepts the missions the other Astronauts fear and since there's a new world that's been found. Sam would seem to be the likely candidate to take us there. But this mission is different, this mission life may already be in the new world.... If so, does Spaceman Sam possess the political correctness to gain us access? Can he negotiate with the alien life? Is he capable of being the modern day, Columbus? Will there be a day set aside? A holiday? A Spaceman Sam Day? As time passes and lift off closes in and even though he's the only one who can get there, the public begins to turn on Spaceman Sam. Now there's a race to get Spaceman off the ground before they insist on sending another, less competent pilot.

*Jailbird* takes us into a fractured and comic, pure Vonnegut world of high crimes and misdemeanors in government—and in the heart. This wry tale follows bumbling bureaucrat Walter F. Starbuck from Harvard to the Nixon White House to the penitentiary as Watergate’s least known co-conspirator. But the humor turns dark when Vonnegut shines his spotlight on the cold hearts and calculated greed of the mighty, giving a razor-sharp edge to an unforgettable portrait of power and politics in our times. *From the Trade Paperback edition.*

Blackboard Galaxy is a humorous science fiction story about a teacher who has dreamed of teaching in space. Now that she is living her dream, she must find ways to discipline students besides eating them, as that is the standard protocol among alien teachers. This story originally appeared in Issue 6 of Untied Shoelaces of the Mind. The author based this story on her experiences teaching.Blackboard Galaxy is a humorous science fiction story about a teacher who has dreamed of teaching in space. Now that she is living her dream, she must find ways to discipline students besides eating them, as that is the standard protocol among alien teachers. This story originally appeared in Issue 6 of Untied Shoelaces of the Mind. The author based this story on her experiences teaching middle school students. The line, "Does this look like a face that cares?" is a direct quote from a thirteen year old.

Chloe is a private investigator hired to find a missing painting. Chloe's brother and his hot, new partner are detectives in the Rapides Parish Sherriff's Department keep getting in her way. They don't slow her down but the person shooting at her does. But doesn't stop her from her task. Chloe's adventure is funny to everyone but her.Chloe Babineaux is a private investigator from central Louisiana with an aggravating cop brother who has a hot, new partner who apparently doesn't understand English. The words 'stay away' confounds him. Chloe is hired to find a missing painting. No problem if the painting hasn't been missing for long. Problem: It's been missing for 100 years. She digs her heels in and hunts for the elusive painting. Her family she can avoid the person shooting at her is harder to do.Chloe's adventures are funny, intriguing and will keep you turning the pages.Chloe Babineaux Private InvestigatorChloe Babineaux In Over Her Head

On a beautiful summer's day, Elwood and Wingclipper search a planet for valuable coins scattered by a crashed ship, while Rodeena makes a sinister discovery on board the Chromium Bullet.A man of the written word, he has made himself a name in the literary community in the year 2035. But someone has dared to plagiarize his work. When he confronts the culprit, he learns that it was not a person but a computer programmed to replicate his identity. Trapped on all sides by an encroaching world of technology, he tires to escape in any way he can. When he can't do it, he acts out violently against the machines. They become the focus of his rage, and he tries to rally the world to his mission: to save humanity from itself.